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See I think you are very determined and committed (at least what I gather from your posts and replies) and I believe you have great awareness and the ability to make the right choices for yourself. I pretty much know that you haven't come this far to let go completely and go back to old habits. I would also argue that the shame and guilt that accompany you are as detrimental as eating all the processed food in the world. I am not a role model. I eat chips, I eat chocolate, I eat carbs, I eat everything. But I also eat my protein, salads, fruit, veggies. I workout and take my whey, creatine, I take my supplements. I think I have achieved a good balance - that allows me to indulge daily - so I do not sweat the little stuff. IF AND WHEN (sorry for the caps) I see a change in the scale that I don't like, then I address it and evaluate what I can tweak. What does balance look like to you? Living with guilt will never help you achieve a balanced state, worrying too much won't either. Continue doing what you've been doing (you have done fantastic), but get rid of the shame and guilt. These are my thoughts, take them with a grain of salt

I bet you’ve tried a lot of diets and tried many different exercise plans & I bet you’ve were committed to them too but didn’t continue because they didn’t work for you or were to restrictive or had negative side effects, etc. If diets and exercise programs alone worked no one would be obese. People have to change their thinking about how they look at obesity. Obesity is a disease. There are psychological, physiologically, emotional, genetic & other complex & nuanced factors behind obesity. Unless your critics are obese they cannot understand what you have experienced. If you had a respiratory disease, heart disease, cancer, etc. would they say you’re cheating or taking the easy way out by having surgery or taking meds?? You have made a choice to become healthier. You have made a choice to be there for your family and friends for a long time. You have made a choice to be able to live your life as you want to live and enjoy it. Weight loss surgery is not an easy way out. There is no easy fix. Surgery opens the door to an opportunity. What you do with that opportunity is up to you and the long term effort you apply to it. Good on you!

That is the best answer of all. The real answer. Truth is, you could give people a gazillion reasons. They may or may not buy into it. It is their hangup not yours. Your energy is being directed on solving matters with the tools you have available. Your health is the goal...not their feelings about the matter. The people who really care will see you feeling better and doing better and they'll be happy for you. They will also see that there is still much work being done by you....much adherence to a new way of eating....more moving and exercise....more feeling better.

"Surgery is cheating? Oh no! I didn't know there were rules. Have I forfeited my eligibility to be awarded a weight loss trophy? I guess I'll just have to take looking good in my clothing and not dying prematurely as a consolation prize." "You can either be supportive of my decision or you can stop talking because I didn't ask for your opinion and am not seeking advice at this time." "Oh, is today the day we're sharing what we disagree with about each other's life decisions? Hold on, let me go get my list. I've got a few things for you that I'm sure you'll want to hear." The bottom line is, you have the right to live your life the way you see fit. The people making comments like this are not trying to be helpful. They are trying, even if they don't realize it themselves, to control you and take away your right to do what you feel is best for you. When you try to explain and convince them, you play into the idea that they have a right to tell you what to do or that you need their permission. What they don't expect is for you to have the confidence to laugh in their face at their audacity and tell them point blank to get back in their own f*ing lane. And they will not like it one bit when you do, but it'll feel pretty fantastic on your end.

Goodness I cannot believe that my 15 year surgery anniversary will be in October! A friend of mine is considering weight loss surgery so I went looking for this forum again and thought I would do a quick update! I had a VSG in Mexico (Mexicali) in October of 2010. I had zero complications and went from a surgery weight of 276 down to about 125ish. Size 24 to size 0. I had plastics in 2013ish (breast, arms, and tummy). I gained up to about 150/160 and stayed there for many years. Over the past 6 to 7 years I have gained weight thanks to nursing school and the pandemic 🥴 but I'm happy with where I am! I am currently at 170 and in a size 8. (Lots of weight/skin in leg area). My surgery continues to be the best thing that I ever did for myself. The only drawback is that I have GERD, and cannot skip a day without Omeprazole. My labs are fantastic. I can eat pretty a normal size meal but still have some restriction if I go over that. I'll try to remember to come back incase anyone has questions but really I don't think about the surgery or food much anymore 🤗

If you want to try collagen supplementation, you certainly can, though the scientific evidence is a bit of a mixed bag. Some studies seem to show benefit, but I think we have to keep in mind this condition is also a temporary issue brought on by the stress and dietary deficiencies you went through. In short, it's going to resolve by itself over time and thus it's really hard to know if the collagen is actually doing anything. IMO, the best possible thing you can do for your health, for your hair loss, as well as to speed your weight loss would be to really double down on dietary protein intake and not supplements. For those about to jump in and mention that collagen IS protein, yes that's true, but it does not contain all the essential amino acids. As such, you really should not count it toward your daily protein intake. Plus, a capsule isn't going to contain very much protein anyway. I'd guess less than a gram per capsule, though I suspect it might vary based on the source and size of the capsule itself.

You're right — I didn’t go through surgery just to have a reunion tour with my old habits. Still learning what balance looks like for me and my day to day. I will get there! Thank you for this!

@Bypass2Freedom sorry to hear about your breakup. Maybe it is a temporary storm that will pass. I suspect if all the folks who've had WLS were open & honest....we would find many common experiences have occurred in our lives. I'm one of those people who detests change.....no matter that I may be treading water and change may bring a much needed lifebuoy....I'm stubborn and will keep treading water as it is familiar. That was how I was....until WLS. WLS went by uneventful, recover was swift....took a week of vacation time and went back to work. No medical issues....so in my mind there was no need to do anything but the minimum on followup visits with the surgeon. So much change occurred...so quickly....unexpected outcomes....wide open-full throttle-full speed ahead....but I was ill prepared to be at the helm. Felt like I was driving a fast sports car and I only had skills to drive an old beat down truck and only on the back roads. I seem to recall the pre-op class sessions where they gave us the medical risks and the statistical data on relationship survival. I heard it all but didn't listen. I was finally ready to address weight and nothing could deter me. Didn't listen...didn't take part in the group meetings post-surgery. Now....looking back...I see where staying in touch with the WLS support group would have had many benefits.

You make an important point and I would encourage @AmberFL to think about this more and perhaps search their feelings. There is certainly a lot of danger in moralizing food by labeling things "Good", "Bad", "Healthy", "Unhealthy", etc. The flip side is that totally ignoring nutrient density can also be really problematic for some people. Left unchecked, it can be permission to eat nothing but highly-processed foods or to completely ignore macro and micronutrient content. It also can be a trigger for some people in that they lack the self-control to just eat one piece of that cheesecake. Instead, they eat the entire thing. (Not ragging on cheesecake, I had a piece last night, so it was top of mind.) Instead of moral judgements, I think a better guideline might be how what you're eating makes you feel physically. Especially for athletes, are your food choices making you feel energized and ready for your workouts, or are you always dragging? Are you recovering well? These are the main things to focus on. We can successfully eat a wide variety of foods and be healthy, happy and maintain at our optimal weight. The trick is finding that balance.

Congratulations on achieving onderland! Yay! What weight to stop losing at & how to pick a goal weight are interesting questions and you’ll get different responses. I believe it comes down to where your new set point is (the weight your body is happy at & will keep pulling you back to). It’s the weight where you’re not losing anymore and you have reached a sustainable balance of the number of calories you consume and the activity you do. It’s the weight where you’re happy with how you look & feel too. I had a goal (same as yours) which was the low weight I always dropped to before regaining back up from. I exceeded that. I kept losing until my calorie intake which I was increasing and activity level was in balance. I eat in a way that is sustainable & I don’t feel like I’m missing out or if I’m on a continuous diet or that I have to exercise first hours a day. Some reach a weight but found it wasn’t sustainable or they didn’t feel comfortable at so they gain a little. Remember your new set point may not be where you would like it to be. Also your lowest weight may not be where you end up either. Bounce back (a regain of 10 - 20lbs) is always a possibility & can be due to your body resettling, you realising you need more flexibility in the what you eat & the activity you do to find a better life balance, some conplacency, your new set point, etc. Be flexible in your goal. If you don’t reach it, that’s okay. You’ll be in a better healthier place regardless of the number in the scale. Reach a sustainable balance (food intake & activity) in your life that allows you to live & enjoy your life & doesn’t restrict or limit you. All the best.