One week to go

Here I am, a week before my procedure, and I feel like I don't know anything about what happens after I leave the hospital. I wish I had found this site earlier, and plan to read as much as I can for the next week. I'm not sure of my starting weight - 270 or so. I've been this weight for so long, my closet is full of this size. (24-26) While I can't wait to experience the scale moving down, it scares me as well. I am praying I will find out more information about after care - after reading some of your posts, I find myself ignorant about fills, and fluids, and feelings. The reason I'm doing this is simple - I don't want to spend another day, week, month, year like this. Feeling this way. Yet, I am afraid of missing food - of the comfort it does bring. It controls me, and has for too many years, and I've grown too close to it, instead of developing relationships, working on me, feeling good about me. As an Event Producer, with a lot of time spent on Weddings, I always see what that whole "beautiful bride" thing is, and never felt I deserved to be one.

My procedure is booked, I've gone to the nutritionist, the psychologist, and the surgeon. This week I'll be going to the hospital to review other things. I hope I will have a lot of questions to ask, and be able to dull my fears about all this. I want to feel Joy. I pray for some Joy. I expect some pain, some frustration, some concern, some problems. What I hope for - is Joy.

I truely understand how your feeling...I am scheduled for my lapband on the 22nd of this month and I have all of a sudden been on an emotional roller coster wondering if I am being selfish about having it done...I would totally hate to think about my family without me due to something that I chose to do...As far as after the surgery I am sure that it will be a learning experience...I just try to keep up with reading all of these messages and learning from others mistakes...I hope that all turns out well for you and I am sure that all will be wonderful...Just think about what we will look and feel like about this time next year...I have seriously got to stop worrying about what all could happen and just start thinking about all of the positive that could come of it