A new beginning

i'm starting over with my journey to have this surgery done. I thought maybe I could do it without -but I'm so heavy now, I don't even know where to start. I'm so lost in a sea of fat, that I can't find my way out by myself. I'm angry. At myself, at the insurance company, at doctors, at the people that screwed up the first time around and I wasn't able to have the surgery...but its a new day and I'm setting that anger into action to get things done better this time. I have a new insurance company (I have 2 of them, in fact!) So one way or another, I'm going to get my life back. It wasn't that long ago that I was happy and healthy. I need to be that person again.