Feeling kind of depressed at the moment

Yesterday when I got home from the seminar I was in a great mood. Just meeting with the doctor and some of his patients really helped me know that I have done the right thing. When I got home I told my hubby all about what I learned and how exciting it was to see how WLS has changed the lives of these ladies. All he could say is that the doctor has not done lap bands before. I told him it was because he wanted to wait until it was in the US for a while and that there was long term evidence of the benefits of it (He even addressed this in the seminar). He even studied under the doctor that brought it to the US. He has trained in performing the lap band surgery and does all his surgeries laproscopicly (sp?). I told hubby this and still all he could do was nit pic. It really put a downer on my mood. I tried to explain to him that I know that the doctor is just now offering it and I have done research in his background. He has been doing bariatric surgeries for years and this is the only thing he does. He is a very hands on doctor and is really supportive in your recovery and during and after your weight loss journey. When I initially told hubby that I was going to do the lap band I thought he was supportive. I told him I've done research and was not going into this with my eyes closed. I mean why would anybody just wake up one day and decide that they were going to have surgery. I hate having surgery. I don't like being put under but I've decided that this is the best thing for me in the long run. I just found out today that I have border line high cholesterol and high blood pressure. I'm trying not to get angry at him because I know it's his way of being worried and trying to watch out for me but he also needs to trust in my decision and put trust in my doctor. I have trust in him and if I didn't trust his skills and his abilities to do the surgery successfully I WOULD NOT be going to him. Even today I told my mother what I am going to do and she even laid into me about how I'm going to have to change and hinted at I could do it on my own. If I could have done it on my own I wouldn't be overweight to begin with. But I know my mother means well and loves me but at that moment I was just looking for someone to be excited about how I am taking charge of my health and doing something positive. Seems like the only people I'm getting it from these days are my close friends. :thumbs_up: I'm not going to let these things change my mind about the surgery. Now I'm more determined then ever to have it done. If I have to have it with no support then so be it. I'm doing this for me anyways.

Hi!, I just read your post and it moved me. Listen, I thank God every day that my family (mom, dad, brother) are so happy and supportive on my upcoming surgery. They give me all the positive feedback and it is great. But through this journey, I have learned who are my true friends. Those people that I thought were my "friends" really couldn't understand what I was doing. With this, please keep in mind, that you have to do what you need to do to be healthier both physically and mentally. Please keep your head up high and make sure the doctor is good to do this.

Take care!

Paty

Hey Girl,

The whole husband thing i TOTALLY understand. My husband was against it and i finally pulled it out of him why he was so against the surgery. He told that he didnt want me to do this surgery bc he didnt want anything to happen to me. Maybe this is what your husband is feeling too. I think that husbands who trully love their wives should feel scared of this surgery, bc they love us so much that they are scared something bad will happen and they wont have us anymore.:thumbs_up: After i finally got that out of my husband and i explained the surgery to him in detail....he completely gets it! I know hes still scared but im kinda scared myself. :thumbup:Maybe this will help you understand his point of view.

Mandi Jo

Oh yeah and if you need anyone to talk to....I AM HERE FOR YOU!!! :biggrin2:

Mandi Jo

Girl

When you make your mind up about something everything and every body tries to change it. As for your husband you just have to decide to do somethings for yourself. I was banded on 05 20 2008. My husband never really said much. He thought that I wasnt going to do it because it took me so long to do. But he never really said that he didnt want me to do it. He has been ok so far. But the rest of my family has given me crap about it.

My sister who is one year younger than me kept sayin " well you know what happened to Kanye West Mama" . And she even cried when I made the descision to go ahead and do it. My mother was just saying "you can do it on your own." The thing is I know that I can do it on my own but I just can't keep it off on my own. I lost sometimes 70 to 80 pounds and each time I just put it back on. The band will help me keep it off.

You just have to learn to pray and make up your mind and say this is what is best for me. I did not come to my descision easily . I began this process about 11 months ago. I made up my mind that this is what is best for me and I wasnt going to let anyone take away from or take away the descision that i made.

I will be praying for you on your jounery

I will say this and then i will call it a night...

Ask your husabnd and your mom

"Is it better for me to stay this way and lose wieght and gain it back and run the risk of having diabettes and highblood pressure and having a heart attack or stroke

or

going under anesthesia for 45 minutes(my doc took 39 min to complete my actual surgery) and living the rest of your life and healthier and better you.....

You do you!

I'm not letting the conversation with my hubby deter me from my goal of having it done and hitting my goal weight. I guess I thought since I was excited about it that he should be too but I need to realize that not everyone is going to be so gungho about it as I am. Also he needs to realize that this is not something that I'm taking lightly. We just need to be open and honest about everything during this journey if not then neither one of us will get what we need which is for me an awesome support system and for him a healthier, happier wife.