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I Feel Pretty…Oh So Pretty…or HONEST, Those Aren't Mine!

blogs/blog-0780204001368990934.jpgOk, I might get blackballed and lose my MAN CARD for admitting this, but here goes. I was cleaning out the closet, looking for smaller pants to wear. I started rummaging for something that would fit, found a nice pair to try on. They were a PERFECT fit, better than any pants I've put on. Looked good in the mirror too! All that walking is shaping my butt up! Did I really say that last line?

 

Up till recently, you could lean me up against a flat wall and there’d be no gaps anywhere from the top of my back to my calves. My butt was so flat… How flat was it? It was often mistaken for an end table when I lay on the floor.

 

I looked at the tags only to find that they weren’t men’s pants at all - but a ladies size 16 that got left behind from a previous girlfriend! They must’ve mistakenly gotten mixed in with the tons of other pants and shirts that were put in the “I’ll be able to wear that again someday,” wishful thinking pile.

 

For the MAN Committee, I know you have no knowledge of this, but, a 16 is the 1X Women's Plus Size according to Overstock.com. And I DID have to look that up; it didn’t come from memory or previous experience wearing women’s clothing! (So MAN Committee, please take that into account when voting.)

 

This means that I now have the body of a woman with voluptuous hips!

 

P.S. Blackball or not, I'm KEEPING the pants!!

 

Keep Pimpin that sleeve!

13 Comments

Recommended Comments

TES

Gastric Sleeve Patients

Just remember that they zip on the opposite side!

joatsaint

Gastric Sleeve Patients

Just remember that they zip on the opposite side!

Silly me, here I was thinking the zipper thing was a new fad in jeans!

CharmingTortoise

Gastric Sleeve Patients

I'm so jealous, I'm in 18's right now and can't wait to get in to 16's. Congratulations on your voluptuous hips!?!

SmilingEyes

Gastric Sleeve Patients

would love to see you runway those pants and show off your hips!

MIJourney

Gastric Sleeve Patients

A co-worker came was leaving work one day (changes to scrubs at work) and mentioned he didn't know where his wife picked them up but he really liked the jeans he found in the closet. Thought they were for him. We saw the LB on the label and said, yeah those are from Lane Bryant:) He still liked them!

joatsaint

Gastric Sleeve Patients

A co-worker came was leaving work one day (changes to scrubs at work) and mentioned he didn't know where his wife picked them up but he really liked the jeans he found in the closet. Thought they were for him. We saw the LB on the label and said, yeah those are from Lane Bryant:) He still liked them!

Excellent! Now I don't feel so alone.

lyndeeboo

LAP-BAND Patients

Ha! Way to work that sleeve you sexy thang!!!

..But this post is WORTHLESS without a picture! Put up or shut up :)

belladona

Gastric Sleeve Patients

I love your posts they are inspirational yet hysterical.wear those jeans proud!! I would give 1/2 a pinky toe for a size 16 lol.

joatsaint

Gastric Sleeve Patients

Ha! Way to work that sleeve you sexy thang!!!

..But this post is WORTHLESS without a picture! Put up or shut up :)

Sorry, but I don't want to wind up on internet, like the guy in pic I used in this post! :-P

If I am going to have embarrassing photos of me on the web, it's gonna be a photo of me going commando while getting out of a low slung sports car. Yeah Baby!

NMJG

Gastric Sleeve Patients

This is hilarious. You really brightened my day.

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