A Weighting Game

I've been fat my whole life, my whole family is big, well not my mom, so I know there is a little me in here somewhere! I'm tired of fighting, the daily struggle, the depression, the hopelessness, I can do this alone no longer, I'm finally getting help.

I carry it well, but lets be honest, at 5'ft, and at one point 300 pounds, how exactly did I carry it at all? I'm luckier than most, I suppose.. no diabetes, no hypertension, nothing major except pretty severe sleep apnea, as if that alone isn't a major health hazard.

My Dr. added oxygen to my cpap, a yr or so ago, since, when I sleep my level drops to around 70, sometimes lower. That alone was killing me... so many risks associated with oxygen deprivation, to say the least.

I am beautiful, as I am, But, I have always wanted to be beautiful, and tiny... and healthy, I am sad, and I feel terribly selfish, that I am having this done, when my 2 daughters, are quite heavy as well.

I had hoped that with the struggle they see me go through, they would have made some better choices,

but sadly, no. Both are binge eaters, bored eaters, and sneaky eaters. I haven't made munching easy for them, but seems that they find a way.

I hope I can help, in some way more.

I don't want them to weight as long as I have before getting healthy, and living happy,

as my struggles have been a work in process, so is my story......

To Be Cont...