If I Could Kick My Own @$$ Right Now I Would!

So my whole thing this week was I was going to go on a liquid diet before vacation to kind of balance out all the potential crap I'm going to eat next week. Well, yesterday was WONDERFUL! Not! Two protein shakes and a fight with the dbf gave me the worse migraine I had since before my surgery! I was so nauseous I wanted to throw up but I couldn't, ugh. So I took two advil and closed the blinds in my family room. Okay so two protein shakes, a handful of pretzels because I thought it was my blood sugar that was off, then a packet of cream cheese at Dunkin' Donuts because I thought it was STILL my blood sugar! I get home and eat a whole bag of......wait for it......steamed broccoli with pesto (bad!) and mayo (worse!!!!) but I did feel somewhat better. I was pissed too because I didn't get to excercise. So there's kicks in the @$$ parts 1, 2 and 3!

I feel like I'm failing, I've been doing so good 30 lbs in 3 months is nothing to sneeze at! But now I feel like I'm sabotaging myself! I hate it!

Today started off fine, I had my usual egg white omlette with veggies and cheese lunch was a disaster. I had half of a tuna sandwich with some steak fries. I feel so bad eating those, I suck at this! Stop the sabotage!!!!! At least I know that for dinner I made something healthy and I'm going to a new excercise class tonight with my friend from high school. This class is free for me (tonight) I need to see if I can make it from the train station. If I like it I'll sign up for it. If I don't I think I'm going to sign up at a studio that has Zumba classes 7 days a week and go on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Tomorrow I'm re-doing the week of c25k that I did last week since I missed a run Monday I probably lost a lot of endurance.

Okay, so I f***** up today. Now a game plan for tomorrow. Breakfast: egg white omlette NO CHEESE! While I'm there, I'll get my lunch. They have Kashi cereal and milk. I'll have that for lunch and not even have a chance to meet up with the fries again tomorrow. Lunch: Kashi high protein cereal with skim milk. Dinner: Quorn cutlets with pesto and mozzarella. C25k after work. Don't give up!!!!

I don't even want to think about getting on the scales Thursday. If I gained I'll do a liquid diet Thursday and Friday just to get some weight off. I think I would've been okay if I didn't have the migraine from hell. It's such an excuse, but every time I get a fill I'm on a liquid diet and I'm fine no headaches or anything!

I need all the support I can get today!

Buuuuuttt on a nsv kind of note, I was quite proud of myself at the grocery store on Sunday. I was going to get the ingredients for my dinner this week and I wanted something to snack on since I was stressed. I'm not going to lie I grabbed tortilla chips, had a couple of handfuls with salsa and cheese and threw the rest out. Before this, I would've gotten cookies, ice cream, salty crunchy crap, but none of that interested me (I didn't even go into the Easter aisle damn Cadbury eggs!).

Also, I packed some healthy snacks in my luggage for my lay over Saturday. I packed a tuna salad to go kit (it's 200 calories) I'm also going to get some Ritz snackerfuls or whatever they're called and some rice crackers. Maybe some candy idk I'm going to see how I do food wise this week.

I'm just hoping my next fill is going to get me into the "green zone" I feel like I'm close. The band is definetly still there!