August 22, 2011

Here is where I am at the moment. Today at 6:30 I will be going to a Seminar with my husband. At first I was very distant to the idea and had all these opinions, that I later found to not be true. I like the fact that it is a gradual lose unlike gastric, which I thought of several years ago. That the port is not outside your body rather inside and that if I was to become pregnant it is something that is easily adjustable to my needs. I want to eat healthy, I want to exercise, I want to tie my shoes without hyperventaliating, and I want to go to a restaurant and sit in the damn booth without a fat pillow showing up on the table. I dont see lap band, as others may, as a "easy" way to lose weight. I know that there is going to be struggles and there is going to be determination and constent motivation on my part. I see the lap band as my inner, will you, self there 24-7 reassuring me that it can and will get done because unlike gyms and friends/family support the lap band wont go anywhere, its there and will always be there with me. I have to do this for not only the health of any possible children but MY future. The future with my husband, family, and self. I diserve to be completley happy and its about damn time I get on the right path.