Self Sabotage

Okay, so I was banded June 11, 2009. I did it because one of the girls I work with got banded and she did really well with it and lost a ton of weight. I have in the past exercised and ate right to lose weight. The problem is that I am of the mind set that once I lose a certain amount of weight that I can go back to old habits. I know that's the wrong way to think, but the hope was always in the back of my mind. Everytime, I start doing really well and lose a lot of weight, I sabotage my efforts by eating high calorie, high fat food. Yes, chocolate, ice cream, chips, and other junk. Skipping meals and not eating the necessary proteins. I realize, that it is all in my psychology. I need to change the way I feel. I need to free myself from the fear of succeeding and treat myself like I'm worth it. I'm almost at my year mark and I've only lost 49 Lbs. which I don't begrudge, but I know I could have lost more. I haven't exercised one day and I have cheated whenever the motivation was absent. It will be an uphill battle to change the way I think. But I'm going to try and start a new exercise regimen and join a support group. I figure, as long as I know that I am the problem, I know what to do.