This past Thursday I had my psych appt. As I sat in my truck finishing up the last few pages of the booklet I was told to fill out before my appointment, I wondered what I was walking into since I have seen posts that describe it as a simple discussion with a doctor and others as a series of tests. The waiting room was filled with other hopeful WLS patients and after a 10 minute wait I was weighed (lost 6 lbs!- the good) and taken back to an office with the shrink and a student who was there for observation. (I said I didnt mind) She reviewed my questionaire and pretty much asked me questions based on my answers. It was simple enough but based on my very honest answers, she suggested I seek counseling based on my past history of depression for at least 6 months after surgery despite the fact I told her my depression was situational and I am very excited about the surgery. She also suggested I return to taking medication I had been prescribed (and honestly never took) and told me she wanted me to have whoever I decided to see to call her. I guess to confirm that I had followed her instruction. She told me she would recoommend that I get the surgery based on the fact I seem to have educated myself enough about the process, but I think her assessment was based more of how SHE felt about what I had shared with her and now how I was telling her about how I felt. She was nice enough but I did not totally agree with her suggestions. (the bad) Seeing someone wasnt the problem since I decided to visit a counselor I had in the past that I had grown to really like and who I know had battled her own weight problems. Taking the meds however was not something I wanted to do since I never really took the prescribed medications. The next day, however, I got up and took one of the little blue pillsbefore I went to work figuring it may be a preventive measure for the depression she said many patients sufffer from after surgery. Within a half hour of arriving at work, I felt very sleepy. An hour after that I felt angry and cranky.:thumbup: Within a half hour I felt my emotions going haywire and I started to cry:crying:. Realizing something was wrong, I went to my best friend and simply asked her to help me because something was wrong. She calmed me down, I returned to my desk and minutes later started to have a panic attack. My husband eventually was called to pick me up and I went home. I cried in the car all the way home and by the time I calmed down really felt depressed. :sad: The rest of my Friday was spent in the bed trying to sleep off the drug that was supposed to "help" me. On Saturday I woke up with a migrane from hell and ended up laying around for the better part of the morning. By the time I felt well enough to get out of bed, I was starving and ended up eating like it was my last meal. Needless to say, that really pissed me off (with myself) when I realized I had totally lost control. I am not quite sure what happened, but I am guessing because my chemical levels were fine, taking a drug that is supposed to change those levels, sent my body into a frenzy. I had called my PCP but she was on vacation and her back up called me back after I had left work. I will call back on Monday.

One thing for certain...no more drugs until I see my PCP. If my PCP agrees with the shrink, I will let her handle it because its possible she can give me something else or a very low dosage.

My willingness to do whatever it takes to comply with suggestions of medical professionals in an effort to get my surgery has made me more open to doing things I wouldnt have otherwise, because failure is NOT AN OPTION for me. But that episode on Friday has reminded me that no one knows me the way I know myself and I have to have more faith in God and myself to be a success. When I first started this journey, I prayed about it and said, if it isnt in God's plan, it will not simply happen. Since then I have had successes, failures, doubts and fears that have made me wonder. But on Friday, as a friend held me as I sobbed like a baby, she said a prayer in my ear and it brought me some peace and when I look back today, a reminder that no matter what happens on this journey, in the end, its all part of God's plan so I only need to have faith.

i feel the pain... I take meds for depression and thats soemthing my surgeon said " that my depression has to be in control before i can have surgery" well... they keep puttin my date off so now.... im more depressed! i have to do a support support for a year after my surgery. soo..... i feel your pain about the meds... but i would take care of it now before they say u cant have surgery tilll its controled... but keep your head up and just remember : your not the only one! take care!

I too haven had the battle with depression meds. Some have made me gain weight, some made me a woman from hell! Others just didn't work! You will do fine! I hated my shrink too! Take care!

Ruth