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2 years pot op

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post op 2 years

hey everyone, i am currently 2 years post op and wouldnt change it. iam down 93lbs which is like a another whole human :-p my journey has been far from easy. at 18years old i weighed in at 286lbs i was boarder line diabetic. it was a little bit of a wake up call and thats when i went to see my doctor. i was a size 26 in jeans and a 3xl in shirts. Today iam a size 15 in jeans , a medium in my victoria sweat pants =) and a xl in shirts. With all the positives said i still have the " fat girl mentality" i still feel like iam that 286lb girl from 2 years ago. one of my close friends said to me " you call your self fat more now then you did when you were really fat". Honestly shes right. Dont get me wrong i am very proud of how much i have lost but those thunder thighs and muffin top seem to not want to go away. When i look in the mirror i still see that fat girl. i dont know if anyone else is having this problem. its like my mind hasnt caught up with my weight loss. There are days i just cry and say " i hate being fat" its such a struggle to find an outfit for the day. its almost like it was easier when i was big i was in denial of how big i was now that i looked back at old pictures im like oh my god i was that big. It takes a mental toll. i came to this site because im sure my friends , boyfriend and parents are sick of hearing it and i needed people who could relate to what im goin through. its hard to explain to my mom whos 5 foot 110lbs who calls her self fat. go figure i guess it doesnt matter what weight you get to your always going to find something wrong with yourself. I just want to know if iam the only one going through this mental roller coaster. Thanks for letting me ramble on =)
bandedbritt

bandedbritt

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