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It's is a Secret...

SO, I am having this battle within myself... I don't want to tell anyone that I am having the band done. WHY? I don't know, well I hate that for an answer, "I don't know" that is not any sort of an answer. I am going to try and answer that WHY? I think it is because I am ashamed and concerned about how people will look at me. I at times feel this is the easy way out, which I know it isn't. I have not been over weight my entire life, in fact it has been really about 4-5 years. And even though I am overwieght, I am still very active. I remember what one of my husbands friend said to me not that long ago, "You are a big girl but I would still take you hiking/camping, you would be able to keep up." I thought how rude. But that is when I realized that I was in fact big. I wore a size 14 at the time. Now after the baby I am a size 16-18. I feel trapped and this is the only thing I can think of to fix it. Diets and the gym are not working, diet pills are not the fix, I want a long lasting healthy lifestyle. I am afraid to tell people like my Mom, who is also over weight. I know that she will judge me. I suppose it is better to be judge for being proactive than not doing anything at all. I am not one of those people that eat a lot, she says, "I can't believe how big you are you eat like a bird." Well night shift for over 10 years had something to do with it. But I finally broke down and told a close friend. She was very supportive and helpful. My husband of course knows and he is also very supportive. It is just this little thing in my head not allowing me to open up to others. Maybe it is a defence mechanism? My surgery date is coming up July 23 and I am nervous but excited as well. I can't wait to start my new life, being healthy and doing what is right for me. It is about time I start to worry about me, I don't think I have ever really done that. It has always been about helping others. I just realized that as I wrote, thank you.

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I would kill for a soda...

I think I would Kill for a coke right about now! That has been the hardest thing for me, the food yes I feel hungry but I can drink a protein shake and be fine or broth etc. But seriously I want something more than water.... I am curious did everyone give up soda all together even after the month or so post op or does anyone drink diet soda oppose to regular? I have a friend who had gastric bypass and she drinks soda like crazy and she is doing great... is it just me that thinks I can't? I understand why the soda isn't good for me right now, healing and all but really...

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Advice...

I am having my lap band on the 23 of July on August 3 (12 days post op) Some friends are coming to Chicago to see us, and they are concerned that I will not be able to walk and get around. I told them I would be fine in that regard but the eating part is different. I will not be eating like the rest of them however that is on me but I should still be able to do everything else. Can anyone tell me how realistic I am or I am not being? I know everyone is different but seriously I think this will be OK. Maybe not the weekend following the procedure but 12 days after....should be no problem. 4 1/2 months ago I had an emergency c-section and was out of bed the next day, cleaning the room...a little OCD I know. But that is major abdominal surgery this is not...

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Tomorrow is the Day

It is finally here, tomorrow is the big day and I am even more nervous than I was before, I hate to see how I am tomorrow. I have been on clear liquids all day and I am ok a little headache but OK, I think it is mostly from other concerns. I am getting some stuff together in the event they keep me over night. I was told I would be going home tomorrow late afternoon so we will see. I am trying to keep busy, baby is taking a nap the house is clean, I am getting myself ready before baby wakes up to go to a retirement party for one of my husbands fellow co-workers. I am just going to drink water and maybe some ice tea. I am just so anxious to get this process over still not sure if it is the right thing to do? I have never entered into something so important with so many issues. I usually work them out way before this point. I know things will be OK, and I am not the only one who had done this, and I am tired of the way things are and I like to think that I am proactive and this is the right thing to do. YES! it is... I think... tee hee I sound so silly. WISH ME LUCK - HERE I COME!

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Day 2 Post-OP

I did it! I came home yesterday, we choose to stay over night because my blood sugar was very high and they gave me two different types of insulin, I didn't want to get home and have a situation with my blood sugar being to low and then have to get back to the hospital. I also thought I could rest, which didn't happen at all, the nurse that night was not very responsive, maybe she was having a bad night, I don't know , nor do I care that isn't my problem. Sounds rough but that is what it is. That was the only negative thing about my experience so far. And if that is the worst thing I am doing GREAT. I feel like I have been kicked really hard in my stomach and I do have some gas discomfort. I am big on choosing from pain or discomfort, discomfort isn't pain, while it can be uncomfortable it isn't the same thing. Like playing sports, are you hurt or are you injuryed? Two different things. So, that is all, I am proud of myself for listening to my ques and knowing when I am full. I am being extra careful because I don't want to get sick, if anything, I know I need to drink more water, I felt a little weak and dizzy this morning but I think that is because I was a little on the dry side. I have a wonderful husband who is making me do my IS at least 8 times a day, which is wonderful for my lungs and asthma. Over all I feel really good. Before I started the meals I was at 263 the day of the surgery I was 249.5 so down, 13.5 pounds, I know I have a long way to go until I reach my goal weight but this is the first step. I am trying to take one bite of my elephant at a time... tee hee. We are going to get the baby up from her nap and go for a walk. I was up and walking in the room when I was able and then the halls that same afternoon, WALK WALK WALK...you will feel so much better. Even if you don't want to, if you can you need to! We Can Do It~

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Thank you

Thank you to everyone for your kind words and support. I received a phone call that my surgery time has been moved up so we have to be at the hospital at 0530 (was 0830) and the procedure will be at 0730 (was 1030)....Oh my goodness... I am really getting nervous, the house is clean I have things put away everything is in order... yes a little OCD... My Mom is coming in from Michigan sooner to watch our little Abigail. I think she is the reason why I am so nervous. I know nothing will happen, but there is always the "what if" and being a RN doesn't help much. I am trying to quite my mind but nothing seems to be helping except cleaning. I will post as soon as I am able... thank you again. God Bless XOXO

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I just got my day for surgery

I got my day for the lap-band, it is July 23, 2010. I am a little nervous, but I know this is the first and right step for my success. We just had a little baby, she is 4 months old and I think she is the reason why I am a little more nervous than I need to be. I know the risks are low, but there are still risks. I just ask myself does the risk out-weigh the benefit? The benefit is so much greater...to be healthy! I am also concerned about the "down" time is it really just about 3-4 days? And is it difficult afterwards, or is it all in your head.

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Day 5 Post-OP

I am doing pretty good, I am feeling hungry and have moved from the liquid diet to the more blended. I feel like I can eat but I want to take it slow. I do have some concerns and maybe someone out there has had this problem. I still seem to have a lot of gas. It is uncomfortable and I feel better when I can let it pass but will it ever get out of my body? I feel a little sore still on my left side but I can only imagine that is normal. I am trying to stay hydrated simply because I know how important it is.

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I feel rotten

Ok, so I feel just terrible:cursing:. I am on day 8 of my 15 day meal replacement program. We had friends from out of town come in and of course everyone wanted to go to dinner. I thought of that will not be too much trouble I will order an ice tea and say I am really just not hungry. Well my husband is like you will be fine it is ok to eat a little something, it was so tempting and of course what did I do...yes, had some I didn't have a lot just a few bites but I feel terrible, not that I ate something that I let myself down. It hasn't been very easy the last 8 days, the first 2-3 where the worse. This all happened over the weekend, I think it is ok,but I feel rotten. I am also certain I am not the only one who has had a bite or two during this time. I just want it to be successful and I hate letting myself down. I picked myself up and have been doing good so far this week. I am down nearly 9 pounds from the day I started the meal replacements. And they are not so bad really. I thought they would be much worse. Any words of wisdom for my up and coming week would be apperciated. I have my lap band on the 23rd. :thumbup:

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How do you eat an elephant???

2 more days and I have my procedure! I am still really nervous but I know that everything will be OK. It is just such a large change. I am a size 18 right now, 5 months after having a baby, I was a size 14 before I had her, I am up to 255 pounds, the only time I was heavier was at 9 months pregnant and weighed 298. I couldn't believe it, I didn't even recognize myself in the pictures, Who is that? I had a lot of complications, and I didn't really eat for two, seriously I was so careful. I was about 218 when I got pregnant. My OB doctor says that a gain of 37 pounds is normal and I should be able to lose it, on my own. The fact is that I have been told that I have NASH and if I was to ever have another baby the weight could again be an issue. I am tired, while this has not been a problem my entire life I have been over weight long enough, it is time to get serious and this is the tool that will help! Nothing else has, not for the lack of trying. But somewhere inside I say, what if this doesn't work? It has too... I am 5'8 and my goal weight is 160-165 that is 90 pounds! 90 pounds, that is a lot of weight, my doctor says that is a good start but maybe 140? My husband says this when I am stuck with any sort of problems or road block and I think it is cute, "How do you eat an elephant?" the answer: One bite at a time, so the metaphor here is you take one step at a time until you reach your goal. Which is totally doable, I know this, XOXO

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Meal Replacement Day - 2

Ok so yesterday wasn't the best day, I felt terrible, had a headache and all I wanted to do was eat. I felt bad for my husband, because he felt guilty eating in front of me. It was hard, however the meal replacement isn't as bad as I thought it would be, but 15 days...YIKES. We are having friends visit from out of town, and what that usually means is "let's go to some of the great restaurants in downtown Chicago". I am going to pray for strength. It will be difficult but Ok. I am curious did anyone drink soda during this time? Also what about cream soups? Any suggestions will be grateful. Thank you and wish me luck! I just keep thinking ok this is what is best for me and my family. :smile2: Ok this is what is best for me and my family...I already said that, tee hee. All of your stories are very inspirational! xoxo

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1 week and counting

I have one week to go, next Friday by this time I will have had the procedure done! I am nervous but must admit this web site and all of your stories, posts, blogs and so on have helped! Everyone stories are so unique and different but they all have one common goal, to lose weight in order to be healthier and happier. So Thank you for all of the positive feedback. We can do this! :thumbup:

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I need help finding a doctor in NM

OMG...life has been so crazy! I had my surgery July 23 and then was scheduled a week and a half ago for my first fill which I had to cancel because my husband and I relocated to NM. My doctor didn't want to do the fill because I wasn't going to be there and thought it would be easier if I found a doctor here in Albuquerque, NM. so, I am wondering if anyone has any suggestions for a doctor. I have done some searches etc. however I would like to hear from people who actually have had contact with the doctors etc. If anyone can help please send suggestions. I will be truly grateful!

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