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Blog 95493

A blog by Drake alp

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1st fill after obstruction

Saw the doc today and got a fill. I gained 4# since last month. They weren't upset though and said I shouldn't beat myself up either. I guess when some folks get their fluid out, they really take advantage and over do it. I tried to stay focused although it was hard with the added stress of thinking I lost my band. I decided that I"m going to do 5 days of protein shakes. I haven't been feeling as good and I've been at basically the same weight for a month or two now, give or take a pound or two. Hopefully this will jump start my weight loss and I can start feeling better too. I did notice today after taking my vitamin and the 1st shake that it's almost like overloading my body - been feeling sick most of the day but I am sure this will wear off. Hope you are having a great week!

Drake alp

October 18, 2010

6

It's a false alarm - I'm just fine!

I'm mentally skipping on top of the clouds - I got good news today. My doctor went to the hospital to look at the esphogram (the one the radiologist used to tell me there was no pouch above my band and the band had turned.) My doc wanted to see for himself - not go off the radiologist report. Turns out the radiologist doesn't know what he's talking about. My band is PERFECT!! Safe, sound, well positioned and WORKING!! It's been a long 6 days waiting for an answer, but I couldn't be happier that all is just fine. Thank you for your support these last few days. Whew --- I'm glad this chapter is closed! Now...on to enjoy the ONEderland I reached and whittle some more weight away. I have an appt Monday with the doc and I'm not hungry so am feeling like no fill is in order. We'll see what he thinks. 18x# here I come!! God bless you all!! I hope you've had a good day and if not, that you've had the blessing of others holding you up. You are worth it - keep fighting! This is tough work but we will be rewarded!

Drake alp

October 13, 2010

8

It's been great until now

As you know from former blogs, it's been going great. I was banded on 6/24. At the beginning of my pre-op diet I weighed 242#. On 10/4 I hit 199#...finally below 200#! I love it! Unfortunately, I have bad news also. At about day 100 after surgery, I got what my doc is calling a total obstruction. I ate last Saturday and 4 hours later I went into extreme pain. 12 hours later I met my doctor at his office and he took out all my fluid. I haven't been hungry since then. I did have an esophogram which showed that my band has slipped - there is no pouch above it according to my radiologist. I am waiting to hear what my doc says before putting too much stock into that diagnosis. What I can tell you is thte last 2 days I've done pretty well, but both nights after I've eaten I've gotten super nauseated and there is a terrible pain in my stomach. Yesterday I was crying in fear of losing my band and becoming fat again. Tonight I'm almost crying because it hurts so bad inside my stomach. It feels like the band is super tight around the bottom of my esophogas. Lots of reflux too. My insurance only pays for one surgery a lifetime, so we'll see where this goes. Take it easy and keep looking forward. I'm posting this only really to help me process. I'm 44# and really happy to be under 200#. I wish you all the best. What I can say is I stuck to my program and didn't do the things I read on here from folks who are cheating. Know if it can happen to a person who is disciplined like me, then you have no room to cheat. It's just not worth it. Stay strong and fight the fight! Nothing tastes as good as skinny looks, as they say! :frown:

Drake alp

October 10, 2010

11

Bad news

I got my esphogram today with barium. Radiologist said there is no pouch above my band. He said it has slipped. He also said the band is not positioned the way the doctor wants it to be. However, I had my surgery at another hospital so he wanted to compare my post-surgery placement to today's pictures. He also said that sometimes when the swelling goes down the band can move back where it's supposed to. I'm not a doc and my intuition isn't buying that. Called my doc's office. Advice is there is nothing I can do so do not get worked up about it. The doc will call me Monday. Maybe the radiologist isn't seeing it correctly. I am really really sad. I am down to 198# and can fit into size 16. I don't have to go to the 'fat store' to buy really ugly clothes that I have come to hate the past 8 years. I joined a gym, was feeling positive, getting out again, and all my relationships are better. I felt like I had my life back. I don't want to go back to being 240 or my highest of 266. My goal is 140. I am only 58# away. I am under the 200's, which is when I felt my weight got out of control. I have been so good and so disciplined. I am tempted to go watch Lifetime, throw a pity party and cry Why me? I hear and read so much that people get away with and I wasn't even trying to test it. I would appreciate prayers. I don't know what is next. I'm generally a happy optimistic person but I'm in a dark place. Thanks for listening. Let it be used for good for someone.

Drake alp

October 8, 2010

4

It's a journey

It's been about 100 days since my surgery. I am down from 242# and hit onederland this week. Weighed in today at 198#. It's been 7 or so years since the weight began with a "1". I am so grateful! I'm curious how my band friends are doing. What's been going well? What have been your struggles? I'd really like to catch up with you all! What a blessing everyone on here has been. My overall journey has been tremendous. I did hit my first really bad situation last Saturday. I got a total obstruction. Don't know what I did. Ate chicken - I think I didn't chew well enough because I waited too long to eat. Anyway, I ate and 2 hours later took a nap. 2 hours after that, I woke up in extreme pain. I began throwing up and the pain continued to get worse. It hurt so badly I couldn't stand, walk, sit, or lay down without feeling pain. In fact, whenever I laid on my back or right side, I threw up. I didn't want to bother my doc at 8 pm when this started because I read on here that it can take a couple of hours to pass. I also took some advice and had papaya pills and pineapple juice - which didn't help. At 10 pm, I didn't want to bother anyone and as it got later, my pain got worse. I didn't sleep all night. I called my doc's answering service at 6:30 am. He's a great doc and saw me at 8 am Sunday morning in his office. He had to take all my fluid out. Said it was close - I almost lost my band. Very scary. Anyway, I came home, threw up another time, and then slept for 2 hours. When I woke up, I was not hurting - thank goodness! I go for an esphogram tomorrow morning to see if my band slipped. Doc wants to be sure it didn't before he fills me up. Please cross your fingers. I can't believe all has gone so well and I have one problem which escalates into a major situation. I've been very good and have had great results. I pray I will get good news. Hope you are all doing well! Peace and love.

Drake alp

October 8, 2010

8

I'ts been a while

Vacation and other things have taken me away from the computer alot lately. I'm interested in doing so many more things as the weight comes off. I feel better, my diabetes is in remission, my self esteem is higher, I no longer feel like my family should be embarrassed of my obesity (yes, there was a point that it was very painful -- in my mind only, never an issue with them). I actually went to the pool last Saturday during the prime of the day and laid out to get some sun. I also posted some pics of me from vacation on another site that anyone can see - friends, family, old high school classmates. Big step! As far as how I'm doing with eating, not bad. Not perfect but not bad. Since my first fill I'm not hungry 'almost all' of the time. When it's time to eat I am hungry. I don't feel full but I stop eating anyway - I throw leftovers in the trash, store them quickly, or if it's a family dinner I leave the table. I've been swimming at least 3 times a week for exercise. I need to start doing something specific to get my abs tightening up. On the victories, I've lost 33 lbs. Yesterday I went to put on pants for work and they were way too big. Yeah!! Those pants have been with me from 220-260 - and about 5 years. Glad to see them go!! Blood sugar was 84 yesterday fasting. All's good. If you are doing great, keep it up! If you are struggling, know that it happens to all of us. I had lost about 1# in the last 3 weeks and was feeling up about the progress overall, but frustrated to follow the program and be at a plateau. It's amazing what a 3# loss all of a sudden did for my optimism this week - and it made me even stronger on following the program with eating and exercise. As long as you are following your plan, you will have success. If you fall off the wagon, get back on. One day is not a show stopper - commit to not string 2 of those together though! Good luck and I thank everyone so much for sharing their stories. We're all helping each other succeed and get our lives back. Have an awesome weekend!

Drake alp

August 14, 2010

3

1st fill today

Got 3 cc's in a big band, and he told me never to ask again. So I won't. I agree it doesn't matter - doc said there's no way I'll run out of room in the band and everyone is different so counting numbers doesn't matter. He wants me to focus on what I can control - portions, food choices, exercise, etc. Can't argue with that! I was pretty nervous about the fill. Have read some stories about how it hurts, not being able to swallow, etc. So far so good at 8 hours into it. The numbing shot didn't really hurt - felt less painful than the prick to my finger to check my blood sugar (by the way, I'm still in remission - no metformin since before surgery and checking in with fasting numbers in the 70's on average.) The fill shot felt about the same as the numbing shot - again, no pain and less than the finger prick. He said I've done better than most with my weight loss since the surgery (of the patients he sees - all programs are different). That made me really happy and the will power I've executed worth it! GO ME! hahahaha... Hope you are having some GO YOU moments. Let's keep fighting the fight and working toward our goals. Doc jazzed me up when he said his next goal for me is the weight to begin with a ONE....I'm 213 today so 14 # to go. HERE I COME!!!

Drake alp

July 26, 2010

5

Today is my one month Band-iversary!

Wow - I can't believe it's been a month! I'm down 29# lbs (15 pre-op, 14 post-op). I'm 1# away from hitting my low recent weight in 2008. I'm 3# away from being my 2005 weight. When I look at the scale victories I can't deny what a life changer the band has been for me. I expect that continue. I've read others who have more experience than me and I know it won't be easy. So far I've had a lot more will power an determination than I knew I was capable of (a NSV!). Other NSVs include cleaning out my closet of any clothes bigger than 18's (I had some 22's in there, maybe a couple 24's). I also fit into my swimsuit and have been swimming each evening for exercise. I forgot how much I love the water - the fat and my self-consciousness have kept me from so many things I love. I hope this is the first of many new discoveries I will make as I take back my life! That's the sunny part of my feelings today. I also have another side that's a struggle. I am SO hungry. I go to my doc on Monday and I will probably get a fill from what I've been told. I've been wondering though, if I'm eating according to the plan, why has my weight loss slowed so much and how will a fill help because my caloric intake cannot be lowered. I chatted with the nutritionist yesterday because logically I couldn't make sense of all this. She wants me to have about 1,000 calories a day - up to 1200. I have a hard time getting there unless I do seafood, and I get really sick of seafood I eat so much of it. There are days that I get between 650 and 800 calories - many days a week. Plus, I'm exercising. She explained: right now my body is going through a metabolic change and once it adjusts to the lower caloric intake, I will lose again.
the fill will help me not be hungry all of the time - I will be more 'satiated'
she'll look at my food diary and give me some suggestions for how to get my calories to 1000 without increasing portion sizes (I'm at a loss right now with 4 oz servings!)
Even though I've lost 3 lbs between July 11 and July 24, they usually expect me to lose nothing between my 2 week and 4 week visits. I'm 5# down total during that time, so I will take that. Today I will be grateful for the band and trusting of the folks I entrusted with my care. I cannot argue with the amazing results of so many on here ---- it will work for me to. I resolve to stay strong and reset my expectations to 1-2# a week. Thanks for listening and walking on this journey with me! The support means a lot. And no one can understand like the folks on this site. Have a great weekend.

Drake alp

July 24, 2010

4

Hope

I have hope. I think. Looked it up and it means - 1 : to desire with expectation of obtainment 2 : to expect with confidence. Yes, that's it - HOPE. Haven't had that for a long time. So thankful for my LAP-BAND® and my LBT friends - you're awesome support! I'm feeling so much better - getting my energy back, eating well now, and feeling good about the weight loss and weight shift (I get measured in a couple of weeks so am real sure there are NSV there.) Cleaned out my closet this weekend. Put the 'fattest' clothes together to the side - won't be wearing those ever again. Now everything in my closet fits. Also organized my shoes --- funny how my feet gained weight and I'm newly fitting into some of my old smaller shoes again. Fun!

Drake alp

July 19, 2010

3

Slipping into a routine

I was banded 6/24. My dr said I'd lose about 10 more lbs before my next appt on 7/26. That would be quite a slowdown for me, I thought. I had lost 15# on the 19 day pre-op diet. I'm a little over 3 weeks post-op and have lost 13#. Eight of them came off quickly at the end of the first week following surgery. Last week I lost 2 and this week it was 3 (almost 4 but I don't round the decimals up or down on my scale). I am happy with 3 because I had 2 nights away from home due to a work function, so for 3 days I had to eat the food provided -- without a scale or planning. I did great and it built my confidence. I also increased my calories this week. Prior to this week I couldn't get over 800 calories on dr's orders of 4 oz of food 3x daily, plus 2 protein shakes. Every day this week I was between 900-1000 calories, averaging about 90 grams of protein. This is also an increase from 45-60 grams a day. What did I deduce from this? It's ok to have some calories, and to be sure and get my protein. I think those are key for me going forward. I am getting curious about the fill. My dr doesn't put anything into it during surgery so 7/26 will be our first discussion. I do get hungry between meals but I can't tell if it's head hunger. When I'm distracted, like during work, I don't think about eating as much as it's not as hard to control. The evenings and weekends are challenging. I am curious about the 'sweet spot' that others have found, and what the right balance is between will power (the band still requires work!) and fills (the band is a tool that is ok to leverage for help).

Drake alp

July 17, 2010

4

Couple of successes

I lost 2 lbs last week. I know that's the norm and I should feel lucky to be losing; I will admit that it's a huge slowdown and was tough to keep believing that there wasn't something wrong with me. I did struggle with those fears coming back that I am the only one this won't work for. I am happy to say that despite those struggles, I made it through! I stuck to the program and while I weakened in belief at times, I leaned on the support here to "keep believing!" The stories here are inarguable -- I am so impressed by the successes that folks have had and how they are grounded and still here to help new folks like me. Thank you to everyone who provided encouragement - some I knew because you posted on the blog or sent me a note, others that motivated me have no idea -- I read posts and success stories and I'm equally as grateful for those. I was gone today over 12 hours for work. I haven't put a day that long in since before surgery (2 wks post op last Thurs). I don't have all my stamina back yet, but I am getting there! And I am so much more calm and at peace. I also had a couple of victories today. I crossed my legs during an all day meeting -- without having to use my hands to lift my leg up. Doesn't sound like a big deal but I love that my stomach is not inhibiting my movement anymore. I also went shopping because I needed clothes that fit better for the work commitment I have this week. I bought size 16 for the first time in at least 5 years! And definitely the first time I've been happy about it - last time I was on the way up and way out of control. Wishing you a very good week. Keep the faith - you are doing great because you are here; nothing beats the support that banders share!

Drake alp

July 13, 2010

3

Diabetes II remission

I'm not sure what the medical parameters are to say officially that my Diabetes is in remission, but the news is great so far. Prior to the pre-op diet on June 5, I was taking 1,000 mg of metformin per day (with last meal). The blood work I had done in April showed a fasting glucose of 107. They told me not to take metformin the day before surgery and when they checked my fasting glucose the day of surgery it was 76. Wow! That's the first time I can remember I've had a fasting number under 100 (100-124 = pre-diabetic/insulin resistant; 125 and over = diabetic are the medical standards I've been told). I have not taken metformin since prior to my surgery on June 24. I've continued to monitor my blood sugar and the low numbers continue!! This morning my fasting number was 75. I go to my family doctor in a few weeks and she wants me to bring my meter so we can discuss. I got down to my current weight 2 years ago through diet and exercise and my metformin was still needed - just reduced to 750 mg a day. Of course, when I put 30 lbs back on I needed the 1,000 again. So grateful for my health. Besides looking better, getting around easier, feeling better about myself --- I'm going to live longer thanks to this surgery! I knew it would resolve the Diabetes but I didn't know it would do it PRIOR to surgery!

Drake alp

July 11, 2010

6

First restaurant experience

So it's been over a month since I've eaten 'normal' food. 4 weeks on liquid, and now a week into pureed. Working toward soft foods which I start soon. I had my first lunch appointment today for work. Was really nervous to not have the comfort of my planning and my scale (yes, I weigh or measure everything I eat.) I ordered chili from Applebee's - no toppings. Chewed slowly - no water for 30 mins afterwards. Remembered to set the straw aside. A success! The waiter looked at me like I was crazy when I asked for a container to put the rest of the chili in. I'm sure he throws that amount away routinely! I have 2 overnights away from home next week, and 3 days where I'll need to eat the meals provided. I don't know how I'm going to make 3 oz last for 3 hours during the world class dinners we'll enjoy. I am determined to do it, and if you have had success with this, I'd appreciate some tips!

Drake alp

July 9, 2010

9

25% of target weight loss achieved!

I made it down the last lb. today to achieve my 25% lost goal. Very excited about that! 25 lb gone - now at 217. Next goal is to break in the 200's. Haven't been there since 2004 or before. Would like to achieve before my next dietician appt on 9/1. However, at a pace of 2 lbs a week, I'm setting the goal for 9/17. Either way will be victory and what i love about the band is I AM IN CONTROL. It doesn't come back unless I chose for it to by my choices. It feels great to be able to know that the scale can be counted on to go DOWN! I hear on my program there's a plateau so that's why I am so excited about the lb finally coming off. Took a week. Dietician said after 4 weeks liquid diet, now that I'm having pureeds the body will hold onto the carbs. I'm going through a 'metabolic shift.' Here we go!! Enjoy your day and if you are down, know that you CAN do it and everyone here is SUPPORTING you. If you are up, leave a note of encouragement for someone. Posting here is mainly for myself so I can log my journey, but I can't tell you the lift I get from newbies and seasoned bandsters when they share their successes and encouragement. It's cool to hear positivity from others and it's invaluable on this journey! Thanks for reading and listening! :smile2: Make it a great day!

Drake alp

July 8, 2010

6

Another step forward!

I love meeting with Laura, my dietician. The meeting this morning went great. I am 2 weeks post-op tomorrow and I was concerned about (1) hunger that has come on recently, and (2) the amount of calories, proteins, and carbs I'm eating. For the program I'm in, hunger at 2 weeks means that I healed properly. She said it means "I did everything right." :frown: Made me feel so good - I have totally committed to this and some days have been hard but I'm winning the battle day by day! I can start doing some band work and it's ok to do the walking in our neighborhood that I so love. Just no abs! I've gone for years not WANTING to do abs and now someone is telling me not to. I'm sure we'll get to those soon enough --- no doubt they will need some attention. I chatted with her about how my mix has changed since surgery. On pre-op I was having 75% protein and hitting about 900 calories a day. Since going on pureed I'm averaging 600 or so a day with about 40-50% protein. More good news - for me, that's right where they want me to be. I see her in 8 weeks. I laughed and once again reminded her to 'take a look at me now!' because there's nowhere to go but DOWN and next time she sees me I will be SMALLER. She always laughs but I haven't let her (or myself) down yet! I go back in 2 weeks. With as much hunger as I have, I'm guessing I will get a fill. I'm making the transition to eating pureeds only 3 times a day. That's going to be tough. But I get to go from 2 oz. to 3 oz. Just had my first 3 oz of chili and it was filling. That's a very positive sign. I'll be doing Carnation Instant Breakfast mix in between if I'm hungry. Goal is to get 2-3 of those down per day in addition to the (3) 3 oz servings of pureeds. Upcoming goals: 25% of weight gone by this Friday. I'm 1 lb. away. Under 200# by next visit with Laura in 8 weeks. That's 19#s I'll need to lose. Hope everyone out there is doing great no matter what phase of the process you are going through. Make it a great day!!

Drake alp

July 7, 2010

2

With healing comes hunger?

I had surgery 6.24.10. I've had a really great experience and am very glad I took this step, although I was really questioning myself right before my surgery date. Just panic I guess. I started pureed food this weekend. Really glad to have something that requires a bowl and a spoon! I did the pre-op diet for 19 days and then the liquid post-op diet with no cheating (really proud of myself - never imagined I had that will power!) Anyway, today is the first day that I feel my hunger is out of control. I've lost 24 lbs since 6.5.10 and have been journaling what I've been eating. I'm following the doc's orders to a tee but the 2 oz. at a time of food is not filling me up. I am watching the clock for 60 minutes when I can eat again. Wondering if my stomach healing and the swelling being reduced is giving me less 'restriction' naturally and that's why I am hungry?

Drake alp

July 5, 2010

3

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