Can I get pregnant after eating chicken strips three days out from surgery while listening to Michael Jackson music? Inquiring minds want to know.

I wanna know: If you're going the "donkey route" in MX, how are the fills??

Okay, wait... you talkin' donkey "fills" or band fills? Cuz hey, if he can push my chicken strips down, I'll be a happy buck-toothed camper.

Crap, I was afraid of that.

What if I swallow some spermicide first?

Well, that might work, but be sure and have the spermicide with some more extra crispy chicken.

Just add Kool-Aid and Everclear - no worries. Be sure to strain out the fur. It's wicked bad for the band.

Oh gawd, fur balls and the band. I had to quit licking my kitty for that very reason. Now he pisses on all my stuff cuz he really misses it, but I just couldn't take the heaving and hair clumps. Had a few episodes at the mall that I just can't talk about.

Okay, wait... you talkin' donkey "fills" or band fills? Cuz hey, if he can push my chicken strips down, I'll be a happy buck-toothed camper.

No, drink the pickle juice with the spermicide and that will push the chicken strips down.

Dirty donkey shows are definitely worth more dinero. The disenfectant may hurt your band. You might want to see your surgeon before you try something like that! However, the pickle juice might come in handy as a disinfectant and since you are already eating pickles the juice obviously won't hurt your band.

What if I just swallow straight everclear? Heck, may even be able to hold it in my mouth "during," but does it burn the donkey? Don't need him getting all kicky and stuff... I don't have that many teeth left.

Yea that projectile vomiting at the mall can be bad.

WARNING:

Never, ever, not even once, mix pickle juice and donkeys. It will cause the donkeys to learn to type and post crazy things on LBT. Further, you will never get pregnant unless you convince Ronald McDonald to feature donkey/possum burgers in his Mexico restaurants. Stay clear of the ponky juice!

Plain can hook you up with this new product called aspray. It's what got him pregnant - good stuff apparantly - only a few small forest creatures were harmed in the making of each 1 oz.

Okay, wait... NOT wanting to get pregnant -- ESPECIALLY if my kid will be half ass-- er, donkey. I mean, could you imagine the questions at the local PTA??

KTORK - I don't know who you think YOU are but nobody appreciates a know it all.!

Dirty donkey shows are definitely worth more dinero.

Oh really and what makes you the expert?

The disenfectant may hurt your band. You might want to see your surgeon before you try something like that!

What do you have a medical degree now - what qualifies you to decide whether this is sound advice?

However, the pickle juice might come in handy as a disinfectant and since you are already eating pickles the juice obviously won't hurt your band.

Again - I don't think she ever asked for your sarcasm - if you do not have something constructive to say - get a life, a possum or some chicken lips of your own dammit!

Everclear is always a good choice.

No, drink the pickle juice with the spermicide and that will push the chicken strips down.

Well, then I don't need the donkey to do his "plunger action," do I? Or are you saying it will help him shove down the chicken while not getting himself "stuck" in my band? I mean, could you imagine me having to go into KC's emergency room AGAIN with that problem? Shoot, the first time was embarassin' enough.

My question is what does the Bible say about all this????

Yea that projectile vomiting at the mall can be bad.

Well, yeah, especially when they thought I yacked up a rat!

I have plenty of education and I am an expert on MX Donkeys!

I'm new here and I have a question. Will I lose weight with my lap band? I might get one. I don't like pickles though. Please respond. I'm desperate. :scared2: If no one responds, I'll respond myself and wonder why no one cares and if I'll be alone the rest of my life. Is that cause I'm fat?? Should I eat vanilla or chocolate ice cream??