Ive had my lapband for 3 years now in August...I hate it...I want it out so bad, and cant afford the surgery. Im so miserable, I cant eat, I cant drink...I dont even have a fill in. I went by the guidelines my doctor gave me, I never lost a lot of weight. I throw up all the time, its so embarassing when your on a date or just hanging out with friends. I cant take it anymore, sometimes I just want to rip it out. Ive had complications since the first day I had it, but ignored it. When I brought them up to my doctor a couple of months later, he said I was fine and that I was basically lying about what I was eating. He all but told me I was a liar, and that I wasnt pretty because Im fat...I endured this for 2 years! I finally stood up for myself, he blacklisted me on my medical records, now doctors wont take me because of the notes on my records despite my begging and pleading. I hate how people are given power with something as simple as a Ph.D. I wish I would have researched it more, I wish I had thought it out more. I dont necessarily regret it, I just wish I would have used a different doctor with a more supportive attitude and staff. Im so embarassed, sometimes I tell people I dont have it anymore just so they dont ask why I didnt lose the weight. The smallest I got at one point was 165, and I didnt stay there long....thats when I was puking every single thing that I attempted to swallow, even sucking on hard candy. Im not saying I want to eat a burger, or something greasy and gross....I just want to enjoy eating chicken again and salads and fruits...I want to be able to eat something that is cold and not throw it up. (Ive only been able to hold down things that are warm). I want to live again. But Im completely without insurance, and the only way to get my band checked for problems is to go to the ER and pretty much demand a upper GI test. I dont have money, Im a single mother and full-time student. Im so embarassed, I feel like a failure...I hate this, I wouldnt recommend it to ANYONE! Im thinking about possibly getting it taken out and having a mini-gastric bypass in the next five years....it just makes me cry to think I have to live with this for 5 years...or more...I hate explaining to people that I dont know whats wrong, I hate being a failure, I hate being fat...Ive done everything in the book at least twice to lose the weight...and it just doesnt come off the way its suppose to...Im hoping that when I get insurance again, if I get it again, that I can have some blood tests run on my metabolism and thyroid. Its gotten to where Im dizzy a lot, I fell down last night...I eat maybe one meal a day, I dont snack and I usually throw most of what I eat up...including liquids. I have had problems with my body rejecting foreign objects (like piercings) before, and Im thinking that my body rejected my lapband or something...IDK I just want it gone! I cant go out to eat with friends, I have to sit and suffer....watching everyone else eat and get something to go or wait until I get home and eat some Cereal for fear of getting sick. Now Im just rambling...I have tears rolling down my face, I never cry...Im not a crier at all...but it hurts so bad, emotionally and physically...my stomach always feels like someone is stabbing it with a knife or punching it with a tight fist....sometimes it feels like it is litterally tied in a knot! I just hope and pray for insurance soon, for answers to my questions....I want to live, and enjoy life again...I dont understand why nothing ever works for me...Ive been on every "lifestyle change", diet suppliment, fad diet, in the world...most of these diets or lifestyle changes or whatever you want to call them require you to eat a lot more during the day than Ive ever been able to eat....Ive never been a chronic overeater, ofcourse Ive overeaten sometimes, but never a lot, I usually stuck to 2-3 meals a day and never any Snacks....I never was a fan of "real soda" so I usually drank diet (which now I drink coke zero when I do get something, but one can lasts me ALL day)...Damn America and high costs of healthcare! and poopoo on the insurance company for calling weight-loss surgery cosmetic although they consider me morbidly obese...I want to be normal for once..Im tired of being the fat friend...much less the failed fat friend....Sometimes I think its better to just be fat, than to be fat and have had weight loss surgery because then people just talk about how much you basically suck at life...and how you must stuff your face with pudding and such......Ive got news for them, I dont like pudding, I dont like ice cream, I sure as hell cant stand snack cakes......Im not a very unhealthy person.....but I cant lose the weight.....

Ill stop, Im repeating myself....Im just so frustrated right now.....Im tired of puking my guts up every single day!

I do have my medical records....

I know the law, and I know what the doctor has done that is illegal....however, I cant afford the lawyer even if its pro bono because theres a 50/50 chance that Im going to lose...and that means I have to pay EVERYONES court costs and I cant take that risk.

And when I have the time, I will sit down and talk on the phone, but theres something unappealing about talking to someone on the phone who has a screaming child in the background.

And when I say Im looking to file a complaint, that means Im in the process of doing it...im sorry for the misunderstanding, I am from the southeast texas, I speak a little differently in terms to what certain phrases mean.

Im sorry I have upset you, I will have Alexandra delete this post and my account this afternoon...all I wanted was support, to say, "this happened to me or my friend, and this is what they did..." or good luck! or something, I wasnt looking at what necessarily I could do, because I already knew that.....

But anyways, I will not burden your lives any further, I will just get back into my hollow shell.......

looks like I cant open up to my friends, family, or strangers.....oh well, back to holding it all in....

&& I honestly have no idea what hospital I was banded at, I know that sounds bad,but I never knew the name...I was never told...I had a pillow with a logo on it,but I cant remember what it said....I couldnt tell you what street the hospital is on or anything, I dont remember, that was four years ago and I let my parents handle everything....

Anyways, goodbye....thanks for the advice, but you have to understand the processes of things and your rung on the ladder...you cant just jump out and act like a fool to get what you want, you have to lie and wait until your opportunity and then get them....

oh well......goodbye........

I agree with Cleo's mom. see the drama she wrote? now it is OUR fault for not just patting her on the back and saying everything will be all right. Unless SHE stands up for HERSELF, no one else will either.

we are here Never Again when you choose to do that.

Not sure at all how one would not know what hospital they were in to have the surgery and be unable to find out. Very obviously she has other very serious issues going on and hopefully she will seek treatment for herself and certainly for her children's sake.

I agree with medical malpractice. Go to an attorney darlin' and let them run with it.

Have you applied for Social Security Disability?

You get Medicare with that after 24 months.

Remember, most disability claims get denied the first time or two.

Be persistent.

Sorry to hear of your pain. Life can be so darn hard sometimes. Remember, there's a fat old girl in the midwest thinking of you.

If you read her response you will see that she doesn't even know the name of the hospital where she got her band. And apparently she can't or won't contact her parents to find out. And she can't make phone calls anyway because apparently her child(ren) cry continuously during normal business hours. And she can't use a pro bono attorney on the chance that she might lose and have to pay court costs, etc.. So, you see she has an answer for every suggestion given here. It appears that she doesn't want help, just pity.

Yes, I agree to some point, but we all have to start somewhere. She is reaching out and we are here to listen. If anyone does not want to listen it's your option not to and not to say hurtful things.

I am curious as to how old you are Never.

Never you got some good advise here, now it's your option to use it.

From a little offline correspondence with Never and reading what she has written here, I suspect that what we have here is someone who is very frightened. Scared of the "medical monolith" that is nearly impossible to fight when something goes wrong. Scared for her own health. Scared about everything that is happening right now.

And I get that, I really do. I'm working on a project that might be of some help to her, and others in similar situations....kind of like I was a few years ago.

But, a person has to WANT to help themselves. They have to be willing to do the WORK to get what they want. And part of that is being able to listen to other people who are giving them a dose of reality.

On occasion, I'm accused of being a little harsh in my responses to some people on this forum. And, In fact, sometimes I am. But for me, this is NOT a social club. It's serious business.

There are places on Lap Band Talk where people go and talk about crap they bought on QVC, Eye shadow, and other mind-numbing stuff. And that is fine. Everyone needs a place to go, and they can talk about whatever they want.

But there are situations (many, in fact) where people like never_again come looking for help, or at least a sympathetic ear. It is sometimes hard to figure out exactly what it is they DO want, because when you give them what they CLAIM to want, they can get a little hostile.

So, helping people here can be a challenge at times. But, it's the only reason I come here. I had an ugly experience with my band, and I think that there are some specific things that people can do to avoid having a bad Band experience (or a bad WLS experience of ANY kind). My goal is to make sure that people HEAR about those things, whether they like or agree with them, or not.

(note: My response might seem a little unclear to some; it is meant for some people specifically, and it might not make sense to others. Sorry 'bout that...)

I hope that Never is reading these responses, because most of them are very accurate, and to the point. Particularly Cleo's Mom. She had been through some very, very tough stuff, and those seeking to gain some strength to weather their personal travails would do well to listen to what she has to say, and HOW she says it. She's a survivor, which is what MOST of us want to be.

Never needs to hear what's being said here, but at the same time I think she needs to know that we are all supportive of her, which I think we all are.

HH

Headhunter,

What a nice thing to do! :thumbup:

I could see that in never's posts also.

Sometimes we just need someone to listen.

I wish I had never started this thread....I dont know why I even logged back in...I already knew all my options, and yes Cleo all I wanted was a little bit of sympathy and perhaps some empathy.....Im a pretty smart cookie and know quite about about things like this due to my educational background.........however, the world doesnt necessarily work the way it is written down in books and documents, it works by people (who are ever-changing and all completely different).

I dont know the name of the hospital because I was in a wing of it called Texas Laparascopy (sic) Surgery Center or something like that in downtown Houston...I just realized that its been 4 years since Ive had my band not 3.......

I will just stick with talking to people in real life from now on that actually know me and have seen what I have gone through, rather than strangers whom Ive never met, or ever will.

I think headhunter has pretty much understood the most of what I have going on and the circumstances of things, we will email privately, however I do not expect to ever associate myself with this forum again.

Good day

I wish I had never started this thread....I dont know why I even logged back in...I already knew all my options, and yes Cleo all I wanted was a little bit of sympathy and perhaps some empathy.....Im a pretty smart cookie and know quite about about things like this due to my educational background.........however, the world doesnt necessarily work the way it is written down in books and documents, it works by people (who are ever-changing and all completely different).

I dont know the name of the hospital because I was in a wing of it called Texas Laparascopy (sic) Surgery Center or something like that in downtown Houston...I just realized that its been 4 years since Ive had my band not 3.......

I will just stick with talking to people in real life from now on that actually know me and have seen what I have gone through, rather than strangers whom Ive never met, or ever will.

I think headhunter has pretty much understood the most of what I have going on and the circumstances of things, we will email privately, however I do not expect to ever associate myself with this forum again.

Good day

You said you came on here to find out if anyone had gone through what you did and what they did to resolve it. Well, if you read the replies, mine especially, you will see that people gave you some very good concrete suggestions. This was done out of concern and a willingness to help. But you did not seem to want help, just pity. And that's okay. But don't come up with excuses as to why you can't/won't do what are reasonable things to improve your situation and then single me out. Anyone who knows me on these boards know that I am not one of the mean, in-your-face type posters. Quite the opposite. But you pushed the envelope.

If what you want is pity then title your thread: Just your pity, no suggestions. That's not what you asked for at first.

I think you are making the right move by staying off these boards and relying on your friends - I sure hope they can give you all of the sympathy and empathy that you crave.

You said you came on here to find out if anyone had gone through what you did and what they did to resolve it. Well, if you read the replies, mine especially, you will see that people gave you some very good concrete suggestions. This was done out of concern and a willingness to help. But you did not seem to want help, just pity. And that's okay. But don't come up with excuses as to why you can't/won't do what are reasonable things to improve your situation and then single me out. Anyone who knows me on these boards know that I am not one of the mean, in-your-face type posters. Quite the opposite. But you pushed the envelope.

If what you want is pity then title your thread: Just your pity, no suggestions. That's not what you asked for at first.

I think you are making the right move by staying off these boards and relying on your friends - I sure hope they can give you all of the sympathy and empathy that you crave.

Very well said.

I really don't want to extend this thread any further, but I think there is something we can all take away from this string of messages that is not negative.

I don't think one single person here was anything other than sympathetic and supportive. Everybody listened, some offered great tips and advice, some offered deep concern and maybe even prayers.

When you read a post like the original one, you respond in the best way you feel will offer comfort or help to the person posting. Even if the original poster did not like the way the thread continued, who knows, the advice given could very well have helped someone else who was reading along and had similar questions. So not all is lost here. You did the best you could, and it was nice of you to offer your time and concern.

Take care, everybody!

Oh SunnyRachel- you are so big hearted. Didn't we already talk about not getting into these messy threads, and not to take anything personal?

I miss you buy the way. Mail me.

I really don't want to extend this thread any further, but I think there is something we can all take away from this string of messages that is not negative.

I don't think one single person here was anything other than sympathetic and supportive. Everybody listened, some offered great tips and advice, some offered deep concern and maybe even prayers.

When you read a post like the original one, you respond in the best way you feel will offer comfort or help to the person posting. Even if the original poster did not like the way the thread continued, who knows, the advice given could very well have helped someone else who was reading along and had similar questions. So not all is lost here. You did the best you could, and it was nice of you to offer your time and concern.

Take care, everybody!

I agree. I think the information and advice was excellent and someone else who may be in a similar situation may find the information very worth while. So just because it went in a downward spiral for some strange reason doesnt mean it doesnt have value for anyone else who is truly in need of info.

tough love. Sometimes the truth just hurts and is hard to swallow. On BOTH sides. but it's love just the same. If we didn't care, we wouldn't have responded. the most loving thing you can do for anyone is to tell the truth. Lies and candy coated crap doesn't help anyone.

tough love. Sometimes the truth just hurts and is hard to swallow. On BOTH sides. but it's love just the same. If we didn't care, we wouldn't have responded. the most loving thing you can do for anyone is to tell the truth. Lies and candy coated crap doesn't help anyone.

Yes absolutely. And all the sympathy/empathy in the world wont help unless the person is willing to do whatever it takes.