I got my date as August 21.

CW 295

What all are you doing to prepare? I'm worried about starting pre-op diet too early and potentially running out of willpower in advance. I'm also looking for therapy for disordered eating to begin ASAP and continue through the process. I'm also working on not drinking during meals and thinking about how to start increasing my water uptake. I'm also contemplating how I can prepare meals with veg and protein for easy access.

Checking in to say hi and see how everyone is doing after the holiday. One more to go and it’s back to “normal” I hope. I haven’t gained too too bad considering the steroids. I am in PT now for my knee but it seems to be helping so hopefully another few weeks and I will be able to get back to some level of activity that will help. I miss yoga 🧘‍♀️ I seriously never thought I would hear myself say something like that. 😂 hope everyone had a wonderful holiday if you celebrate or if you don’t I hope You had a nice little vacation from the daily grind.

New Year’s resolutions..If you do them, what are they?? I haven’t decided what I want to resolve to do this year. For a lot of years mine was to “quit trying to quit everything.” 😂 but this year I think I can be a little more serious. After all. I haven’t gained too loads to be thankful for and feel as if I need to get my backside in gear and strive to do even better in terms of self care and my health. My body has survived a year of hell after many years of neglect and it’s time I take better care of it!! maybe that’s what my resolution will be. I will do my best to take care of my body and mind and work towards nourishing myself the way I deserve. Without obsessing about a scale or perfection. Just working towards even better self care and keeping my physical and mental health as a priority.

Edited December 29, 2025Dec 29 by ShoppGirl

1 hour ago, ShoppGirl said:

Checking in to say hi and see how everyone is doing after the holiday. One more to go and it’s back to “normal” I hope. I haven’t gained too too bad considering the steroids. I am in PT now for my knee but it seems to be helping so hopefully another few weeks and I will be able to get back to some level of activity that will help. I miss yoga 🧘‍♀️ I seriously never thought I would hear myself say something like that. 😂 hope everyone had a wonderful holiday if you celebrate or if you don’t I hope You had a nice little vacation from the daily grind.

Heeeey! I've been wanting to check in so glad u beat me to it haha! So glad you're progessing well with your treatments and im glad u managed to stabilise ur weight abit even with the holidays.. Happy holidays! We dont celebrate so it was a normal December.. i am doing well but I def slowed down abit. Not following a plan and then feeling guilty and my trainer basically confirmed I have an ED... which I dont deny but I am full aware of it. I cant stop thinking about food even after eating so its most probably Eating addiction.. and so far the surgeryis helping me not regain but I believe there would be a time where it will stop working when my body gets used to this new digestive system? Or am I safe forever lol

Oh well, its almost 1.5 years and I haven't changed my habits enough ... no regains but if I continue acting chilled about eating whatveer I wwnt, it will def creep back in.. so my new year resolutions is to try to have a good relationship with food 🙂 for the millionth time and well try for a baby teehee..

8 hours ago, Justarwaxx said:

Heeeey! I've been wanting to check in so glad u beat me to it haha! So glad you're progessing well with your treatments and im glad u managed to stabilise ur weight abit even with the holidays.. Happy holidays! We dont celebrate so it was a normal December.. i am doing well but I def slowed down abit. Not following a plan and then feeling guilty and my trainer basically confirmed I have an ED... which I dont deny but I am full aware of it. I cant stop thinking about food even after eating so its most probably Eating addiction.. and so far the surgeryis helping me not regain but I believe there would be a time where it will stop working when my body gets used to this new digestive system? Or am I safe forever lol

Oh well, its almost 1.5 years and I haven't changed my habits enough ... no regains but if I continue acting chilled about eating whatveer I wwnt, it will def creep back in.. so my new year resolutions is to try to have a good relationship with food 🙂 for the millionth time and well try for a baby teehee..

Have you talked to a therapist about she eating disorder? A lot of people on here swear by their experience with one and how it helped reframe their thinking about food. I honestly think that many of us that end up here have some degree of disordered eating if not a diagnosable version of it. There are also self help books but personally I think I would do better with the in person support. Perhaps with he work books in between.

29 minutes ago, ShoppGirl said:

Have you talked to a therapist about she eating disorder? A lot of people on here swear by their experience with one and how it helped reframe their thinking about food. I honestly think that many of us that end up here have some degree of disordered eating if not a diagnosable version of it. There are also self help books but personally I think I would do better with the in person support. Perhaps with he work books in between.

Im definitely considering it but it aint cheap and my government doesn't have one! But ill ask in my last surgical appointment in feb! Id love to speak to someone about it but deep down i feel I know exactly what they will say and what I need to do so I just need to do it!

Also its funny how its only me and @shoppgirl who write in this group!! Where is everyone! Update us beautiful ppl!

On 12/29/2025 at 9:00 AM, Justarwaxx said:

Also its funny how its only me and @shoppgirl who write in this group!! Where is everyone! Update us beautiful ppl!

Well we did informally commit to check in at least every August. I figured with email notifications some may see our activity and pop in to say hi. I just learned the hard way the first time that being on here was helpful to my being accountable and not being on here was bad for my progress. Little slips become bigger when left unchecked.

On 12/29/2025 at 8:59 AM, Justarwaxx said:

Im definitely considering it but it aint cheap and my government doesn't have one! But ill ask in my last surgical appointment in feb! Id love to speak to someone about it but deep down i feel I know exactly what they will say and what I need to do so I just need to do it!

Well there are always them workbooks on Amazon. They are probably like 20-30 dollars US. Maybe your team has one they would recommend. I mean we all know we need to eat better quality food less often and exercise more but with an eating disorder there is usually some mental work that needs to be done too. A therapist would be the easier way to get to the root of it but I bet a workbook written by a therapist could work too if you’re honest with yourself and really do the hard work.

6 minutes ago, ShoppGirl said:

Well there are always them workbooks on Amazon. They are probably like 20-30 dollars US. Maybe your team has one they would recommend. I mean we all know we need to eat better quality food less often and exercise more but with an eating disorder there is usually some mental work that needs to be done too. A therapist would be the easier way to get to the root of it but I bet a workbook written by a therapist could work too if you’re honest with yourself and really do the hard work.

If u know any recommendations l, id appreciate it 🙏

19 minutes ago, Justarwaxx said:

If u know any recommendations l, id appreciate it 🙏

I don’t have any to recommend but I’ve seen people on here that have mentioned them. Maybe do a post asking for suggestions. I’m sure someone will have one.

I’m really struggling lately and I need to be honest.

Most days, I eat mindfully. I plan, I measure, I prioritise protein, I listen to my body. But the food noise is so loud now. Louder than I feel I can handle.
It’s like my mind and body don’t care how mindful I am anymore.

There’s one day a week where I completely mess up. Not hunger… just cravings. Eating even when I know I don’t need it, while I’m eating I’m already telling myself to stop — but I don’t. And that one day feels like it’s slowing all my progress.

What scares me the most is regain. I’m terrified that this is how it starts.

After it happens, the shame and guilt hit hard. I feel weak, out of control, disappointed in myself. It puts me in such a low place mentally, and I start questioning everything:
Do I even have self-control? Why can’t I just say no?

I don’t eat because I’m hungry, I eat because the cravings won’t stop. My body feels like it’s screaming even when I’m physically full.

Of course you have self-control. I don’t know why we are convinced that obesity is a self-control issue probably because of the skinny people that have to lose 5 pounds and they do so by just laying off desert for a few days. Aren’t there other things in your life that you’d rather not due, but yet you do them. You go to do your exercise all the time, right, that’s self control. Obesity is an illness! It will probably be a lifelong struggle for all of us but it’s not something we need to bear ourselves up about. The guilt and shame may be stemming from something else entirely. The cravings too. If you say you are not hungry then it sounds like head hunger. If so, are you board, tired, lonely, sad, angry? Figuring out what you feel when the cravings happen may help you come up with a way to mitigate them. Did you see if you can find one of them workbooks for disordered thinking? People in here have talked about them. Maybe just search eating disorder or disordered eating. But most of all don’t give up. Even if you stumble, don’t do what I did with my sleeve which was to give up and throw it all away. Because once I gained it all back I realized that I was already happy with half of the loss but I was so hung up on a magic goal weight that I felt like a failure instead of celebrating my tremendous loss and my even more amazing gains (things I was able to do that I couldn’t before). Now, I’m at the same weight I was when I gave up before and sure, I would be happy to lose more but guess what? I’m still thrilled to be where I am and I am not beating myself up because I haven’t lost more. I will be thrilled to stay at this level of fitness. Maybe get that workbook, search online for a few more healthy recipes and even seek out a different fitness class just to change it up and see if you can get back into your groove. Is there anyone at your gym that can be an accountability buddy. That may help too. But I really think the shame and guilt stems from inside. Something mental that you just need to take the time to get to the bottom of. Maybe journaling when you start having these cravings.

1 hour ago, ShoppGirl said:

Of course you have self-control. I don’t know why we are convinced that obesity is a self-control issue probably because of the skinny people that have to lose 5 pounds and they do so by just laying off desert for a few days. Aren’t there other things in your life that you’d rather not due, but yet you do them. You go to do your exercise all the time, right, that’s self control. Obesity is an illness! It will probably be a lifelong struggle for all of us but it’s not something we need to bear ourselves up about. The guilt and shame may be stemming from something else entirely. The cravings too. If you say you are not hungry then it sounds like head hunger. If so, are you board, tired, lonely, sad, angry? Figuring out what you feel when the cravings happen may help you come up with a way to mitigate them. Did you see if you can find one of them workbooks for disordered thinking? People in here have talked about them. Maybe just search eating disorder or disordered eating. But most of all don’t give up. Even if you stumble, don’t do what I did with my sleeve which was to give up and throw it all away. Because once I gained it all back I realized that I was already happy with half of the loss but I was so hung up on a magic goal weight that I felt like a failure instead of celebrating my tremendous loss and my even more amazing gains (things I was able to do that I couldn’t before). Now, I’m at the same weight I was when I gave up before and sure, I would be happy to lose more but guess what? I’m still thrilled to be where I am and I am not beating myself up because I haven’t lost more. I will be thrilled to stay at this level of fitness. Maybe get that workbook, search online for a few more healthy recipes and even seek out a different fitness class just to change it up and see if you can get back into your groove. Is there anyone at your gym that can be an accountability buddy. That may help too. But I really think the shame and guilt stems from inside. Something mental that you just need to take the time to get to the bottom of. Maybe journaling when you start having these cravings.

Since that post, my coach got me the workbook qnd ive been doing it and also got me a journal to write how it feels at the time of the craving. Life changing! Its like the sound reduced abit. I've had the perfect 2 weeks with pure mindfulness ... the workbook really did open my eyes that I do have a eating disorder 😕 so now I need to appreciate myself more for being here now and the progess and be in q happy place

9 hours ago, Justarwaxx said:

Since that post, my coach got me the workbook qnd ive been doing it and also got me a journal to write how it feels at the time of the craving. Life changing! Its like the sound reduced abit. I've had the perfect 2 weeks with pure mindfulness ... the workbook really did open my eyes that I do have a eating disorder 😕 so now I need to appreciate myself more for being here now and the progess and be in q happy place

Well I’m glad you have had a couple of better weeks and that you are doing the workbook a journaling. I recently learned that writing with pen and paper 15 minutes a day actually helps in terms of cognition also so that’s an added bonus. Typing only uses half of our brain but handwriting uses it all. Keep working at it. You have already accomplished so much. BE PROUD!!

11 minutes ago, ShoppGirl said:

Well I’m glad you have had a couple of better weeks and that you are doing the workbook a journaling. I recently learned that writing with pen and paper 15 minutes a day actually helps in terms of cognition also so that’s an added bonus. Typing only uses half of our brain but handwriting uses it all. Keep working at it. You have already accomplished so much. BE PROUD!!

Agreed! Thank you!!