Hi guys! I‘m sorry if this is offensive or if this has been discussed many times before on here (I couldn‘t find any threads) but I feel like I’m going crazy and I need to talk about it. I‘m aprox. 7 months post op lost aprox. 120lbs and I‘m nearing the „goal weight“ I had 6 years ago. Logically I should be feeling amazing and I somewhat do. Like I‘m physically able to do a lot more again, which I‘m very appreciative of but somehow I feel fat. It‘s so odd. 120lbs ago I knew I was fat and I wasn‘t able to do certain things but I never felt fat. I felt fine. Now I have a „slightly overweight“ bmi and I feel super fat. Whats going on?!?

I didnt do this surgery because I was unhappy with how I looked or because I felt uncomfortable. I did this surgery because my health was starting to suffer and I needed to stop yoyo dieting, which I have done all my life. I always wanted to lose weight not because I thought I had to but because people always made me feel like I did. And I hated being treated as a fat person. So living in a fat body in the privacy of my own home or around friends and family I always felt good. Now I feel disgusting and huge and fat and gross and generally not good. This is solely based on my appearance (I feel amazing physically walking, running, erc.). Why does „fat“ all of a sudden feel bad and why do I feel fat when I‘m much much lighter than I was a year ago? Anyone else have experience with this? Does this go away? I really hope it does.

My theory atm is that I‘m in this weird in between stage and I have no idea how my body is being perceived by the general public. I realize this may be incredibly vain but I feel so bad I dont know whats going on.

Also I‘m starting to show a lot of lose skin around my stomach, which is giving me anxiety.

Maybe it‘s important my stats: 5‘8, SW/HW: 304lbs, CW: 185lbs, GW: 150 - 160lbs

You’re experiencing body dysmorphia. It’s weird because you can logically tell yourself your weight is okay & there is the evidence on the scale, the size of your clothes, etc. But then there is a emotional side which is very powerful that tells you that’s not you. You’re still fat, etc. That is the struggle.

It takes time to see how you are now. I’d walk past widows & mirrors & wonder who the slim person was. I’d even look about because the woman was wearing the same clothes as me. I remember staring at a pair of skinny jeans I’d bought because I couldn’t believe I could fit into something so small. You may think I’m crazy but I started to check the weight of actors who were a similar height to me so I would get a better understanding of my physical size. I found it helped.

A friend is having surgery soon to remove her excess skin (she has a lot) & has been causing a lot of body dysmorphia issues. She has been seeing a therapist to help how she sees herself but she feels while she can physically grab hold of her loose skin she won’t see the slim person underneath.

I didn’t do plastics. Many do. I don’t have a lot of loose skin. It doesn’t restrict me in my movements, cause me discomfort or limit how I dress. It’s a reminder if where I was & where I am now. It’s a personal decision whether you do have surgery or don’t.

Arabesque is POINT ON with the body dysmorphia. I went from a size 24 to a size 10. I'm currently obesssed with losing another 20lbs because there are days that I *feel* 300lbs. It's definitely a mind @*$& sometimes. Something stupid... I've been in 10's for a good year now - Yesterday I went to Banana Republic and bought a pair of pants - I didn't try them on and just KNEW I was a size 12. Got them home and my husband just laughed at them falling off me. We'll probably always have some sort of mind screw if you were overweight for a long time- whether you feel like you're a size 2 or a size 20, it's just part of the journey I think.

Yep, Body Dismorphia.

Take a pic of yourself now. Put it side-by-side with a pic of you in your heavier days.

You may find yourself in surprise. While we may lie to ourselves, pictures won’t.

P.S which is why i like to advocate taking pics of yourself before and regularly during. It helps to keep things in perspective.

Good Luck! ❤️

I know I suffer from Body dysmorphia. Good post. Relatable.

I was just thinking the other day when someone told me I was thin, that inside I still feel as fat as I did when I was at my heaviest (2008). Maybe because I feel, at any given moment, I could cave into the abyss of mindless binge eating again and end up where I started.

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19 hours ago, Tomo said:

I know I suffer from Body dysmorphia. Good post. Relatable.

I was just thinking the other day when someone told me I was thin, that inside I still feel as fat as I did when I was at my heaviest (2008). Maybe because I feel, at any given moment, I could cave into the abyss of mindless binge eating again and end up where I started.

Sent from my SM-S908U using BariatricPal mobile app

Interesting take on this. Self reflecting….my “fat” days I think are either grazing days or when I get hungry (or think I’m hungry)

36 minutes ago, MandoGetsSleeved said:

my “fat” days I think are either grazing days or when I get hungry (or think I’m hungry)

So i thought about this and i think for about a year and a bit after weight loss phase, i would feel “fat” every single time i ate something….because you could see the food in my stomach cuz it literally pops out from the food. You could feel it too…my tum is hard/firm when there was food in it. My fam jokes that they can tell when last i ate by looking at my stomach.

It aways went away after i digested.

Now that i think about it, this may be a contributing reason why i ate very little back then? I dunno, just thinking.

Anyway, im 3.5 yrs out now and it doesn’t bother me anymore, its been long enough now that I trust that bit of bloating eventually goes away.

I'm feeling it too, but as a result of not seeing the drastic and rapid changes I did in the first few months. I actually GAINED weight for the first time since being sleeved and while it was just 1 lb., it was disheartening. I got used to seeing the number drop by several pounds each week and the gain was sobering. I felt like it was the start of a downward spiral. Anyhow, I'm afraid of not being as pleased with how I look in the mirror, but it is what it is.

We've made huge strives and I'm trying to keep that in mind.