Hi! I’m new to the forum but looking for words of encouragement from other people who might be going through what I am. I had gastric bypass surgery in 2004. Lost over 100 pounds for about a minute. Started going to eating disorder therapy to try and see why I had such an unhealthy relationship with food. My weight finally settled at 200-210lbs but of course I was never satisfied. Finally after having a complication after a shoulder replacement in July 2019 and then Covid hit, I am the heaviest I have ever been after surgery, 267. I have to almost starve myself to lose weight now. I feel defeated and know that revision is the best option for me now. I don’t want to waste another year of my life! So I keep asking myself, why will this time be different?

Growing up and as a young adult, my father said that god put me in his life so he could have tolerance for fat people. My grandpa would ask me at a huge family dinner why I couldn’t be skinny like my friends and my grandma asked me why I I didn’t want to be model thin after giving me an entire bundt cake (I lived alone) to take home. As you can see I have not had the greatest support but also all of them have since passed away. I feel like this time I’m doing it for myself but am I just trying to convince myself?

Let me know why YOU think it will or was different for YOU?

Thanks for reading my very raw story.

1 hour ago, KSW22 said:

Hi! I’m new to the forum but looking for words of encouragement from other people who might be going through what I am. I had gastric bypass surgery in 2004. Lost over 100 pounds for about a minute. Started going to eating disorder therapy to try and see why I had such an unhealthy relationship with food. My weight finally settled at 200-210lbs but of course I was never satisfied. Finally after having a complication after a shoulder replacement in July 2019 and then Covid hit, I am the heaviest I have ever been after surgery, 267. I have to almost starve myself to lose weight now. I feel defeated and know that revision is the best option for me now. I don’t want to waste another year of my life! So I keep asking myself, why will this time be different?

Growing up and as a young adult, my father said that god put me in his life so he could have tolerance for fat people. My grandpa would ask me at a huge family dinner why I couldn’t be skinny like my friends and my grandma asked me why I I didn’t want to be model thin after giving me an entire bundt cake (I lived alone) to take home. As you can see I have not had the greatest support but also all of them have since passed away. I feel like this time I’m doing it for myself but am I just trying to convince myself?

Let me know why YOU think it will or was different for YOU?

Thanks for reading my very raw story.

I am so sorry this happened to you. My mother has this thing about fat people being disgusting and my daughter and I were just discussing today that we think she has an ED. I have body dysmorphia because if her calling me fat, black and ugly most of my childhood (she also has issues with colorism) so I know exactly the struggle. This is not a question you asked but I am going to suggest that in addition to food therapy you seek out mental health therapy to help with the horrible history you have had. It is also very important to have a support group, for me that has been my kids, a close friend of mine and online support groups like this one. Now to answer your question: I was banded for over 13 years during that time I learned the difference in feeling full and satisfied. I learned how to eat slowly and chew thoroughly, I learned that I don't have to eat all of the cake right now there will be other days for cake, I lost my love of bread and soda and if I do have a craving for it I learned to have it in moderation and quit. I have the tools it is just up to me to use them. So, if I have all of this knowledge why did I need a revision? Because after I lost my band I went hog wild and tried to eat all of the things that I THOUGHT I was missing, however, I was still unconsciously eating the way I described above but was making poor food choices too often. Without the band I gained about 42 pounds BUT I maintained that same weight for 5 years. In summary, I have the knowledge, the tool and I am mentally ready to keep the weight off for good. Thank you for joining my Ted Talk.

LisaMarrie, I appreciate your reply. Have you had your revision surgery yet? I am taking all your words in and have been thinking about this all morning. I have had mental health therapy along with my eating disorder and have worked on a lot of this in the past. I just sometimes doubt myself. If I already know what to do, why do I ignore myself? I am super grateful I have a loving husband and a best friend that both support my decision. My family is on board too but it’s my own shame of having to do this again that is difficult. I guess that’s another subject I can touch on but after 17 years of living with bypass surgery, I almost have to starve myself to lose any weight at all. Is that ring true for you too? It’s so hard to lose weight now that my stomach is stretched and having to eat 800 to 900 calories to lose weight makes for a very cranky lady.

I just want to feel like this time it’s forever. I feel ready and want these thoughts I’m having are normal and others might have felt the same way. Make sense?

Yes, makes perfect sense. When I do what I'm supposed to do I can take off weight fairly easily but not as easily with the band and I haven't been as motivated to keep it off. I had my band removed in 2018 and I am now 2 weeks post op VSG. I'm glad to hear that you have done the work and have a supportive circle. Now, it's up to us to commit, remain consistent and do what we know to do.

I look forward to seeing your journey. Good luck

Have you tried an abstinence diet, swearing off all sugar, wheat flour, and processed foods? in preparation for revision surgery, I have been following this since April 1 and have lost 36 lbs. I know I will have to do this for life. I started with all-liquid for 2 weeks and then the abstention diet. The first two weeks were hard, but I no longer have insatiable cravings.

I recommend reading A Pound the Cure by Matthew Weiner, Bright Lines Eating by Susan Peirce Thompson, and The Success Habits of Weightloss Patients by Colleen Clark.

I guess I will have to try something new now. I had my surgery Friday and they were unsuccessful doing the revision because of so much scar tissue from my perforated ulcer in 2012. He was able to repair my hiatal hernia but that’s all. Not sure how I’m feeling about it yet. I’m sure it will sink in sooner or later. Thanks for the reading references too.

So sorry to hear that, I know how disappointing that is to wake up and no revision. I hope that you are able to find something that works for you.

KSW22
I am sorry to hear you can not do your revision surgery and am wondering if you have ever looked into keto/low carb?

I had the roux en y in dec 2004 and lost 100 lbs, but than got almost back up to my original weight. Two years ago i found keto and Dr. Ken Berry (u tube him). I had success with losing about 70 lbs, but last year when covid hit I got off track and am now getting ready to start over.
It is the closest thing to what i should have done after my 1st surgery, if I had only known than what I know now.

look into it and if you have questions feel free to ask.

I think it's very introspective that you are asking yourself that question! I had a gastric bypass and I regained 55 pounds from the 100 I lost. I stopped my support group meetings, and stopped using many of the tools I learned before I had surgery. For me, stopping the carb intake is huge. Eating carbs I am constantly hungry. I went back to see the weight management people, I am seeing a dietician again, and I started Ozempic for appetite suppression as well as treatment for diabetes. Don't despair, you have sooo many options available to you. I think if you can get the carbs under control, you will see you still have the tool of the RNY available to you! You've just learned to eat around it.

Much luck to you!

I am wondering the same thing myself... excellent question.

I just wanted to say that I am in the EXACT SAME boat. I had a sleeve in 2016, lost just shy of 100lbs and my lowest recorded weight was 199. I then went through a breast cancer diagnosis and treatment including many surgeries, and this past summer I was back up to the exact weight as you - 267. I have been working closely with my doctor and am now down to 243. I am scheduled for a revision this December mainly for GERD, but hoping that it will help me with losing some extra weight, too. I just wanted to remind you that you are not alone!

Boy do I know how you feel...went in for surgery Oct. 25th , 2021 to have the "Sadi" done...I, too, woke up to find it could not be done because of too much scar tissue..the Dr. did remove some of the scar tissue, guess that's good. I knew there was a chance that this may not be able to be a success because of the scar tissue, most of which is from a couple of abdomen surgeries from yrs gone by. I do however still have the sleeve and it hasn't stretched..but just couldn't succeed with it, very little weight loss..

Long story short, they sent me home that night, just as sore nonetheless. This was my last chance at Bariatric anything, already had the Lapland, that was horrible, sick so much...but anyhow thought I would get my 2 cents in....and don't know what I will do now...I just did the 2 week liquid diet....with great anticipation..feeling disappointed in Maine...Donna

I had my surgery on Nov 1st I fell good however I am hungry is that even possible ?

I had my VSG 7/2015. I never felt much restriction and was hungry from the start. I restricted my calories to 800 per day and followed all the rules for the first 3 months and lost 60lbs… then my mother in law was dropped on my doorstep. LONG story but I was the sole provider for my husband and 2 small kids, working 12 hour night shifts. She had stage 4 emphysema and end stage esophageal cancer with alcoholic dementia to boot. Our house was tiny. She was 69 and weighed 65 lbs … let’s just say I was a bit stressed. I stopped counting calories. I plateaued for a full year and then started gaining. I’m now 6.5 years out and just 27 lbs from where I started. I’m hesitant to revise. My bariatrician tells me people tend to not have as much success with revision. I chose a sleeve because I didn’t want to risk not being able to absorb medications I need but my GERD is so bad I may not have a choice. I’d love to hear if anyone had a similar struggle with their initial surgery and were successful with the second.
Those in the thread who had the scar tissue and hernia repair, surely they will allow a follow up procedure.