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Let's talk about date night (or gals' night or...)



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I'm interested to hear from people who have changed up their date nights/get-togethers with pals/whatever away from food-based socializing: what do you do to hang out, now?

I'm a boring person, and so is my spouse--or, to be kinder to both of us, he's a homebody, and I've been in enough pain, the past few years, that I've leaned that way, too. We used to enjoy ordering pizza (or sometimes healthier things) and watching Netflix to wind down from the week on Friday nights. I really looked forward to it! Obviously, that tradition has got to change. It's a silly thing for me to latch on to, but I find myself really, really sad about letting it go.* So I really want to have something different that I can look forward to, instead of just mourning that tradition.

And just generally... I know that meeting friends in restaurants will be a thing I can do again, but I really want food to take a back seat in my life. Most of my friends are perfectly happy to meet up at a tea or coffee shop, anyway, so I'm not as stressed about that. Several of them enjoy board games or crafts, and I'm planning both kinds of get-togethers. I could probably drag some of them out to walk in local parks with me, too. But I'm open to more ideas!

What non-food things do you all do for date nights, or for nights with friends?

*This seems soon for the mood swings, but folks, I think the mood swings are upon me. Letting go of this one little tradition--that I definitely didn't participate in the week before surgery, either--is bringing tears to my eyes.

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We like to go for long evening walks around the different lakes in the parks here. And then we will come home and grill something together and catch up chatting...then we will usually watch something recorded or the Astros play. Sometimes we go to our neighborhood Italian hang-out where you get super cheap appetizers (1/2price) and split a caprese, then I will usually have shrimp pomodoro and spinach or broccoli, or grilled chicken and veggies. I'll have ice tea (sometimes a glass of wine) and he'll have wine and we'll visit with friends and watch the 'stros play.

Saturday is usually a walk around the parks with lakes again, errands and thrifting and afternoon drives. Sometimes we'll go grab a burger (bunless with side salad for each of us--no "electives" like french fries or onion rings). We might go see friends at our neighborhood wine bar and visit and listen to music, or go to a festival--we have lots in our little town. I will have iced tea usually--if I didn't have something Friday, I may have a glass of wine.

Then Sunday, another walk around the park, sometimes church, then it's back to the grind getting ready for the week, laundry, meal planning, some prep, making Sunday dinner that I use leftover meat for the week to eat...that sort of thing.

Edited by FluffyChix

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2 hours ago, CrankyMagpie said:

I'm interested to hear from people who have changed up their date nights/get-togethers with pals/whatever away from food-based socializing: what do you do to hang out, now?

I'm a boring person, and so is my spouse--or, to be kinder to both of us, he's a homebody, and I've been in enough pain, the past few years, that I've leaned that way, too. We used to enjoy ordering pizza (or sometimes healthier things) and watching Netflix to wind down from the week on Friday nights. I really looked forward to it! Obviously, that tradition has got to change. It's a silly thing for me to latch on to, but I find myself really, really sad about letting it go.* So I really want to have something different that I can look forward to, instead of just mourning that tradition.

And just generally... I know that meeting friends in restaurants will be a thing I can do again, but I really want food to take a back seat in my life. Most of my friends are perfectly happy to meet up at a tea or coffee shop, anyway, so I'm not as stressed about that. Several of them enjoy board games or crafts, and I'm planning both kinds of get-togethers. I could probably drag some of them out to walk in local parks with me, too. But I'm open to more ideas!

What non-food things do you all do for date nights, or for nights with friends?

*This seems soon for the mood swings, but folks, I think the mood swings are upon me. Letting go of this one little tradition--that I definitely didn't participate in the week before surgery, either--is bringing tears to my eyes.

Netflix and cocoa? Netflix and coffee? Netflix and cottage cheese? Netflix and cod...

Lol eventually you'll still want live the life you love *watch Altered Carbon* and you will just with different foods around sometimes.

There are Trivia nights at places that seem like A LOT of fun...

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42 minutes ago, GreenTealael said:

Netflix and cocoa? Netflix and coffee? Netflix and cottage cheese?

Netflix and cod...

Lol eventually you'll still want live the life you love *watch Altered Carbon* and you will just with different foods around sometimes.

There are Trivia nights at places that seem like A LOT of fun...

^^^^^THIS!!!

bahahahahahaaha!!

We sometimes go to trivia night on Tuesdays!! So fun! They also have it at the library! Go figure!

Edited by FluffyChix

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  1. OK, first let me get the fact that I am not a woman out of the way......that being said there is absolutely no reason that I can see that you need to completely change up date night if that is what the two of you enjoy! Yes you may need to change out the pizza but there is no reason why you can not have something healthier! Not only that but why can't you have a healthier version of pizza? There are several low carb recipes that you will be able to find on youtube. My wife LOVES to eat out, that accompanied with my busy schedule and eating well over 8K calories per day at my job as well as some "life" stress made me gain weight like nobody's business. We still go out but not HALF as much and when we do, we now split a meal and opt for a healthier option. We still have date night and go out but have changed it, I don't order dessert anymore, nor do I drink sweet tea or soda,. I am a strong believer that in this journey that we are all on part of success is a matter of finding out why you did what you did, and modifying said behavior and exercising in order to keep the weight off. Please don't take this the wrong way........but it wasn't one or two date nights a week that put the weight on (I know it wasn't for my big behind!!😂). And I doubt that one or two date nights will be enough to make you put the weight back on. Please go enjoy the time with your husband, no matter what it is! Take a walk, go play bingo, lazer tag, or start working out together! I don't care just as long as the two of you are doing it together and enjoying each others company!! (Oh and its healthy......😋) From a guys POV sometimes its not about what we do with the woman its about just spending time together and being able to communicate.

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I agree, you can still do Netflix and chill, but have it fit in your new healthier lifestyle.

Order in Thai (lots of yummy Protein based options), middle eastern kabobs, sashimi, poke, etc.

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OK, maybe I phrased my question wrong. I know that Netflix still comes to my house, and I know that I can (eventually, at some point in the future, when I can eat food again) order healthier foods or make my own pizza-like thing and have a very similar experience. And I also know that the pizza wasn't the point; it was the tradition, the having-something-to-look-forward-to, the let's-treat-ourselves-to-something-we-like, and besides the pizza itself, nothing about that has to change, strictly speaking. It's really nice of you all to point that out, but that wasn't supposed to be the point of my question, sorry. Instead, I wonder:

What if we took this opportunity and made a new, better tradition? What might that look like? I feel like lots of people have probably (re)discovered things they like to do with their significant other, or their friends, or whoever, that they didn't do before, and I'd love to steal those ideas. :) A night of Netflix now and then is cool, and we will definitely do that. But those sedentary habits are part of what I'm trying to break up, here, you know?

@Bhageerah says "Please go enjoy the time with your husband, no matter what it is! Take a walk, go play bingo, lazer tag, or start working out together! I don't care just as long as the two of you are doing it together and enjoying each others company!!" - It's true, just choosing to do anything at all and make it a special occasion is pretty great! And those were some good ideas. Give me more ideas, friends! (Please and thanks!)

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My husband & I used to go out A LOT. We travel, try new restaurants, and attend a lot of events. We used to prioritize food and drink while doing those things.

We still go out a lot but now we are going to a lot of shows. Theatre, classical concerts, ballet & the movies. We still go out to restaurants but we are making it a point to try new ones and not go to our favs. There’s emotion attached to the old ones and emotion attached to eating isn’t healthy for me. I get a Soup and have a couple bites of of my husbands entree. We are typically sticking to high end restaurants. They usually have a few broth based options for me, small portions, & high quality food.

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