Has anyone had this surgery and NOT told friends or family? I got sleeved 3/8 and have told 2 best friends. They both have gotten the surgery done 3 years ago. Every time I would bring up the topic of Bariatric surgery I would get the negative comments of “thats the easy way out” and “just exercise”. I don’t wanna hear anyone’s mouth. I’m not embarrassed about the surgery at all. I just don’t have many supportive people in my family.

I'm a very private person so when I had the surgery few months ago I told only my younger sister out of 5 siblings. Last time I checked I don't see anyone with plastic surgeries (implants, nose job, Lipo, etc) announcing it to the world so why should I announce mine? It's nobody's business and I keep it that way.

I can definitely relate as I am a very private person as well. It’s your body and it’s your business.

3 hours ago, KateBruin said:

I was just talking to my psychiatrist today about how I’m treated so differently now that I’m down 90 lbs. Before I was 276ish at 5’6” and definitely appeared overweight but I was actually never visually huge. Now people are so much more friendly and chit chat more. Even people at my gym. We think it’s a combo looking much thinner and my increased confidence because he said I basically glow. It’s sad people treat the overweight/obese so differently. Now I make a cognizant effort not to in case I did before and never noticed.

It’s been a regular conversation topic at my talk therapy as well. For me I haven't noticed the people I know treating me any differently since losing weight (with one exception, and she can go to hell), and with people I meet for the first time after losing weight, I don’t know how they would have treated me prior to weight loss.

My family knows and they are super and totally supportive. Many of them struggle with weight and well and my mom got the DS surgery two years ago and was actually the one who suggested it- in an effort to help me not live the same life she had to.

I have not told my friends- we are adults now and even though they are amazing we don’t talk daily and we are all so wrapped up in our families and work that when we see each other everything is about the kids and the daily grind. It hasn’t come up and since I’ve fluctuated weight my entire life- a big weight loss isn’t a shocking thing for them to see.

I’m a secret sleever! Haha. My husband, father, and aunt are the only people who know. I haven’t even told my sister. Haha. I just don’t think it’s anyone’s business. I’m only a little over a month out from surgery and I’ve had several meals out with friends and they never suspected anything. It also helped that my surgery fell with Lent...I told everyone I gave up carbs and booze for Lent (which is pretty true but also happens to be physically mandatory...haha!) good luck!

I only told my husband, and a few close friends. I have always been the heaviest in the family and I knew this would bring up all kinds of feelings. Plus naturally I do not like tons of attention so I did not want people looking commenting that I've lost too much, not enough, too fast, too slow etc. and finally I did not want to hear how easy this is...

It's not a big deal because I have been on one diet after another since I was in my early teens. Like most folks on this thread some of the diets have been absolutely crazy! Everyone is used to it... The difference is I will be successful!

I am so glad that others are thinking about this. My family is mostly supportive? I've mentioned it a few times, however I am the only overweight one, so they all think (even if they only say it occasionally) that I should be able to do it myself. However I've been trying for 7 years! So I keep going back and forth on whether or not I want to tell that I've started the process and will be having it done no matter what.

But my awesome husband knows, and is super supportive <3 He's kind of amazing like that!

I’m pre-op, but getting close. I have only told my immediate family (6 kids and spouse) No extreme negative comments, just concerns from a few. My husband is having second thoughts. But he has Alzheimer’s and I’m doing this as much for him as me. I need to get healthy to take care of him better. I know this is going to be very hard and the biggest change I have ever made in my life. I don’t want ANY negative people putting in their two cents!

Has anyone had this surgery and NOT told friends or family? I got sleeved 3/8 and have told 2 best friends. They both have gotten the surgery done 3 years ago. Every time I would bring up the topic of Bariatric surgery I would get the negative comments of “thats the easy way out” and “just exercise”. I don’t wanna hear anyone’s mouth. I’m not embarrassed about the surgery at all. I just don’t have many supportive people in my family.

I only told my hubby & 5 others, People are so judgemental therefore to prevent me from loosing my cool I told only a select few. When I'm at family functions or eating with friends I just say I'm managing my portion control (which is true)

HW: 247 VSG:6/1/17 CW:177(03/17/18) GW:185?

Just curious---Are there Secret Bypassers out there as well?

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im so glad i saw this thread. I've told three ppl. a coworker who asked as she is researching her options, my friend who came with me on surgery day and my God sister whom I was hesitant to tell and now we dont speak at all anymore because she has been very negative about everything since my surgery. my only regret is telling her in confidence because she told my son and now im convinced shes told other family as well.

I did tell family, despite the fact that my parents and brother had unbelievably bitchy things to say about a family friend who had WLS about a decade ago. They’ve been largely supportive.
For the most part, I don’t tell others unless they ask how I lost weight, or I have to tell them (i.e. explaining why I can’t drink carbonated beverages).

You can always tell them that any carbonated beverage can contribute to bone loss. So encourage them to stop there sodas too. Just a thought

I only told my husband, and a few close friends. I have always been the heaviest in the family and I knew this would bring up all kinds of feelings. Plus naturally I do not like tons of attention so I did not want people looking commenting that I've lost too much, not enough, too fast, too slow etc. and finally I did not want to hear how easy this is...
It's not a big deal because I have been on one diet after another since I was in my early teens. Like most folks on this thread some of the diets have been absolutely crazy! Everyone is used to it... The difference is I will be successful!

Same here As you, my husband and 2 friends know that I will be having the procedure done. My family is way to critical.

Has anyone had this surgery and NOT told friends or family? I got sleeved 3/8 and have told 2 best friends. They both have gotten the surgery done 3 years ago. Every time I would bring up the topic of Bariatric surgery I would get the negative comments of “thats the easy way out” and “just exercise”. I don’t wanna hear anyone’s mouth. I’m not embarrassed about the surgery at all. I just don’t have many supportive people in my family.

I know the feelings very well. I’m a secret soon to be sleeved . This September

Prior to surgery I only told a few people I was comfortable with, who were all supportive. Now that’s it’s done people are noticing, especially being away from work a few weeks. I tell them if they ask what I did. The way I see it is haters gonna hate and that’s their trip not mine.


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I'm definitly keeping it close to the chest. Though I don't want to, I might tell my dad in the off chance something happens