Let me start by saying that I am 100% in favor of people having the right to keep their surgery private and to choose who to tell, or not to tell. Having said that, I have decided to tell family and co-workers that I am having the surgery. Because WLS is getting to be so common now, when others see someone having rapid weight loss, they usually speculate that surgery was involved - at least that's been my experience. I'd rather just be open about it than have people talk behind my back...but that's just me.

For those who are keeping it a secret, or trying to, I was wondering if any of you have been busted lying about not having surgery? I've read a lot of the little tricks that people do to hide their uneaten food at restaurants or excuses for why they are loosing weight. Any of that ever backfire on anyone? Just curious.

Edited November 19, 20178 yr by VSGnewguy

I think that more believe that they are keeping it a secret than actually are. The instances of successful massive weight loss by diet and exercise alone are so rare that most intuitively know that something else is involved. If it isn't WLS, then it's something more serious like cancer or other major life threatening disease.

Well... my daughter sadly let it slip to my husbands family (that I do not get along with at all). She was kinda set up. My daughter is 10 and my husband went to his sisters house to fix something for her. His sister randomly asks if Im still on my diet... trying to get my husband to gossip about me I guess. My daughter innocently pipes up .. Isn' t mommy getting surgery on her stomach? . Daughter knows Im keeping it a secret but she figured her Aunt was family so its ok to talk about it. In truth my husbands family are the literal last people that I wanted to know my business. I never ever see them but they are the biggest gossips and we live in a small town. I havent had my surgery yet (2 weeks!!) If I was going to tell I wish it would have been on my own terms. I told my children 13 and 10 because I wanted them to know what was going on when I cant eat certain things etc. I guess I should have been more specific about who was on the know list and who wasnt with them.

I almost did. I told everyone I had gall bladder removed. A few weeks later, had a friend ask who my gal bladder surgeon was because they actually have to have it removed and wanted a recommendation! I just reminded them I had it done in New York City, which i know they were dead set against going to..it is over 2 hours away. So they replied, "forget that!"

The closer I get to having my surgery (the 21st) the more I want to tell people. I am proud that I am finally taking control of my health and getting my weight under control. We are going to visit family for a week around Christmas and trying to hide it when visiting 2 different families everyday just seems exhausting. I don’t want one of my kids or one of the few people I’ve told to slip so I think I will just let people know after I have it done. One of the people I told is already telling everyone at church and one person has been very disrespectful in addressing me about it.


Have a great day!
Amanda [emoji16]
HW 248 CW 241 SW ?
Surgery Date: 11/21/2017.
Goal weight 150’ish ??

I told my husband and my two teen daughters and two very good friends. That was it. Didn't tell my mother, my sister or anyone else. When people ask how I lost the weight, I stick with the truth -

I have been working with a medical team

I write down everything I eat

I eat between 60-100 grams of protein at day

I drink at least 64 ounces of water a day

I work out for 9-10 hours a week, including 5 hours fencing, an hour of Pilates and strength training.

It's been really hard work

I pretty much don't eat bread, white flour, sugar or carbonated things any more.

All of that is true.

I told my office I needed to have a procedure and left it at that and implied, without saying anything, that it was "female" surgery which stopped anyone from asking more. (Besides, legally, they can only ask how long you will be out per your doctor and whether you will have restrictions when you return.). My girls were 17 and 13 when I had my surgery. I told them this was something that was not discussed outside our family - ever. They haven't said a word, as far as I know.

I think that more believe that they are keeping it a secret than actually are. The instances of successful massive weight loss viz diet and exercise alone are so rare that most intuitively know that something else is involved. If it isn't WLS, then it's something more serious like cancer or other major life threatening disease.

Amen to that!

5 hours ago, Frankette said:

In truth my husbands family are the literal last people that I wanted to know my business. I never ever see them but they are the biggest gossips and we live in a small town.

That would be a massive pain-in-the-arse ... i.e. dealing with the fall-out from that.

Essentially not your daughter's fault but makes it hard to maintain privacy.

I have three siblings. I'm 61, 'old' sister is 57, brother 56 and 'young' sister 52.

My younger sister and I have a great rapport ... and we both swear our middle siblings were switched by aliens before their teens.

The middle two are church-addicted and intolerant souls. They phone up to lecture on lifestyle issues, internal family matters and parenting/grand-parenting issues.

I will pretend to be asleep if they come to my house for no acceptable reason ... it is just too tedious to deal with their ongoing issues and BS.

The 'old' sister blames me and her sister that her kids (32, 30 & 29) don't talk (by choice) to her and her husband any more.

I go through that with my husband's family and a few of my family members as well. I can't help but laugh as I think I was the one switched at birth as my siblings are in everyone's business. I told my husband not to tell anyone on his side. Sad we have to go through this, but maybe we all have family members like this. The only good side for me, we live deep in the country, far from everyone else and I don't have to deal with them face to face, it's easy to ignore a phone call.

Wishing you the best.

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I have told my kids/spouses and a couple friends and a niece, and two friends hundreds of miles away. I am retired - so no work to deal with.

Regret telling niece, as she may have told my bio sister. But my bio sister is currently not speaking to me - aren't relatives fun!!! <sarcasm >

I figure eventually it will become common knowledge with family but by then I will be near goal and won't care anyway. Acquaintances and my square dancing friends don't travel in my family's circle of friends so there won't be gossip from that realm. I have lost 70#s before so people have seen me much thinner doing it on my own and will not think otherwise.

Now - when I go buy new boobs, and get a LBL, I am sure there will be plenty of gossip! That might be rather fun though.

I'm not telling friends and family just yet. I know my family would argue with me about it: that it's a waste of money, too dangerous, etc., and that I should just do it "naturally." My surgery is scheduled for January 11th; I won't see family until sometime in May or June, so... I'll tell them then. And then they can yell at me all they want. (Family: Mom and Dad)

I'll tell my boss and my immediate team members at work - mostly because I'm going back to work just a week after being sleeved and don't want them to think I'm just slacking off. At the moment, most folks, both friends, co-workers and family, know that I'm going to Thailand - I've had a vacation to Thailand booked for three years and finally scheduled it. But I'm too fat to go there right now; I've been dreading the trip and finally canceled it. Instead, I'm taking the time off work to go have the surgery. I don't want to lie to my boss and team members about where I'm going.

Once my weight loss starts showing and if folks ask, I'll either tell them that I'm on a permanent "Whole30"-style diet (paleo/keto) or flippantly say something like: "Oh, yeah, I had half my stomach removed," depending upon who is asking. But I'm not openly telling anyone and everyone.

Of course, I do have an acquaintance/casual friend who used to be quite heavy and very large. She started dropping weight rapidly and would tell us that she was just sticking to a very strict diet. It was only after about six months of this that, finally, my sister-in-law said to me: "Doesn't she realize that we all know she had some kind of bariatric surgery? I mean, we're not stupid!" hah! Um... till she said that, I totally believed our friend's story that she was dieting/exercising it off. Guess I'm the dummy. lol.

41 minutes ago, tBot said:

Of course, I do have an acquaintance/casual friend who used to be quite heavy and very large. She started dropping weight rapidly and would tell us that she was just sticking to a very strict diet. It was only after about six months of this that, finally, my sister-in-law said to me: "Doesn't she realize that we all know she had some kind of bariatric surgery? I mean, we're not stupid!" hah! Um... till she said that, I totally believed our friend's story that she was dieting/exercising it off. Guess I'm the dummy. lol.

I had a similar experience with a co-worker. He was off work for a little over a month and came back nearly 50 lbs lighter. He told everyone it was diet and exercise but later confided to me that he had gotten WLS. Of course, that's what everyone else had already been saying.

Just have to love family. Glad I'm not the only one with family drama!

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Let me start by saying that I am 100% in favor of people having the right to keep their surgery private and to choose who to tell, or not to tell. Having said that, I have decided to tell family and co-workers that I am having the surgery. Because WLS is getting to be so common now, when others see someone having rapid weight loss, they usually speculate that surgery was involved - at least that's been my experience. I'd rather just be open about it than have people talk behind my back...but that's just me.
For those who are keeping it a secret, or trying to, I was wondering if any of you have been busted lying about not having surgery? I've read a lot of the little tricks that people do to hide their uneaten food at restaurants or excuses for why they are loosing weight. Any of that ever backfire on anyone? Just curious.

Busted lying? Not sharing isn't lying. What is there to bust. No ones asked me anything I haven't said anything lol. So.. nope.

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Let me start by saying that I am 100% in favor of people having the right to keep their surgery private and to choose who to tell, or not to tell. Having said that, I have decided to tell family and co-workers that I am having the surgery. Because WLS is getting to be so common now, when others see someone having rapid weight loss, they usually speculate that surgery was involved - at least that's been my experience. I'd rather just be open about it than have people talk behind my back...but that's just me.
For those who are keeping it a secret, or trying to, I was wondering if any of you have been busted lying about not having surgery? I've read a lot of the little tricks that people do to hide their uneaten food at restaurants or excuses for why they are loosing weight. Any of that ever backfire on anyone? Just curious.

Plus since people have known me I've had drastic losses. And drastic gains lol so nothing new here. I lost 50 in 3 months last year. And that's pre op. And did the same this year post op. So nothing concerning or out of the ordinary.[emoji23]

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Let me start by saying that I am 100% in favor of people having the right to keep their surgery private and to choose who to tell, or not to tell. Having said that, I have decided to tell family and co-workers that I am having the surgery. Because WLS is getting to be so common now, when others see someone having rapid weight loss, they usually speculate that surgery was involved - at least that's been my experience. I'd rather just be open about it than have people talk behind my back...but that's just me.
For those who are keeping it a secret, or trying to, I was wondering if any of you have been busted lying about not having surgery? I've read a lot of the little tricks that people do to hide their uneaten food at restaurants or excuses for why they are loosing weight. Any of that ever backfire on anyone? Just curious.

That must be hard needing to hide food etc etc. That's way to much for me. I don't do anything to hide it. I eat what I want leave what I want. If someone asks me why I didn't eat it. I simply say "because I didn't want it ". That must be hard needing to do all those things.

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