OK, so here is a NSV I had a few days ago. I am going to admit it is kind of immature and vain. None the less, it felt really good (evil grin). Warning: long post!

My husband's sister - I will call her Shelby here- lives 4 states away and has pretty much hated me since we met. She was super close to my husband's ex-wife, the two of them are two peas in a pod. So for that reason, no matter how nice and cordial I have been to Shelby, she is outright cold and often blatantly rude to me. It goes so far as her telling my step kids off-color remarks and things she thinks about me, including one lovely piece of advice: "Just don't eat whatever Kelly eats. You don't want to end up like her, do you?"

When I met her 5 years ago, I was understandably nervous and self conscious: I had 235 lbs on my 5'3" frame. In contrast, Shelby is taller and weighed maybe 140 lbs. She is also totally into appearances and looks. After we met, she called my husband and asked how he could have "down-graded" from his ex to me. I was so hurt. (But my husband promptly stood up for me and then hung up).

I saw her three times over the past 5 years. Each time I felt so awkward and self conscious, knowing how judged I was in her eyes. It never should have mattered to me, but it did.

Last Monday, Shelby came into town for my step-daughter's dance performance and to visit my husband's ex. I am three months post op. We did not tell Shelby or anyone on his side of the family about my surgery. I have gone from a size 20/22 to a comfortable 12 and have lost 60 lbs, down to 179 and my confidence has really began to flourish. At the dance, we spotted Shelby and her two kids. She was disheveled and looked uncomfortable. Her usually perfectly made up face was smeared and she looked like she was having a hot flash. Also, she is remarkably heavier than lat time I saw her. Now I will say I do not ever judge anyone on their weight and I never will. I have had all too much judgment and so I truly have all the empathy on those like me dealing with body image issues. But I bring it up because of the irony and scathing hell I had been on the receiving end of from her.

We approached her to say hello and offer her a seat next to us. She refused, and, didn't even acknowledge me. Her face was flush and she was angry and visibly stressed. After the show my husband asked if she and the kids wanted to join us for dinner. She declined and said she was going out with my husband's ex. Again, not looking me in the eye, zero acknowledgement. I have to insert here that I was dressed nice, donned some heals, had a fresh haircut and did my makeup. (pretty fancy for a simple gal like me). I was wearing a flattering trench style long jacket that really made my waist look small.

Right before we left the dance hall I was leaving the ladles room and my husband said he saw Shelby eyeing me from behind, surveying my new shape with her eyes. I went to dinner that night feeling a huge victory. A vain one- yes. But ooooh sometimes these things just feel so good.

To come down to earth, I do have a muffin top from hell that if Shelby saw she would laugh in pure delight. I hide it well- but would LOVE to figure out how to lose! With rapid weight loss I am getting that skin, so I am trying to find ways to reduce it.

Edited January 6, 20179 yr by The New Kel

@@proudgrammy

Muffin top= that roll of skin that hangs over your jeans. lol! It afflicts more than just WLS people.

in fact if you look at the website "people of Walmart" you'll see some gals proudly sporting theirs!

OK, so here is a NSV I had a few days ago. I am going to admit it is kind of immature and vain. None the less, it felt really good (evil grin). Warning: long post!

My husband's sister - I will call her Shelby here- lives 4 states away and has pretty much hated me since we met. She was super close to my husband's ex-wife, the two of them are two peas in a pod. So for that reason, no matter how nice and cordial I have been to Shelby, she is outright cold and often blatantly rude to me. It goes so far as her telling my step kids off-color remarks and things she thinks about me, including one lovely piece of advice: "Just don't eat whatever Kelly eats. You don't want to end up like her, do you?"

When I met her 5 years ago, I was understandably nervous and self conscious: I had 235 lbs on my 5'3" frame. In contrast, Shelby is taller and weighed maybe 140 lbs. She is also totally into appearances and looks. After we met, she called my husband and asked how he could have "down-graded" from his ex to me. I was so hurt. (But my husband promptly stood up for me and then hung up).

I saw her three times over the past 5 years. Each time I felt so awkward and self conscious, knowing how judged I was in her eyes. It never should have mattered to me, but it did.

Last Monday, Shelby came into town for my step-daughter's dance performance and to visit my husband's ex. I am three months post op. We did not tell Shelby or anyone on his side of the family about my surgery. I have gone from a size 20/22 to a comfortable 12 and have lost 60 lbs, down to 179 and my confidence has really began to flourish. At the dance, we spotted Shelby and her two kids. She was disheveled and looked uncomfortable. Her usually perfectly made up face was smeared and she looked like she was having a hot flash. Also, she is remarkably heavier than lat time I saw her. Now I will say I do not ever judge anyone on their weight and I never will. I have had all too much judgment and so I truly have all the empathy on those like me dealing with body image issues. But I bring it up because of the irony and scathing hell I had been on the receiving end of from her.

We approached her to say hello and offer her a seat next to us. She refused, and, didn't even acknowledge me. Her face was flush and she was angry and visibly stressed. After the show my husband asked if she and the kids wanted to join us for dinner. She declined and said she was going out with my husband's ex. Again, not looking me in the eye, zero acknowledgement. I have to insert here that I was dressed nice, donned some heals, had a fresh haircut and did my makeup. (pretty fancy for a simple gal like me). I was wearing a flattering trench style long jacket that really made my waist look small.

Right before we left the dance hall I was leaving the ladles room and my husband said he saw Shelby eyeing me from behind, surveying my new shape with her eyes. I went to dinner that night feeling a huge victory. A vain one- yes. But ooooh sometimes these things just feel so good.

To come down to earth, I do have a muffin top from hell that if Shelby saw she would laugh in pure delight. I hide it well- but would LOVE to figure out how to lose! With rapid weight loss I am getting that skin, so I am trying to find ways to reduce it.

Great post I loved reading it and wasn't that long. First this Shelby person is an idiot, some people love to make others feel terrible just because they live a miserable life. Remember misery loves company, those are the kinda people I would love to knock out. I was bullied a lot in junior hs, and I just can't believe people can be so cruel and she's a rude bitch her and her little friend deserve each other. I really hate bullies they are just mean people.

Don't let them ruin your new found body and wear some fancy, sassy clothes so you can show off what you are working for and she is the fat one now.LOL

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muffin top= roll of skin that hangs over your jeans.

@@The New Kel

thanx for the explaination!!!

now i hopefully will be able to sleep tonight!!

continued good luck

kathy

kathy

Muffin top = love handles. Embrace it. . Congratulations on taking the high road and gaining the high ground.

KARMA! exfoliating helps the skin too. Spanx will be your best friend.

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There are few times when "immature and vain" are appropriate or reasonable and this is one of them. As someone who squirms from heavy detail, I usual skip posts this lengthy (and for its length, I've read none of the replies) and I'm glad I stopped in. Little Shelby is quite the bittch. It is my imperious declaration that, while it is horrid to judge people for their weight, she must be so judged for the weight she's gained. Kick her in the kishkas! She really is loathsome. It's one thing for her to resent you, apparently poorly founded as it is, but to interfere in your relationship with your husband's kids is unforgivable. For her to have made the ugly remark to her brother after you and she met is the same. (I have an argument with your husband as well.)

Alas, you can't reduce the muffin top, but you can improve its appearance by tightening the muscles -- crunches and plenty of other exercises are to be found.

Let's hear it for the victor!

Edited January 8, 20179 yr by WLSResources/ClothingExch

Good for you! You are doing this for yourself, but you have a right to feel so good about the way you look and are feeling. I think being overweight makes some of us more sympathetic towards others and nobody deserves to be treated the way she acts. Keep on shining!

There is no revenge like living well.

Amen, sister.

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Oh my gosh, I LOVE this! This is exactly how I feel about my sister-in-law. She is a HORRIBLE person! She lost a ton of weight and told everyone that she just "put the fork down". I'm convinced she had the band. After I had my surgery and lost WAY more weight than her, she just stares from across the room.

No shame in your post, I love it!!!!

Linda