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Unsuportive relative

I got banded in Feb 05 it took me a while but I didn't start to lose weight until oct 06 and it has been coming off steadily 5 to 6lbs a month. I am pretty happy about that because I wanted to get it taken off after the first year when it didn't seem like I was going to lose anything. Well after all this my mother is not the mothering kind and I have come to terms with that but I can tell she is jealous because she doesn't accept the fact that I have lost weight (75+lbs so far) so she always wants to give me clothes and that are 3x or 4x size clothes. When I tell her that certain clothes I wear I can wear a 2x or a 1x now depending on how they are made. She still gets me clothes in a 3x or 4x and I can only wear it as a sleep shirt because they are so big. I told her to stop giving me clothes because I don't need them ( she works for nike and gets giveaways twice a year). I mean who doesn't like free stuff but she makes me feel that I am still huge true I have a lot more weight to lose but I feel good that I can wear smaller clothes. Eventhough she doesn't say encouraging words to me she asks me do I think she could get a lap band done because she can't seem to get the weight off.:angry

I mean I want to show off how much I have lost and how good I feel about my self but their always seems to be someone around me who wants me to feel just as miserable as they are.:eek:

She gets so much clothes when she has her giveaways that I went over their and took a few items that are a size 1x and I could fit all of them and it looked good on me:whoo:So I kept them!! She won't miss them.:mad:

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I would never tell my sister about my lapband. I know she would never have anything positive to say about it. So you are not alone have relatives who don't get it!

Just try (I know it's hard) to be teflon when it comes to her comments. She clearly has some of her own self-esteem issues since she asks you if she should get a lap-band. And sometimes when you're down on yourself the easiest thing to do is lash out at someone else's confidence. The old, if I am miserable, I am going to make everyone else miserable too!

I can relate to both of you. I have a sister that seems to have a problem with the lapband too. She knows of someone else that had the surgery and her comments were "yeah right, how dumb is that to have to wait 30 minutes before a meal and 1 hour after to drink something, who is going to be running to a Dr. to get a needle every month". I didn't say a word about it because she doesn't know I had the surgery but her negativity towards our friend was enough to help me decide not to tell her about my band. I didn't do it out of shame only that I don't feel like having all the people in my business and beside she has commented on it more than once about banding, she lost weight on her own about 100 pounds but she has gained 15 to 20 back so far and has been trying all summer to lose the weight but she has re-discovered the fact that she loves food. Don't get me wrong I will tell her one day about my surgery but when I reach my goal or come within 20 pounds of it. My husband and kids agree that I shouldn't tell anyone in the family not even my friends, they all want it to be our little secret for now. My point is just continue losing the weight. Buy you clothes that make you feel good. Misery loves company. Love yourself regardless, do what makes you happy. Family can be cruel and we will all have one or two jealous one's in the family but lose the weight and walk with your head up high.

Well, I just found out yesterday that I'm likely dying as my prognosis is poor.

Yeah, that's what my sis is telling my friends back in Iowa. I didn't tell her about my surgery, my other sister finally told her about a month ago. Within an hour of discovering I had lost weight my oldest sister joined WW after throwing a fit because I was taking the easy way out vs. dieting.

Yesterday I received a phone call from an old high school friend. She was extremely concerned and wanted to know if I needed anything. I said no, did she? She said she heard. Heard about what, I asked? My WW sister is going around telling everyone that I went to Mexico for surgery and now I have complications due to going to a filthy hospital in Mexico and it's not looking good.

Did I mention I haven't talked to this sister in 2 years?

Sheesh... you'd think she would have filled me in on the claim that I'm likely gonna bite the dust. I really would have like to have known. :eek:

People are whacko.

Well ladies, if I had it to do over, I would not have told my two sisters-in-law. Questions upon questions. And I am not saying that they are asking me if I feel ok, or is there I can do? No, first question-----"Well, Clara, how much weight do you want to loose". Why not ask me straight out how much I weigh and you won't have to do the math and tax your tiny pee brain!!!! Now she is pissed at me because I was upset by the question. Best thing is to keep it to yourself.

My WW sister is going around telling everyone that I went to Mexico for surgery and now I have complications due to going to a filthy hospital in Mexico and it's not looking good.

I'd like to take a moment to offer my condolences, Wasa, on your impending untimely demise. ...And on having a sister, that by all accounts is a dizzy twat.

<p>I can definitely relate to this. My older sister is so jealous of my younger sister for having gastric bypass surgery. She constantly make hateful comments about her to me all the time. When I told her that I was having the lapband, she got so jealous. The first thing out of her mouth wasn't about me and my situation, it was about her. She said, "I guess I'll be the fatest one the the family!!" This was put to me in a tone like it was my fault she was fat. I said that she could have the surgery too. I was told, "I don't want to do it that way!!" She is also a nurse, and knows so much more than everyone around her about anything to do with health issues. My sister remains angry at me to not taking her medical advice that she doesn't like my surgeon. I was told that I don't respect her professional opinion.</p>

I'd like to take a moment to offer my condolences, Wasa, on your impending untimely demise. ...And on having a sister, that by all accounts is a dizzy twat.

OMG! I have to thank you for this! This is the first time I have laughed about this (vs. fuming) since I got the call from my high school friend letting me know my prognosis is so poor.

And to think, I was so young. :)

At least you will look good for the viewing!!!! Nice and thin, do you think your sister will still be jealous????

Her first claim when she found out was that I lied. There is no surgeon in Mexico that does lap bands and I never had the surgery. No surgeon, no Mexico, no lap band, no weight loss. So I made sure someone sent her a recent photo.

Now I'm dying.

I'm sooooo tempted to send her all my fat clothes and tell her I hear she needs them. I certainly don't. But that would be mean and I don't want to do that. Well, I WANT to but I won't.

Hopefully I'll lose the rest and maybe even plastic surgery before the viewing. Yes, I want to look good dead.

I wonder if I suffered?

My condolences to your DH, WasaBB. Can I have your treadmill and stores of protein supps?

I promise to go to the viewing and make oinking noises behind the twat sister. I'd be happy to deliver all your fat clothes to her at her hotel and say you expressly wrote in your will that they go to her.

Nah, you didn't suffer. The filthy Mexican Doctor gave you some filthy Mexican drugs that eased the pain at the end.

Damn, you were young and damn, your boobs look good in the box!

You crack me up.....I know everyone say LOL but I actually did! Thanks, I needed a good laugh! You are so unselfish making me laugh in your condition!

My condolences to your DH, WasaBB. Can I have your treadmill and stores of protein supps?

I promise to go to the viewing and make oinking noises behind the twat sister. I'd be happy to deliver all your fat clothes to her at her hotel and say you expressly wrote in your will that they go to her.

Nah, you didn't suffer. The filthy Mexican Doctor gave you some filthy Mexican drugs that eased the pain at the end.

Damn, you were young and damn, your boobs look good in the box!

Hey Faith, you can have the treadmill AND the Bowflex that is still in the box (since I don't know what to do with it)! Sure, you can have my protein stuff too! Just got some cool new flavors. I only wish I would have had the time to try them myself. :)

Aren't filthy Mexican drugs supposed to be better than filthy US drugs? I'm so glad I didn't suffer. That would have made me sad.

You know, the great thing about plastic surgery is that really, size has nothing to do with genetics. I was going to go for my old "C" but I'm thinking... maybe I should go for a XXXD? Of course, nobody would be able to see my face while I'm in the box but that's okay. I don't wanna pay all this money for boobs just to have someone notice my face.

'sniff 'sniff... so glad I had friends.

You crack me up.....I know everyone say LOL but I actually did! Thanks, I needed a good laugh! You are so unselfish making me laugh in your condition!

Well, you know... I was always very unselfish about making people smile, even in my condition. I was a very giving person that cared more about the feelings of others than my own dying pain.

Damn, you guys make it too hard to be so angry with her. I'm laughing too hard to be as annoyed as I was this morning.

My WW sister is going around telling everyone that I went to Mexico for surgery and now I have complications due to going to a filthy hospital in Mexico and it's not looking good.

Did I mention I haven't talked to this sister in 2 years?

Sheesh... you'd think she would have filled me in on the claim that I'm likely gonna bite the dust. I really would have like to have known. ;)

People are whacko.

maybe you should call her and tell her she's out of the will ... :omg:

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