so what would be the next step after the whole online dating thing didnt work out?

i am so rusty at all of this....

@@Daveo Try other sites. Don't give up! Try contacting women who you wouldn't usually think as "your type".

@@KristenLe I am on the free sites too but there are a lot of weirdo's on there!

@@KristenLe I am on the free sites too but there are a lot of weirdo's on there!

True. Very true.

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@@Daveo online dating is very frustrating, clearly you didn't meet two women who had any potential... Don't let a women who likes hanging with you use you, be smart... Trying other sites is always an option, we have to have hope while not easy at times....While others will disagree with the following, I think online dating tends to attract many immature game players... With all that said many have met online so it gives us all hope that online dating may work out.

"We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them"

Einstein

Edited June 6, 201610 yr by nyteacher125

I have been sending messages to women who are not they type I usually go for yet nothing is coming back. It's either they don't respond or they move on. Getting frustrating knowing I'm going to be 40 soon and still alone.

I have been sending messages to women who are not they type I usually go for yet nothing is coming back. It's either they don't respond or they move on. Getting frustrating knowing I'm going to be 40 soon and still alone.

What do you say in your messages? What dating site? I was where you are at 40 too and then met my BF a year later and we've been together going on 7 years.

@@Daveo I got no hard evidence to prove this other than my gut, I think many of the paid website say we have X amount of member... What they don't say is we have X amount of active members... I'm convinced that when your membership runs out they still keep your profile up just for appearance... That's why when I end my membership I delete all my pictures... This is just my theory based on the following, on a free website like plenty of fish I get a good amount of messages a day... That sounds better than it is as many of the message are not from people that would appeal to me... I have been on a good amounts of dates from plenty of fish... I was on match for three months, got I think a total of 5 messages and 1date... Now I'm not ms.america but that seems to be too much of an extreme difference for there not to be something weird... While all this might sound discouraging before you put the blame on you, consider other things... While I'm looking for men, so I'm not an expert on the women on these sites other than what I hear men say... Not that the pool of men I interact with speak for all men but dinner ***** has been a popular description... Please don't lose faith, a dating break maybe in order...

My point was your not getting answers to some messages maybe be simply because that person is not an active member.

Maybe this is just the case here in NY.

"We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them"

Einstein

Edited June 8, 201610 yr by nyteacher125

@@KristenLe I'm on POF and OKCupid as well as Eharmony. I just say hi and that I read their profile and would like to talk with them. Eharmony is guided so it's predone for you.

@ the messages I do get back are usually from fake accounts and/or women you pay for. I try to keep my head up but it's just hard sometimes.

@ daveo... I totally hear you, I'm in a similar spot myself... At the moment dating for me is on the back burner as I'm pre-op for surgery so I'm not looking for anyone new, just working with the left overs lol...they only thing I would say as advice from a women's point of view is... I get tons of hi messages, some get answered some don't... The messages that usually get my attention is when someone brings up something from my profile like if they say I see you like the beach so do I... I usually respond to that type of message because it shows the guy went beyond looking at the pictures and took the 30 secs extra to read the profile... I also think it's a confidence thing, you sound a defeated right now so that may be coming across the screen... I hope this advice is helping... It's meant to be encouraging, I'm a better talker than writer... Keep us posted

"We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them"

Einstein

Edited June 8, 201610 yr by nyteacher125

@ the messages I do get back are usually from fake accounts and/or women you pay for. I try to keep my head up but it's just hard sometimes.

There are definitely alot of scammers and posers on sites. I actually only did 2 sites specific to "big" women. I was not optimistic but figured I'd try and see what happened.

I met my husband on Craigslist. I kid you not. I did all, I mean all kinds of dating sites. I was tired of paying for dead ends. Sure I went on a lot of dates, but then I would see the same people on all of them. I felt like I was done. I said this is my last try for a long time. Sat down and wrote an online ad on Craigslist. Posted it in 3 close areas.

Met about 5 guys. Still didn't click with anyone. Got in close to 100 emails. Then my husband emailed me. I was on the fence to even reply back because his email was choppy. Kind of cute picture, but no sparks. Probably because I was calling it quits again. I later found out he used speech to text and it wasn't picking up the first word or two. Lol

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Find single meet and greets in your area or use a different dating site... you never know who you will find and where it will happen.

@@Daveo, why are you sending out requests to women that aren't your type? If they aren't your type, do you really want a response from those type of women? Probably not. I'm about to be 34 and never been married, in women years I think that's considered old by society to not ever have been married lol . But my advice to you is do not ever settle. So what that youre 40 or almost forty,( sorry I can't remember what age you said ) but never get too anxious where you settle for someone just to try to ease loneliness because trust me it's nothing worse than having someone and you can't stand being around them lol. She will come along, but make sure "she" is the real thing, not a fake substitute to get over your feelings of loneliness and getting older. I'm not being harsh, I promise I'm saying this out of love, I've just been there before and it's not fun. I'd rather wait or be single forever than be with the wrong one .

Edited June 10, 201610 yr by MissB1982

@@MissB1982 I understand what you are saying, I guess I just felt like maybe I should see what other women could offer outside my type but that hasn't even had any success. I've kinda left the whole dating site thing alone for now.