I am sharing this video even though it made me mad.

I was expecting it to be more helpful than it is based on the fact that the website that posted it is one that I normally respect.

Instead of helpful, I found it condescending and almost mean spirited: especially in bashing weight loss surgery and online communities.

What do you think?

What do you wish she would have said instead?

As someone who has had WLS and may still be struggling with food addictions, what kind of help do you need?

What, if anything, good did you learn from this video?

http://www.fitwoman.com/blog/2016/04/28/bariatric-surgery-treatment-binge-eating

I learned that if you are mentally ill, you are really screwed. And I would not use her as NUT. She said there wasn't any long term studies on success, and that's flat out not true. I really hate when someone takes a dogmatic, "Stay off the web" stance. I don't mind the cautions, but her recommendations are too extreme. But to her credit, she seems to specialize in working with hard case eating disorder people. I don't think her advise applies to anyone who is more "normal*."

*Everyone is "normal" until you get to know them.

It is the dogmatic attitude that got me, too.

I don't know if she is just really caffeinated, or if she likes having her eyebrows pushed up so far but I had to listen rather than watch.

agree about the dogmatic attitude. and I agree with OKCPirate (of course- as we all should have a general policy to do so) her advice seems to be more appropriate for not your average WLS patient. I have a friend who was not honest in preop about a history of eating disorders - and it has caused extreme problems for her in the years since surgery. It has been painful to watch the repercussions. It is very important to address any issues before surgery, and then you will still have things surprise you that you didn't realize were a problem until later, and then more help is needed. But, it is NEVER too late! If you are struggling with any kind of eating disorder, find help! you are not a failure.

*normal is a setting on the dryer.

Bless her heart.

She's the quintessential "dietitian" -- ex-sorority rush chairman, ex-cheerleader. And has always, always, always been skinny. Absolutely zero experience with overweight or obesity. And condescending as hell.

"You're fat. Get used to it."

In my experience, they are all like this.

I agree with you Inner Surfer Girl, she was condescending and a bit mean spirited, especially when it came to WLS forums. I noticed she spoke in an even tone throughout the video, but raised her voice and changed tone when saying the word "fail or failure". She had a few good tips like finding a mindful eating forum, ect. I could tell right away that she isn't a big supporter of WLS in general.

What was disappointing to me was that there are so few resources for us. Good eating disorder therapists for obese people, let alone for those of us who have WLS are rare. It's not WLS/bariatric programs that are behind the eight ball in my opinion. It's therapists who have the specialized skills and knowledge to work with post-WLS (or even pre-WLS folks).

To hear someone who specializes in this area seem so close minded is just disheartening.

I still think that many of us can benefit from a good therapist or counselor. I just wish they were easier to find.

What did I learn from watching the video? The importance of personal grooming and brushing your hair before appearing on camera.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G925A using the BariatricPal App

Based on my own experience and watching others go through this process, I've come to believe two of the most essential components to success after WLS are 1. self-awareness 2. the ability to make good decisions for yourself.

It was made very clear to me pre-surgery, and many others who have shared their stories with me, that the surgery is a tool. My pre-surgery process was very thorough and covered the many factors that contribute to a person reaching a weight that qualifies for WLS. Anyone who thinks having WLS guarantees achieving long-term weight loss with no other effort or intervention is deluding himself. Perhaps there are some practices that don't do enough to make sure patients are good candidates, but I believe the majority do. They want to have successful patients so they can grow their business!

I also think what she said about long-term studies is ridiculous. People dropping out is a problem with ANY long-term study. Duh.

I think the other tips she gave, like eating mindfully instead of counting calories, can work for some people. I really don't think she should assume they work for everyone.

I also think online forums like this are helpful for a lot of WLS patients. This is where self-awareness and the ability to make good decisions for yourself come in. When you get advice on forums like this, consider the source, obviously. You're not getting advice from medical professionals. You're talking to other people like you. It should be obvious what things you should check out or even just ignore.

And when someone gives you advice about anything, you need to remember you know yourself better than anyone. You should be able to judge whether something might work or just isn't right for you.

So yeah, I definitely think the whole tone of the video was off.

Edited April 28, 201610 yr by gpmed

I admit, i didn't watch it.

However, I do have something to say about eating disorders, mentally ill and WLS. There is a huge spectrum of issues and I think it is a big mistake to think we are all the same, or that we are in the same state of "readiness" to change our lives. I was not diagnosed with an eating disorder, but by the time I was sleeved, I was a pretty hard case of "disordered eating". I can STILL be like that at times. I am upset about something in my home life (my effing grown sons not picking up after themselves or helping out is starting to really get to me). Because I don't know how to get what I want out of the situaiton without creating a riff, i am swallowing my emotions. I chose that word intentionally because I notice i am eating more, i seem hungrier, but the truth of the matter is that I want that "numbing feeling" I used to get from eating. I don't think I am actually more hungry - but rather I am seeking that thing that food used to give me. That sounds like an eating disorder to me - right? And yet, I am maintaining a healthy weight, healthy labs and a good life 4.5 years post sleeve so I am maybe not a complete loser.

I wish some of the stigma around "mental health" issues would just freaking go away. @@OKCPirate has talked openly about some personality issues and being conscious of ourselves in the world. That frankness has made me think more about it too and i think has helped me .. it's all part of the "leave the shame behind" track I am following. I actually asked a counselor last year if she thought I had a personality disorder (like borderline or whatever) - we had a long conversation about it and I was very relieved by the discussion. I also realized that in the past I would have never had the guts to actually face that possibility.

anyway, bringing it back around to WLS. I genuinely believe there are 3 key factors

1. Lifestyle/habits - are you active? do you know how and regularly make healthy choices and get your butt moving? I think most people THINK this is their biggest problem area but in my experience it is the easiest of the 3 to change.

2. Physical changes brought on by obesity - this is where WLS really helps alot. I was over 300# and was completely "owned" by my physical hunger until I was sleeved. This is the launching pad for being able to change #1 and maybe #3 too.

3. The mental health/emotional health issues - like my story of stuffing down things that I really NEED to express. This one is probably the hardest to solve and I suspect will be an issue for me forever to some degree or another. How many places besides WLS forums can we have these kind of honest, I don't have anything to hide kind of discussions?

anyway, bringing it back around to WLS. I genuinely believe there are 3 key factors

1. Lifestyle/habits - are you active? do you know how and regularly make healthy choices and get your butt moving? I think most people THINK this is their biggest problem area but in my experience it is the easiest of the 3 to change.

2. Physical changes brought on by obesity - this is where WLS really helps alot. I was over 300# and was completely "owned" by my physical hunger until I was sleeved. This is the launching pad for being able to change #1 and maybe #3 too.

3. The mental health/emotional health issues - like my story of stuffing down things that I really NEED to express. This one is probably the hardest to solve and I suspect will be an issue for me forever to some degree or another. How many places besides WLS forums can we have these kind of honest, I don't have anything to hide kind of discussions?

YES YES and this is why y'all are now my tribe.

@@Inner Surfer Girl

I see her video as advertisement to gain clients for her business. Trying to convince her audience that her professional opinion and resources are the end all and be all of the bariatric community.

OK, I will go back and watch it, but if this person believes that you should not reach out to the internet and community support, why is she posting on the internet??????

OK, I will go back and watch it, but if this person believes that you should not reach out to the internet and community support, why is she posting on the internet??????

Because she wants you to know she's *certified* and you aren't.

Oh -- she's also a *certified personal trainer.*

OK....so I watched it.

She sure had a lot to say for someone who did not quote any researchers, resources, or statistics. I totally disagree with her caveat to avoid bariatric communities. I think this forum is awesome. My bariatric brothers and sister have helped me beyond measure, and I intend to hang around forever.

She reminds me of my nutritionist who maybe weighed 98 pounds soaking wet.

Her emphatic statement that no one who has WLS gets to a normal weight was a doozie.