OK, I give....

[gowalking 10,790]

That's it...I give. I can't... I've been struggling to not gain back weight. For a few months now, I've been saying each and every morning, 'today I will make good choices'. And more often than not, I am eating more than I should. I presumed it was stress eating, head hunger, happy new relationship overeating, blah blah blah.

Turns out, I'm just plain hungry. Went to see my doctor and told her of my struggles. I've gained ten pounds over the last six months. Some of my clothes are getting tight. I refuse to buy anything that's going to accommodate weight gain. My doctor explained that the fat cells aren't gone..they're just dormant. And now, they are waking up again and my body is begging to gain weight back again. She swears it's biological and not emotional. I feel like I'm failing and she tells me that failing is not doing anything about this new found hunger, and not requesting a fill.

So...Friday will get my first fill after nearly three years banded. I'm both troubled and relieved. This reminds me of when I recently had surgery and went off my anti-inflammatory meds. Was in so much discomfort that I couldn't even walk standing straight. All my joints hurt. I couldn't believe how much the meds were keeping me pain free. The band needing Fluid is sort of the same thing I guess. I'm not 'cured' from overeating and obesity. The band manages my hunger enough for me to make good choices. Without it, I'm back to square one. I have to think the same about the band as I do about the meds I take. Prevention in order to not suffer from my arthritis, or my obesity. It really is a disease...and not a vice.

[parisshel 1,892]

I like your analogy and it seems pretty spot on. Your surgeon sounds wise! And a big bravo for you in recognizing that you needed to use your band rather than continue to struggle (and feeling bad about this new hunger).

I'm sure you'll get an excellent result from a fill, certainly considering that you lost so much weight without a filled band! Here's to re-finding that "just banded" feeling of restriction/hunger dimming. What a relief that will be, to not have to white knuckle your way through the day.

Good for you for taking action! Let us know how you do with the fill.

[Julie norton 2,850]

Good luck Liz!

I am also just starting again with fills. I was empty for 8 months and sure enough 8 pounds came back.

I'm not used to being hungry after almost 9 years so it is somewhat of a struggle.

Had a small fill last week just to start and will be getting another next week. I do like how we can adjust our bands. Nice to hear a pro band sentence, huh?

My personal choice is to not get it too tight as I think it can cause complications down the road.

Onto another banded adventure... I have faith that I can drop those 8 lbs

In due time????

[JustWatchMe 7,117]

I recently went for a fill and came away without one. Because I get stuck a few times a month, we decided my band is filled enough. My hunger stays away for about four hours, sometimes longer. My stall - a YEAR -- is due to food choices and lack of exercise.

So two weeks ago I gave up fried food (mostly. I indulge in fried Thai noodles about once a week). I haven't upped my exercise yet mostly because my knee hurts like hell and I'm waiting to get my cortisone shot. One hundred pounds down is all the band will "give" me without more effort on my part. This last fifty is going to take stricter food choices and lots more movement.

We are complex creatures with complicated bodies. I'm grateful I've kept off the hundred, but bouncing in and out of Onederland is getting frustrating. Thank God the band is doing all that it does. I've never been the same size in clothes for twelve months in a row. It's new territory for me.

Be gentle with yourself, and as odd as it may sound to you, you may need a few fills to get to green. Most of us have needed several. I needed 8. Take your time, go slowly, and cut yourself a break. It's okay. It's part of how we take care of ourselves now.

One more thought. My body's idea of normal is morbidly obese, where I've spent most of my life. I've pulled it out of that world and dragged it kicking and screaming into Onederland. It tugs back. I pull again. It's war, I tell you!!

You got this!

[Elizabeth68 25]

Good luck with your first fill after 3 years! You've been so successful thus far! BTW, take a step back a sec and look at your sentence about how you've gained 10 pounds in 6 months. I assume you were like me before the band where i regularly seemed to gain that much but never did anything about it. Bravo to you!

[meggs353 118]

Thanks for this post! Very interesting about fat cells never going away, just becoming dormant.

Please keep us posted and let us know how it goes. We're all routing for you! I'm hoping you'll be pleasantly surprised to see your hunger dim. The band is an amazing tool.

[gowalking 10,790]

Thanks for this post! Very interesting about fat cells never going away, just becoming dormant.

Please keep us posted and let us know how it goes. We're all routing for you! I'm hoping you'll be pleasantly surprised to see your hunger dim. The band is an amazing tool.

FYI...Dr. Ren is my surgeon as well.

[meggs353 118]

I remember that! She's great.

[gowalking 10,790]

The fill took less than a minute. Even injecting into the port now tucked behind the abdominal muscle was seemingly no big deal. I drank a cup of Water and have since had Soup and am now having coffee. So...liquid is going down fine.

Dr. said to see how I feel over the next few days and to come in for another fill if I don't feel satiety.

[meggs353 118]

So far, so good! How much of a fill did they give you? Who did the fill?

[gowalking 10,790]

I got 3 cc's and Dr. Ren did it since it was my fist fill and she had to go into the muscle.

[Bandista 7,466]

For me it always takes a little while for a fill to settle in -- I never feel it right away. Just thought I'd mention that in case you wake up feeling just the same as yesterday....I always have to give it time and then it's subtle, like, oh, it's been six hours and I haven't been thinking about food. Or halfway into a small portion of food, Bing! That feeling of being done.

This seems like a good place to bring up post-fill protocol. My surgeon has none -- I drink the glass of Water in the office and kind of hang around a bit just in case. But no all-liquids, etc. This worried me because some other people have days of liquids then on to full liquids and mushies just like post-op.

And now that the weather is changing I think I may be a little "tight." Not sure but I may go in for a pow-wow over this. And I've just had my two year anniversary and want to see new blood work -- not really because of band nutrition issues (I eat very well) but because of the arthritis medication I'm using. Self-care!

Have a great weekend, all. We are going an hour away to shopping world -- picking up stuff for a party we are having tonight. Mexican Night!

[gowalking 10,790]

For me it always takes a little while for a fill to settle in -- I never feel it right away. Just thought I'd mention that in case you wake up feeling just the same as yesterday....I always have to give it time and then it's subtle, like, oh, it's been six hours and I haven't been thinking about food. Or halfway into a small portion of food, Bing! That feeling of being done.

This seems like a good place to bring up post-fill protocol. My surgeon has none -- I drink the glass of Water in the office and kind of hang around a bit just in case. But no all-liquids, etc. This worried me because some other people have days of liquids then on to full liquids and mushies just like post-op.

And now that the weather is changing I think I may be a little "tight." Not sure but I may go in for a pow-wow over this. And I've just had my two year anniversary and want to see new blood work -- not really because of band nutrition issues (I eat very well) but because of the arthritis medication I'm using. Self-care!

Have a great weekend, all. We are going an hour away to shopping world -- picking up stuff for a party we are having tonight. Mexican Night!

Thanks for letting me know about that Bandista. I don't feel any different and am considering going to mushies rather than liquids again today. Will now reconsider this as I know I should follow protocol. One more day of liquids won't kill me. I'm looking forward to that feeling again of being done. It's been a while. Enjoy your shopping...enjoy Mexican Night.

[WLSResources/ClothingExch 3,443]

@@gowalking -- Thanks for sharing a good reminder and a good lesson.

I've 'always' known that the fat cells lurk beneath the surface, biding their time and waiting to be refilled. If you think about it, it's foolhardy to think they've moved to another town -- like geometry, there's no royal road to weight control.

@@Bandista -- Not all practices observe the same protocol. I was banded at Columbia UMC, where I'm told to stay with liquids the rest of the day following an adjustment and then soft foods for at least part of the next. It's open season after that unless an individual's body signals to go more slowly.

Edited November 14, 2015 by WLSResources/ClothingExch

[gowalking 10,790]

Hallelujah!! The fill is working. I realized on Tuesday that I wasn't grazing and looking for something to eat. Same yesterday. In fact, I probably had too much for dinner...I was a bit uncomfortable.

Today in the lunchroom is a goodbye Breakfast for one of our admins who is leaving and there are Bagels, muffins, and other assorted calorie laden things. I had 1/4 of a bagel with a thin smear of cream cheese and am now eating my plum at my desk.

Feeling back in control again. I do hope this lasts. Anyone who thinks the band is just about the head and not the belly doesn't understand the band. I'm amazed at the difference between being hungry all the time and then having the hunger monster gone. If I hadn't had an adjustment, I know I would have continued to gain and gain.

Thank goodness for this tool I have....and thank you friends for your words of advice about waiting for the fill to kick in.