My daughters returned home from college a couple of weeks ago. One was out of state and one was out of the country. Yesterday they both gave me a stern lecture about my eating habits.

It took me aback, but I realized they are right. They watched me basically reclaim my life last year and drop 100 pounds, which is 2/3 of my excess weight. I made enormous life changes and they were part of it.

But since that time, I've gotten complacent. I deluded myself into thinking that the recent changes I made in exercise (joining a gym and actually going) were enough to offset the food choices I was making.

My girls pulled no punches. They told me if I kept eating the fried and fatty food I've been eating, sooner or later the weight won't stay at this number anymore, and I'll regain what I lost. I'll gain it all back and go back to my old way of living.

I was shocked, but I can see their point today. I haven't wanted to change from fried food to broiled food. I haven't wanted to give up these delicious things, and I rationalized it by calling it Protein. Well, protein battered and deep fried isn't protein, it's protein soaked in fat.

My younger daughter said I need to train myself to like healthier versions. I need to train my palate to enjoy home cooked broiled chicken instead of Popeye's fried chicken strips. I need to make my own chili instead of drive thru Wendy's chili.

I'm doing 1000 times better than I did before WLS, but they are right. Unless I change what I'm eating, the dramatic reduction in the quantity I'm eating will have only partial and temporary effect.

I still have a lot of "I don't wanna" going on here. I don't wanna give up my high fat, high calorie foods. I already gave up volume! It isn't fair!!!

Well, true. It isn't fair. Too bad. If I stay in this mindset I'm going to return to the high volume as well.

My kids saw the food wrappers from Popeye's and Wendy's in my car garbage bag. Just like the old days. But but but I'm not eating as much and it's protein!!! Yeah. Right.

I was surprised at how angry and how disappointed they were with me. I sat there defending my 100 pound weight loss. They weren't buying it. Both of them told me they saw me deluding myself right back to where I started.

When they both came home from school, I had made a big Pasta dinner with dessert. Both of them yelled at me for bringing pasta and sweets into the house. But but but it's for you! Yeah, right. Both of them told me to cook for me, not for what I think they want. They didn't want the calories or sugar either.

They both pointed out that I don't cook anymore. Which is true. I get takeout and eat weird pieced-together meals. They encouraged me to cook instead of takeout. Simple and obvious, right? But I have a million excuses why I need to grab fast food.

My girls watched me get my life back last year, and it started with my surgery. They came with me when I left an abusive marriage and began the long battle of a divorce with their uncooperative and hostile father. They were really upset with me seeing me make crappy food choices after so much positive change.

I'm still taking this in, but I realize this is the kick in the ass I need now. I cut my volume. I added exercise. Now I need to lose the fried and high fat and high calorie crap.

I had mentally adjusted to this weight as if it was inevitable that I wouldn't be able to lose my remaining fifty pounds. Well, I can lose it. But it takes the next change to get there. A big change.

I don't wanna. But I gotta.

Man, they are a pain in my ass.

@@JustWatchMe Love this post. You can try easing into this change so it's not as scary. Maybe start with staying away from fried foods at dinner. After you get comfortable with that, then start changing lunch.

I have a problem with grazing that I'm working on improving. Right now, I'm focusing on sticking with 3 meals and 2 Snacks. Once I can stick to that consistently, I'm going to cut down to 3 meals and 1 snack.

Brilliant idea. I've actually started making the changes with lunches first. All week so far my lunches were brown bagged and healthy. My younger daughter got a summer internship at the company I work for, and we take lunch together. We've been going to the park close by and eating our lunch there. So that's been an immediate change. Dinner this week was better most days, but not every day. Progress, though. I feel better already.

Changes can happen gradually and you sound like you are trying hard. Old habits are hard to break and you are confronting a lot of issues... Ex-hubby, divorce,kids(love them so much, but not so much in my house anymore)Diet, exercise.

Pat yourself on the back for doing such a good job... On life, and on raising caring thoughtful children!!!

The truth hurts, but when provided through love, I find it hurts a bit less. Your daughters are brave and I love that they had no qualms about telling you that you own your own weight loss destiny. Makes me think about my current situation and owning what I'm not doing that is contributing to my personal disappointment. Thank you for the encouragement.

Wonderful post!!!! Your girls rock! And they are so right. If you need to recondition yourself, here's a link to a site that teaches you how to reset your surgery by going back through all the phases in just a week or so. There is a pay option, but all the info is there for free if you poke around. I haven't tried it myself, but have read good reviews. http://www.5daypouchtest.com/index.html

And speaking of Panera, for those of you on maintenance that can eat a few more carbs, check this out: quinoa, lentils, kale, spinach, and chicken – are you kidding me? 390 calories of ridiculously healthy food! And it's pretty darned tasty.

Lentil Quinoa Bowl with Chicken

Chicken raised without antibiotics, organic quinoa and organic brown rice, lentil blend, tomato sofrito, fresh kale and spinach with a lemon wheel in our umami soy-miso broth.

390 Calories; 9g Total Fat; 1370mg Sodium; 48g Total Carb; 8g Fiber; 33g protein

Doesn't it suck that the restriction feels like it disappears after a while? I try to remember a word of advice from my surgeon...sit at the table, not in front of the TV. Eat a meal for 20 minutes. When time is up, you're done. I also have measuring cups everywhere--everywhere! My issue has been that my carbs creep up when I look the other way. So I've been logging in MFP religiously. It helps me be honest. I loved your post!