I really need help. I'm almost two years out. I'm not eating or exercising like I should and alcohol has also added weight. I "know" what I need to do but I need help doing it. Started exercising again on Monday.

PS... Lots of change in my life and just now getting on track -- divorce, going from being a stay at home mom to a FT employee, etc.

This book has really helped me:

http://www.amazon.com/The-Beck-Diet-Solution-Person/dp/0848732758

It taught me behaviors and ways to talk to myself about weight loss and healthy eating that combat cravings, defeatist thoughts, etc. There are some things in it that really don't work well for wls patients, but those are easy to identify and work around. It doesn't give you a diet to tollow -- you find an eating plan that works for you. It is more about how to be motivated and successful. Since you say you know what to do but you can't get yourself to do it, perhaps it could be helpful to you, too. Good luck!

I really need help. I'm almost two years out. I'm not eating or exercising like I should and alcohol has also added weight. I "know" what I need to do but I need help doing it. Started exercising again on Monday.

PS... Lots of change in my life and just now getting on track -- divorce, going from being a stay at home mom to a FT employee, etc.

It's great that you recognize that you need to tighten up your eating. Just want to remind you that it is normal for your weight to increase a little at about this far out from surgery.

I think all, or most of us, reach a place where sometimes you just get "tired" of the continuing effort to lose or maintain. I'm four years out, lost 100 pounds, regained about 27 pounds in year 3 and used 5:2 intermittent fasting to relose that weight. It can be done and just knowing that others are there WITH YOU is a great tool to use!

You CAN do this! Just start today, one day at a time, and go back to your basics and regain your equilibrium. I guarantee you will start to lose the excess. You may have to WORK at it but it's so worth that feeling of accomplishment. Even more than the initial weight loss.

Good luck and stay in touch!

Thank you. I do realize that some weight gain is normal but my eating habits prove that I'm not where I need to be. Thanks for the encouragement. I do need to get back the basics again. At the gym now!!!

Edited July 24, 201412 yr by smithpy

This book helped me a lot-- not saying I'm totally "cured" of impulsive eating, but I've stopped most of it and don't feel like I'm struggling:

Cynthia Alexander "Emotional First + Aid" (the bariatric one).

Hi smithpy--so sorry you are struggling. Those major life stressors can (and do) derail us big time. BUT, you are NOT IN DENIAL of the reasons for your weight gain, and that is something to pat yourself on the back for!!! You are taking ACTION!!!You have gotten great words of wisdom here so far from the above posters (as we all always do!). Please remember too, though, that you first have to get your responses to all the STRESS in your life under control before you can recommit to your WLS healthy eating habits and lifestyle. (You know-- Are you paying attention to how important it is to be GOOD TO YOURSELF EVERY DAY? Moms tend to put ourselves last, and that usually means zero time for US. Do you meditate? Do you do deep breathing? Do you take a fun short-term class/workshop? Do you meet a friend? Do find a self-help book of interest? Do you enjoy nature? Do you sing a motivational song, even if you can't sing? Do you journal? Do you buy some dumb little special thing for yourself once a week? Can you have just 4 hours a week that can be JUST YOU time that someone cares for the kids? etc etc? ).

Only you know the answer to this, and of course it is not expected that you respond in any way to this here. Please do not take offense--you mentioned alcohol, and I'm sure you are aware of the potential of transfer addictions with WLS patients. Just wanted to offer a caution.

You don't say how old your kid(s) are, but get them on the bandwagon with you, and create some FUN stuff to do together--both in healthy meal prep AND with fun exercise activity. Don't go this alone. This is a TEMPORARY setback, and you will clean up your habits and move on to your healthy lifestyle again! You go girl. . .

I think all, or most of us, reach a place where sometimes you just get "tired" of the continuing effort to lose or maintain. I'm four years out, lost 100 pounds, regained about 27 pounds in year 3 and used 5:2 intermittent fasting to relose that weight. It can be done and just knowing that others are there WITH YOU is a great tool to use! You CAN do this! Just start today, one day at a time, and go back to your basics and regain your equilibrium. I guarantee you will start to lose the excess. You may have to WORK at it but it's so worth that feeling of accomplishment. Even more than the initial weight loss. Good luck and stay in touch!

That is a very true statement about losing the focus during the third year. It has been happening to me a bit lately. While I try and eat as I have during year 2 (very clean), a lot of carb snacks are sneaking in. And I am not talking about uber bad carbs, but like some extra fiber one here, some bare naked granola there and a ritz cracker over there. Pita chips are getting to me also. I really like those Stacy pita chips and can munch them on and off during the day if not careful. No dessert type stuff though or candy. No weight gain because I exercise every day, but don't like at how I am gravitating towards snacking without a second thought. It is almost impulse and automatic and seems to pick up when I am under a lot of work stress (which has been more often than I like recently). I need to double down on my commitment towards a healthy diet to support optimal exercise before this snacking gets the best of me. I just do not say no to temptation as well as I used to before year 3. Maybe I am getting tired of it...

Edited July 25, 201412 yr by Fiddleman

I think the veteran forum has been a great place to collect thoughts from people years out. I think any fantasy I ever had that weight management was something that had an end point has been utterly shattered.

I am doing good but my current life stress has definitely brought out some food issues I didn't realize I have still...

Anyway you can get back on track. It's the same way you originally lost weight ..One day at a time...

This book helped me a lot-- not saying I'm totally "cured" of impulsive eating, but I've stopped most of it and don't feel like I'm struggling: Cynthia Alexander "Emotional First + Aid" (the bariatric one).

I got that book about a year ago and forgot I had it. Cracking it back open today. THANK YOU.

Hi smithpy--so sorry you are struggling. Those major life stressors can (and do) derail us big time. BUT, you are NOT IN DENIAL of the reasons for your weight gain, and that is something to pat yourself on the back for!!! You are taking ACTION!!!You have gotten great words of wisdom here so far from the above posters (as we all always do!). Please remember too, though, that you first have to get your responses to all the STRESS in your life under control before you can recommit to your WLS healthy eating habits and lifestyle. (You know-- Are you paying attention to how important it is to be GOOD TO YOURSELF EVERY DAY? Moms tend to put ourselves last, and that usually means zero time for US. Do you meditate? Do you do deep breathing? Do you take a fun short-term class/workshop? Do you meet a friend? Do find a self-help book of interest? Do you enjoy nature? Do you sing a motivational song, even if you can't sing? Do you journal? Do you buy some dumb little special thing for yourself once a week? Can you have just 4 hours a week that can be JUST YOU time that someone cares for the kids? etc etc? ). Only you know the answer to this, and of course it is not expected that you respond in any way to this here. Please do not take offense--you mentioned alcohol, and I'm sure you are aware of the potential of transfer addictions with WLS patients. Just wanted to offer a caution. You don't say how old your kid(s) are, but get them on the bandwagon with you, and create some FUN stuff to do together--both in healthy meal prep AND with fun exercise activity. Don't go this alone. This is a TEMPORARY setback, and you will clean up your habits and move on to your healthy lifestyle again! You go girl. . .

Honestly I hadn't thought about focusing on stress relief but you are right if I learn to manage the stress it may help manage the eating triggers. The kids and I are going to attend a counseling works support group which starts in Sept.

No offense about the alcohol. I'm aware of the research and that does worry me which why I brought it up here.

Thank you all for your words of encouragement. I did "better" this week but still a way from back on track.

I know the feeling. I am three years out now and maintained my 100 pound loss for two of those years. For the last almost year though, I have gained 12 pounds. I have been bouncing back and forth between 141 and 147 since about October of last year. I would tighten up some and get back to 141 and then it would slide again and I would be right back up to 145 or higher in a couple of weeks. It would take a few months to lose the 5 or 6 pounds only to find it back again after only a week of eating whatever I wanted. I have to learn that I cant just eat carby snacks and think I wont gain!

I am back on track as of today. My NUT told me when I was trying to lose the last 12 pounds in a month (when getting to goal in one year) that it was possible, but I had to eat 30 carbs or less a day. She told me to get at least 70 grams of protein and no more than 30 carbs--didnt matter the calories. It did work, I must say. I did reach my goal in three weeks from that day and kept it off for a whole year by eating high protein. I did snack some but it wasnt out of hand. Now, its out of hand. I dont snack every once in a while, I snack daily and graze a lot. I guess it is really feedback, not failure. I can see where I am going wrong. Its a hard habit to break though.

I set a new goal to have this extra weight back off by Halloween. That gives me about 7 weeks. I made a ticker. I logged my food today on mfp. I have set my goal and I am determined to reach it no matter what else is going on in my life. I have three jobs and school part time. I am one busy woman and snacking and bad food choices seem to go with that lifestyle really easily. I think to reach the goal, I need to prepare a little better so I am not stuck with bad food choices due to not having good choices readily available.

I wish you luck on your journey too. Maybe if you made a specific goal and made a ticker, started a challenge or some such, it would give you jump start you need to get that extra 20 back off. HTH

Here is what i think. Statistically, people experience some weight regain 2-3 plus years post WLS. We have lots of anecdotal stories to go with that and i believe it happens with all the surgery types.

Those of us that keep a positive mental attitude (ie don't just give up, all or nothing thinking, or beat themselves up too bad) generally find a way to whittle those pounds back off, or stop the regain at some sort of "reasonable" amount.

It is the story of nearly woman over about 40 that i know... they battle with at least some weight (maybe it is only 10#, maybe more). It is part of life, we must accept it and have a plan for tackling it.

I was happy at my goal of 158. I was estatic when I got to 150. I didn't plan to get to 140, but once I was feeling better I started liking it. I have regained up to 145# and while i am okay with it, i liked it better 5# lighter. If that little feeling of disappointment creeps up - I pull out my collage of before, during and after. I realize that even if I wind up back at 158 somehow, I still look and feel damn good!

So, I think this battle of the 12# or 20# or whatever is really really normal and we can all support each other in ways to work it back off... and more importantly support each other in learning to not let it be too distressing either.

If I keep gaining I will likely be one of those posting this type of topic... you have my permission to throw my own words back at me.

It is very common with veteran sleevers. In the beginning, it's so hard to eat, and we are full from such little amounts of food.

It's like I can't ever relax and expect to keep maintaining. All it takes is a few snacks and I am up 2 lbs, and if I don't get right back to basics, it's 2 more in no time at all.

It's depressing. They way I look at it though, it's much easier to lose 10 than 100. I still have my tool and I know how to use it. Willpower is something that we have to have if we expect to live in everyone else's world.

My Np told me weight gain bump was normal. I too gained but found out I got gerd etc. it explains my situation. Plus not getting the protein and water for me. I was Thinking that I was always hungry as well. I got a ppi Like nexium. Etc.