I wonder how many of us have kept this a secret from others and how that works. I am struggling between not telling anyone but my mom and husband, and telling everyone in hopes of perhaps helping someone who needs help or inspiration.

I am basically a very private person. I told my 3 children and my husband. I did end up telling my brother and sister in law because they were over for Thanksgiving (Canadian) and I just had my surgery on the Friday. Other then that I'm not telling anyone else and I asked all of them to not tell anyone either. (my docs know of course)

I told lots of people, friends, familiy, strangers in line at the grocery store. I have a friend at work who had bypass and told our colleagues that she lost weight on a "milk diet". We are all different in how comfy we feel about telling. Either way is good.

I told family, my boss and 2 friends....now everyone knows...they won't shut up asking questions and watching if I lost weight I hate it....now I have 3 people followng suit and in a chance to compete because they are not that big

my dad is the only one who knows,I didnt even tell my 16 year old son

I Was Banded July 11 06.iam Below Goal,wear A Size 6.when Someone Ask I Tell Them.i Have Talked To People At Church And Told Them And They Don't Remember.i Talked To A Girl The Other Day That Was Going To Have It Done And She Didn't Know I Had It Done She Had Hers Done About 2 Weeks Ago.so It Really Doesn't Matter Who Knows Are Doesn't Know,it's Your Choice.

I think more and more people are becoming informed about the banding surgery and realize it isn't as drastic as they may have previously thought. In fact, the few people I have told know someone who has been banded, and even give me envious looks! I think that once the weight loss starts becoming obvious, I will tell those who are closest to me. If someone really looks distressed, wondering HOW did I do it - I will for sure tell them, because they will probably want to do it too!:gossip:

I've told my parents, brothers and SIL, co-workers, and half a dozen of my closest friends, and I have not had a single negative comment. There was a bit of concern from my parents about going to mexico for surgery, but no "easy way out" or "why not just try WW" or anything like that. Everyone has been incredibly supportive and excited for me. I was not sure if I was going to mention it to my co-workers, but since I decided i was taking 3 weeks off from work, I had to say something and decided on the truth. Also, I've decided that it's very good for me to have the accountability of my co-workers knowing I'm banded, because I to eat a lot of bad stuff at work. I work nights, and we all tend to do a lot of fast food, sugar, caffeine, etc to get through the nights.

The day may come when I regret telling people, but so far I have had nothing but support and encouragement.

:wacko:I was not going to tell anyone, but then someone asked me why I was having surgery. I said "I'd rather not say." They looked down at my belly and said "does it have something to do with a band?" That's when I figured out I might as well tell everyone who will listen since it will hopefully be obvious after I lose a bunch of weight!!

Only my husband.

a secret is a secret until you tell one person. The band is part of me now and I would no sooner ask someone if they are wearing false teeth than I would about their weight. But it seems socially acceptable to make comments about peoples weight loss. Usually meant as a compliment and I am sure with a little bit of envy. My answer is usally "thank you, I appreciate that you noticed". If the question "how" comes up, my response is "oh the usual way" unless I feel my personal information may benefit someone then I will talk about the band. All my family and friends know of my decision to have the band.

a secret is a secret until you tell one person. The band is part of me now and I would no sooner ask someone if they are wearing false teeth than I would about their weight. But it seems socially acceptable to make comments about peoples weight loss. Usually meant as a compliment and I am sure with a little bit of envy. My answer is usally "thank you, I appreciate that you noticed". If the question "how" comes up, my response is "oh the usual way" unless I feel my personal information may benefit someone then I will talk about the band. All my family and friends know of my decision to have the band.

Oh my gosh - that makes so much sense! You wouldn't comment about someone's teeth, would you? That's the best analogy I can think of! Thanks!

I'm scheduled to be banded in January and I'm already thinking about this. Overall, the reaction has been positive. Of course, only my family members and close friends know about it as of now.

I'm stuggling whether or not to mention it a pretty close friend of mine that I used to date (known him a total of 2 years now...so not a long standing friendship). Although not physical anymore, we have remained good friends. For some reason, I'm having the most issues trying to decide to tell him about the surgery. I mean, the next time we go out for lunch and I can't eat the sushi that i LOVE, I'm pretty sure he'll wonder what's up. Nevermind the recovery time and liquid/mush diets that follow directly after the operation! I'm just not certain how he'll react and I'm not sure if I want to deal with negativity (if there is any). Any suggestions? I think dating as a whole is going to be different after I'm banded...I fear I may become slightly jaded. lol. Like I wasn't good enough to date when I was fat, but I'm good enough now?! Schmucks.

I've heard others say it's an easy way out, and although I disagree with that comment, I'd just assume save myself from the debate. I figure when people start noticing and asking me how I've lost weight, I will simply say I started eating smaller portions and cut certain things out of my diet...all of that with some regular exercise and voila. heehee. It's skating around the truth, and I hate not being completely honest when people ask. There shouldn't be a stigma attached to this. Who knows, slowly but surely I'll have the confidence to say "eh, screw 'em...I'm healthier now, who cares how I got to this point! The important thing is that I'm here!"

I've been considering surgery of some sort for 5 years and am now booked solid for Dec. 29th and feel so good about it.

There are some at work I wish didn't know because the claws have come out along with the "taking the easy way out" comments. Suddenly there are diet comments all over work ... I'm way beyond "diet" thank you very much! LOL! My idiotic sister knows since my Mom told her (could have lived without that) and her first comment was "are ya gonna die" (not that I've planned thanks though).

I have become so stressed out because I expected support, not a kick in the shins, but weight is a really easy thing to be judgmental about. But I'm on my way for ME and that's what counts. I plan to sit at my son's high school graduation next year in a folding chair and not worry that its going to collapse under me. At that point, the person sitting at work pointing fingers will be a distant memory

Hi: Your decision is for you and your health. If support is not forthcoming from your family and friends, remember the bandsters are there to help. We will give you all the support we can muster. Our answers may not always fit your needs, but at least we are hear to listen. Good luck. Doddie

So far, only my mom, sister, brother, 2 friends, 2 co-workers and my boss know. I think my mom told my aunts and that is okay with me. My boss knew I was having surgery but I didn't tell him what it was until today and he was great. I knew he would be but I was still afraid to tell him. I feel much better now that he knows.

I don't want others at work to know because I am afraid of the comments and my reaction. I am a very defensive person and it might get ugly.