As you can probably tell by how long I’ve been a member here, I’ve been considering VSG for a long time. My husband has never exactly been on-board with it; he’s naturally very thin, and can eat whatever he wants without gaining any substantial weight. Since he’s never really been willing to hear me out on VSG, I’ve tried everything else under the sun to try and get my weight under control. In 2011 I did Medifast. Over the year, I managed to lose 100 pounds. Over the next year and a half, I managed to gain back every last pound.

I talked to my husband last night again about VSG, and he was not terribly supportive of the idea (as usual). He doesn’t like the idea of me having surgery, and he is also of the opinion this is somehow taking the easy way out and I should be able to just do this on my own. He feels like I “quit” on Medifast, and that we wasted money because I gained it all back. I tried to explain to him that it’s not losing weight that’s the problem…it’s keeping it off. I’ve tried and tried, and I *can’t* stay a normal weight. I am just not able.

I’m not a snacker, and I don’t eat a bunch of junk food. I’m a vegetarian (15 years), don’t have high cholesterol, etc. My problem is the speed and quantity at which I eat. If my husband and I are having pizza, I will be on my 4^th slice by the time he’s finishing his first. I literally inhale my food. I don’t chew, I don’t wait for it to cool, and I eat so quickly and so voluminously that I feel ill. I’ve tried to consciously slow down, but even my “slow” is fast to most people. And I don’t know the meaning of the word “full.”

Through all my research, it seems like VSG would be the best option for me because it would force me to slow down (lest I get sick!), and I physically won’t be able to hold as much food. I know you can “eat around” the sleeve, but like I said I’m not a big snacker or junk food eater so I don’t worry about that so much. I feel like the sleeve would be a good tool to help me control my portions and give me that sense of when to stop that I’m *supposed* to have.

Since my husband feels like I “quit” at Medifast, he thinks I’m going to “quit” on the sleeve. He thinks I’ll just gain it all back, and we’ll have “wasted” all that money. I know he wants to be supportive and he wants me to have something that works, but he just doesn’t know what it’s like to have a problem with food. It’s impossible to understand if you haven’t been there. But he raises a good point, and one I feel is fair to ask—how IS this different from Medifast or anything else I’ve tried? Will it just end up being another “waste of money”? How will this help me succeed where other plans haven’t?

Please, any insight you can provide would be so appreciated. I just want to be healthy again.

Don't you know' date=' everything's bigger in Texas? Especially the people? [/quote']

When I read this is cracked me up lmbo. Im from Texas to. That is sooooo true.

You have already gotten a lot of really amazing advice on this, and I just wanna add my 2 cents. First, let me say though, you're super pretty! You look so much like one of my cousins, it's kind of uncanny. =p

Whatever you do, don't give up on this. I think one thing that is glaring to me is that your husband doesn't really understand. And frankly, he's never been heavy, how can he really wrap his head around how hard it can be to stay thin, even if we can get there with diets? Have you considered asking him to go to a meeting post-op patients, or maybe having him talk to someone who is a 'veteran' to VSG. I know that if my significant other was considering surgery, I would be scared - even if I knew it was low risk. Maybe confronting some of what's going on or really exposing him to what VSG is about will help. When I was trying to get my parents on board with mine I made a huge list of pros and cons, listed out all the side effects, got as many reviews on my doctor as possible, asked them to come to my appointments ahead of time so that they could meet and talk to him. It made things go much easier. I'm not sure how your doctor is, but mine is a soft spoken guy who seems to put everyone in the room at ease.

As far as the note that wls hurts relationships, I know my situation is a bit different because I met my boyfriend pretty early post-op, but as I have lost weight it has actually helped my relationship. I have more confidence, more stamina, and I want to do more because I don't feel nearly as socially anxious. My point is that it can 100% go the other way, not always make things more difficult.

I hope that you find a place that gives you some good financing. You deserve this =)

Thanks for the sweet compliment, and great advice

Yep. It's a 100% exclusion, regardless of medical necessity. Pretty stupid considering how much less they'd end up paying overall if I got rid of my comorbidities!

How is it even legal for a health insurance to exclude a health condition 100%?!! Despicable.

How is it even legal for a health insurance to exclude a health condition 100%?!! Despicable.

It's actually not the health insurance companies, it's the employers. They request specific exclusions to pay less for coverage. It's not only WLS that they can request to have excluded, it's other types like breast reduction and any other type of procedures that won't kill you today, maybe tomorrow but not today.

It's all about the bottom line.

That. is. FU##ED. UP. Our health insurance situation is criminal and an embarrassment. They are effing crooks, treating humans like meat puppets.

Sometimes it is the insurance company. I work for a very larger insurance company that covers everything, and still had to fight with Aetna for 18 months. I was made to go through 9 months of nutritional counseling, even though the policy was 3 months. I had a bmi of 49 but no comorbities, so I was told I was too healthy. I ultimately ad to hire a healthcare advocate and threatened to sue after being denied twice.

I'm getting all my pre-op testing (chest x-ray, EKG, blood tests, etc.) done this afternoon. I'm *tentatively* scheduled for surgery on 5/22 (assuming I can get all my tests cleared before then). I am over the mooooooon!

I'm getting all my pre-op testing (chest x-ray, EKG, blood tests, etc.) done this afternoon. I'm *tentatively* scheduled for surgery on 5/22 (assuming I can get all my tests cleared before then). I am over the mooooooon!

And that is the upshot to self pay! You go straight to the front of the line. No insurance BS.

Congrats! Just make sure you let your PCP know what is going on so he/she can be proactive in your follow up care.

Wow! Hathery this is awesome!!! You went from sounding pretty down and hopeless with no support yesterday to having a date scheduled today!!!! You are amazing!! It goes to show that when we women REAAAAAAALLLLLYY want something, there is no stopping us!!! I am really proud for you and I truly believe that your husband will wonder why it took him so long after you both see your health improve and your overall outlook on life just soar!! CONGRATULATIONS!!

I had my PCP's nurse schedule all the pre-op stuff and she did my EKG, so she knows exactly what's going on. She was really sweet and supportive, and told me how she wishes she could do it too since she has had a lifelong weight problem. I suppose that's why she was so amazingly accomodating when I told her why I needed all these tests

That is so excellent! Sounds like all your ducks are lined up! Next stop, pre-op diet!

I had my PCP's nurse schedule all the pre-op stuff and she did my EKG, so she knows exactly what's going on. She was really sweet and supportive, and told me how she wishes she could do it too since she has had a lifelong weight problem. I suppose that's why she was so amazingly accomodating when I told her why I needed all these tests

I'm so happy for you! Good luck!

As you can probably tell by how long I’ve been a member here, I’ve been considering VSG for a long time. My husband has never exactly been on-board with it; he’s naturally very thin, and can eat whatever he wants without gaining any substantial weight. Since he’s never really been willing to hear me out on VSG, I’ve tried everything else under the sun to try and get my weight under control. In 2011 I did Medifast. Over the year, I managed to lose 100 pounds. Over the next year and a half, I managed to gain back every last pound.

I talked to my husband last night again about VSG, and he was not terribly supportive of the idea (as usual). He doesn’t like the idea of me having surgery, and he is also of the opinion this is somehow taking the easy way out and I should be able to just do this on my own. He feels like I “quit” on Medifast, and that we wasted money because I gained it all back. I tried to explain to him that it’s not losing weight that’s the problem…it’s keeping it off. I’ve tried and tried, and I *can’t* stay a normal weight. I am just not able.

I’m not a snacker, and I don’t eat a bunch of junk food. I’m a vegetarian (15 years), don’t have high cholesterol, etc. My problem is the speed and quantity at which I eat. If my husband and I are having pizza, I will be on my 4^th slice by the time he’s finishing his first. I literally inhale my food. I don’t chew, I don’t wait for it to cool, and I eat so quickly and so voluminously that I feel ill. I’ve tried to consciously slow down, but even my “slow” is fast to most people. And I don’t know the meaning of the word “full.”

Through all my research, it seems like VSG would be the best option for me because it would force me to slow down (lest I get sick!), and I physically won’t be able to hold as much food. I know you can “eat around” the sleeve, but like I said I’m not a big snacker or junk food eater so I don’t worry about that so much. I feel like the sleeve would be a good tool to help me control my portions and give me that sense of when to stop that I’m *supposed* to have.

Since my husband feels like I “quit” at Medifast, he thinks I’m going to “quit” on the sleeve. He thinks I’ll just gain it all back, and we’ll have “wasted” all that money. I know he wants to be supportive and he wants me to have something that works, but he just doesn’t know what it’s like to have a problem with food. It’s impossible to understand if you haven’t been there. But he raises a good point, and one I feel is fair to ask—how IS this different from Medifast or anything else I’ve tried? Will it just end up being another “waste of money”? How will this help me succeed where other plans haven’t?

Please, any insight you can provide would be so appreciated. I just want to be healthy again.

My husband was very apprehensive too. I had NO health issues and he didn't want me to risk doing something that would be harmful. I made it clear that I'd made a decision and would love for him to be on board. I spent six months in support groups and reading every single thing I could find on sleeve surgery. He has become my biggest cheerleader. I have two things to say to anyone who thinks having 85% of your stomach removed as 'the easy way out'. First, big deal. Second, this is not a magic bullet. I do NOT feel like I'm on a diet now, but I still have to make wise choices. Forced Portion Control was perfect for me, and I'm not hungry. Ever. What I call my 'new hunger' started at about 12 months out, it's an empty feeling, something I can ignore. It just lets me know I probably need to put something there soon. When you are not hungry, it is much easier to resist temptation. This is the best decision I've ever made for myself. Not one single minute have I regretted it. Make sure it's right for you, and realize there are a lot of head games we play with ourselves along the way!!!

Well, pre-op test is done. The funds are in my bank account. Now I just have to have my surgeon look everything over and make sure there isn't anything weird on my tests (God forbid!) and I'll be having a phone call with him next week Wednesday to go over all the final details. Assuming everything is a go, my surgery will be 5/22. Wow. I am so looking forward to my new life. I've been sick and sad for too long, and I"m ready to be happy again!