Hi everyone,

I'm waiting for my sleeve to be done in November. I keep going back and forth about it. I wake up in the morning thinking "no way am I going through with this,... it's too extreme..." Then, as the day drags on, I change my mind and think about all the time I've wasted being fat and inactive, letting life go by. I've gone back and forth like this for months while waiting for my official date to be sleeved. I don't know if this is normal or if it's a good idea go through with the sleeve if I'm not 100% behind it. I do know that I'll probably never lose the weight any other way. It's so depressing. I keep thinking what a loser I am that I have to cut my stomach in order to lose weight, that I'm not strong enough or discipline enough to do it the "regular" way. Just need to talk this out...

I think this is normal, Optimist01, to go back and forth... at least that's what I have been telling myself about my own see-sawing. I am see-sawing back and forth about sleeve or bypass.

I used to see-saw about whether or not to have surgery. I am not a big mirror person. In other words, I never, I mean NEVER look at my own reflection in mirrors, windows, chrome, nothing! I know I'm obese no need to confirm it by looking at my reflection. I recently took pictures of myself... well, those pictures show me that I am a LOT larger than my mind sees me! So the see-saw is over about surgery or no surgery. From my own history of yo-yo dieting I know I need a tool to lose this weight. Heck, I took Chantix to stop smoking after 42 yrs, I was finally ready to stop smoking and it worked. I see this surgery as my 'Chantix' for weight loss because I am finally ready to make the commitment to lose weight forever.

In my heart I know the answer just as in your heart you know the answer. Sometimes we ask questions because we need to hear others' validations for our decisions. Good luck to you.

I just read something in a book that said "Comfort zones don't have to be comfortable - they're just familiar". I think the struggle with whether to have the surgery or not can be tied to that statement in a sense. Being overweight is something we have known as our normal for years and years. Imagine your life outside that comfort zone. There are hundreds and hundreds of people on this board that are a testiment to the fact that we can have a new comfort zone.

Most definitely. But I'm tired of hiding and not living my life the way I want. This will be a painful and long process but I'm ready!!!!

2013 is my year....SD 12/3/12 BK NY

I felt like this too. I just had surgery last Friday. One minute I was excited, the next I felt I was going to vomit. In my case, I did the one step at a time, and tried not to think aboout it too much. I know, easier said than done. But it really helped. For the last few weeks, I just focused on what I needed to do, enjoyed my last meals, and kept thinking about Thanksgiving, where for the first time EVER, I won't feel like everyone is looking at me and noticing how much weight I've gained since last thanksgiving when I saw them.

I pinned workouts, clothes, and inspirational quotes on my Pinterest boards. Oh, and buying clothes a couple weeks before for a pre-planned cruise cemented my decision. I went home from my usual places like Kohls and Ross in tears several times cause I was too fat for the clothes I want to wear. I sucked it up and bought some clothes in my size, (ugh!) but decided that was the last time I'd cry because I was too fat for average size clothes. All I can suggest is every time you think of a reason to have the surgery, write it down, and pull out the list when you have doubts. In my case there were so, so many reasons to have it than not to.

I go through the "I can't waits" to the " what if I die?" several times a day. I actually found and pulled out a life insurance policy I had and forgot about and gave it to my husband. Needless to say, he was not pleased.

Thats a good idea of writing a list as to why you should have the surgery and why you shouldn't and you are right, I bet the list as to why I should have it will be longer than the list as to why I shouldn't! Most of why I shouldn't would be fears, most of why I should would be valid health reasons.

My problem is a double edged sword.. I have 2.5 months to research and talk to folks who have had or are planning for it like here on the boards but the also I have 2.5 months to over analyze everything and drive myself nuts!! LOL

I go through this a lot. My surgery is Sept 17th. I have never had surgery for anything. So this is my very first time. My mind is racing a mile a minute. With fear, happiness, scared, elated....etc. So I am just trying to stay positive. I watch/read stories others have written about their surgery and my emotions change. Some stories make me think "this is why you are gettting the surgery" and some that I see make me think "is the surgery really necessary" I keep telling myself yes because i am 30, 5'3, 302lb and i have a family that needs me (husband and 4 children). I would like any and all prayers as i am going through this journey.

I am the same way - mine is scheduled for next Wed @ 7:30 am some days I'm excited & other

days I'm like what am I getting myself into, you read stories & you start to wonder but then I bring myself back to reality, everyone's experience is their experience - I will have my own - everyones body is different & will react differently... Right now I'm day 5 liquid diet & i already can't wait for the day I can't actually eat something other then a little piece of carrots & shakes & Water

Good luck! You're in the home stretch!

I got a car loan, so I no longer feel guilty about getting the surgery done. I was going back and forth before trying to decide to get a car with the money I had for the surgery or not. I tell you, having almost decided that I would have to put off or cancel the surgery made me want it even more. So, I am done second guessing myself.

I really want to be able to play with my kids and

not worry about not being able to get up off the floor without help. Also, while I don't have any of the typical comorbidities, most of my family does and I don't want to just continue on til it's my turn. My sis is only 2 years older than I with diabetes, a fib and has already had a mini stroke. I am more scared of a stroke than I am of having the surgery done, so I think I'm set.

I hope you are able to decide what is the best for you. I think I won't freak out again til I get to Mexico. Of course, I still have two months to have the doubts creep back up on me!