I am so pissed off right now!

This morning I got dressed feeling proud of the progress I've made since having my surgery and went shopping for some clothes for my daughter.

I walked into a shop and started looking through the racks when I noticed one of those 20yr old anorexic waif-like shop assistants staring at me....I continued looking at the clothes when all of a sudden she snuck up behind me and said........."you know we only cater up to a size 14(US12)" .....aaaarrrrggghhhhh! :angry

I replied "I know"........then she said "so what can I help you with then?"

I said "you can help me by getting the manager of the shop". She then went and got the manager and I told her that I was actually looking for clothes for my daughter and that I was prepared to spend a lot of money in her shop but after being treated so rudely by her staff I was going to shop elsewhere....(it was a real Julia Roberts/Pretty woman moment...."Big mistake"!)

Don't these people realise I could be shopping for my daughter, neice, sister etc......am I not allowed in their shop because I am over a size 14 (US12)?.....who do they think they are...the size police!

H O O R A Y !! The store REALLY does value their reputation!! Im so thrilled you followed thru!! Im sure they will get it corrected. It just takes the committment to let the right people know!!

AMEN and GOOD FOR YOU!! So glad to hear you stuck to your guns and followed up. Again, age is no excuse for bad service. Just today I was teaching my 4 yr old son to hold the door for the ladies coming in. Good manners and respect is taught early in life. It's easy to pick out the kids that have been raised with high morals and integrity.

I'm no longer going to be apart of a board that allows moderators to treat members as they do. JoJo came to us to vent. She didn't ask for opinions, advice and certainly not to be attacked. Can't you just say that sucks or too bad that happened... or nothing at all? No, you would rather defend someone you've never met and never will over a fellow bandster. In true lapbandtalk form a simple "my day sucked" had to turn into a debate started by a moderator.

I know I'll get bashed (also lapabandtalk form) because I don't post on average 12 times a day, but I had to say my peace. I'm glad you got your voucher JoJo even their corporate office thought you got treated badly!

Stephanie...

I hope you don't get bashed for stating your point of view, but I also think you might be over-reacting just a wee bit. Jo Jo is loved and supported here, as are we all, but there will never be 100% agreement among the "family members", here or on any board and that's okay. The suggestion that the sales clerk might be entitled to the benefit of the doubt did not constitute an attack on Jo Jo. It was just a different perspective.

Jo Jo, I'm glad you got that voucher. It says a lot about the store and how much they value their customers.

Years and years ago, when my only weight problem was keeping my jeans up without suspenders, I was in some company's HR dept. filling out a job application. There was another girl there, doing the same thing, but for a different position. (I was a key punch operator...anyone old enough to know what those were?) After the other girl left the HR manager turned to me and said, "It's so hard on me when they're heavy. I can't put someone like that on the reception desk." I was speechless! So hard on HER??? What about the poor girl trying to find a job? It's true...fat people are second-class citizens.

stefunny.....You are right....I did come onto the "Rants and Raves" to vent....that's what I though this section of the forum was for.

And I must admit when certain individuals started defending the shop assistant and insinuating I was being "paranoid" or "taking it personally" at first I was a bit ticked off because unless you were in that shop with me you have no idea how I was treated (besides when someone rolls their eyes at me I don't think I'm being paranoid) and I didn't want someone shoving their "holier than though" opinions down my throat......I just wanted to VENT!

But to be honest some people can't help but play "devils advocate" or "taking the moral high ground".

If that works for them, then good on them:clap2: ......it doesn't work for me so I just ignore them.

The manager did NOT apologise....which pissed me off even more. She just stood there looking uncomfortable.

I think the shop is an Australian chain store it's called.....SUPRE.

It really caters to women under 30yrs and the size 14 is equivilant to a size 10 in other stores....so it was pretty obvious I wasn't buying for mysel.......but the shop assistant made me feel like I shouldn't even be allowed to step inside their precious store because I was too big!

BTW I forgot to mention she also rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the manager...little cow!

Yes it is an Australian store called Supre...and they were actually on a current affair here a few months back with the same problem. A larger customer walked in and they told her you will not fit into our clothes, so this person got very upset and offended and took it to the media and it was all over the tv. They do not have a good name here in Australia at all and i would never shop there for that same reason.

Hope you feel better......

fee....I had no idea it had happened before...are you sure it was the same store???

And Thanks...I do feel better after taking action and speaking to Supre management....the gift voucher didn't hurt either:)

You know that is one of the reasons I am so sick of being overweight! Although the people are wrong in doing what they do it is soooo embarasssing to have things happen to me like that. I was on an airplane going to California once and the stewardess waits till everyone is on the plane and sitted then comes up to me and asks do you need an extention? I could of died! I had to wonder since I was one of the first people on the plane why she had to wait for everyone else to get on before she ask such an embarassing question. Some people just wake up and go though the day finding ways to be AHs.

fee....I had no idea it had happened before...are you sure it was the same store???

And Thanks...I do feel better after taking action and speaking to Supre management....the gift voucher didn't hurt either:)

yep it was def SUPRE.....cause i walked past the shop and looked in there and thought to myself.....what rude pricks.....

I have to dress at work, so on the weekends, I typically have on a pair of shorts and t-shirt, I make very good money,

and have went to very nice stores only to be snubbed, because i was not dressed, to the nines, When i was ready to drop a couple of hundred on some clothes,

MISTAKE BIG MISTAKE

Jojo, I am so glad this was resolved to your satisfaction and that you have the voucher. It was the least they could do.

I'm no longer going to be apart of a board that allows moderators to treat members as they do. If you feel I, or any other moderator, has treated a member poorly, please feel free to report it.

JoJo came to us to vent. She didn't ask for opinions, advice and certainly not to be attacked. How was she attacked? JoJo, did you feel attacked? I understand maybe put off at not getting the responses you were looking for, or not feeling "supported" (or whatever the right word here is), but did you feel that I attacked you? As for not asking for advice & opinions, how many threads do you think get posted each day where the person doesn't ask for advice & opinions, but gets them anyway? Tons. Tons & tons & tons. It's kind of what happens on a messageboard full of diverse people.

Can't you just say that sucks or too bad that happened... or nothing at all? Sure, I could. Or I can offer another perspective. Can't I just say what I think? This is Rants & Raves, right? So is only the original poster allowed to post their opinion, and everyone else has to follow suit?

No, you would rather defend someone you've never met and never will over a fellow bandster. Well - I've already said I wasn't defending the person, I would have no reason to defend the person, but OK. As for "...over a fellow bandster" - that's not accurate. For one, it's not my situation, and as such, it's something I certainly wouldn't pick sides over, so to speak. Even if it were to be a situation for picking sides, regardless of the context or setting, the fact that the person has a lap-band, and I have a lap-band, doesn't mean I'm going to (or should) pick their side.

In true lapbandtalk form a simple "my day sucked" had to turn into a debate started by a moderator. Where's the debate? Did I say anything inappropriate? Did I say anything against the rules of the board? Because I'm a moderator, can I not have an opinion? Can I not offer an alternate point of view, especially in the Rants & Raves section? Is there some rule that says I can only post things immediately positive & fully supportive of whatever the original poster's perspective is?

Actually JoJo, I apologize to your for my last message because it may detract from your thread. If you would like me to move it out of your thread, please say so and I will do so ASAP.

WAY TO GO JoJo!! Good on you!!!

I'm SO GLAD you did that. Because not only does actions like that have a ripple effect in society, but you feel better having done it.

How many of us are madder at ourselves for not saying or doing anything after the moment is gone? I know for one I get more upset with myself for not standing up for myself and that lingers.

I don't think that given a different point of view is either bashing or attacking. I don't think that getting a young person fired is the best option available, but some do. Are the people who do feel that the firing of the sales-girl rights any more valid than mine?

I once had an elder relative tell me, “if you can't say something good, don't say anything”. That is nonsense. That is not support. That is catering. Maybe that is why the sales-girl and many young people today are so screwed up. Nobody ever told them anything was wrong.

People learn by listening to all sides of a story. Maybe the girl in this case was insensitive. Maybe she has two children and no husband. Maybe her kids will go hungry because she is young and insensitive, when she is fired. I tell an insensitive sales-person when they are rude. I don't tried to get people fired because as bad as my pain was, getting even may cause so much more pain.

My grand-daughter is the type girl who was discussed in the opening post. She has the body of a twenty something year-old, the educational brains of a college student, is 18 years old, but has the emotional stability of a 14 year-old air-head. She would make a remark like that without having an inkling that she might be offending someone. I admit my grand-daughter is screwed up and I hope she will outgrow it. I used to try to talk to her, but I have only known her for a few years (she is the daughter of my son's wife from a previous marriage and though I know her since the very late 90's, she has spent more time with her father in a different city than where I live), so I can not tell if my advice and guidance will sink in. Her mother and grand-mother are not that way, so I assume that she will grow out of it. Of course, none of our children or grand-children are rude or insensitive, just mine and the people in the opening posts.

But more important than that is the idea that not saying what the thread starter wants to hear is not fulfilling our obligations as LBT'ers. If someone is over-eating, I will only say, "Don't worry, things will get better" or "keep trying" in the future, lest I me told that I am unsupportive or hear “if you can't say something good, don't say anything”. I will not give them real advice, like find a support group or seek professional advice.

I promise to be a good LBT'er from now on and just shut-up.