Skip to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.

BariatricPal

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.
  • Appearance

Join BariatricPal free

  • Ask your own questions
  • Reply and follow topics
  • Message other members
  • No cost, no spam

Is Keeping The Secret Possible?

I have decided today, that I do not want to tell anyone at work about having surgery. Lets just say there are a lot of snotty little b*****s who snarl and look you up and down when your eating.your own birthday cupcake.

So, is there any way possible to keep it a secret? Any expieriences? i was toying with saying i was having abdominal surgery but now after today im thinking of taking vacation for a week and not saying anything about surgery. I work a desk job. But we do some lifting of boxes on occasion?

Agghhhb

  • Replies 157
  • Views 25k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Most Popular Posts

  • shangefan
    shangefan

    I assume this refers to my comments earlier. I did NOT chastise you. What I said is that people need not feel compelled to tell anyone about their surgery. If they choose to, great. If not, great. It

  • shangefan
    shangefan

    Sigh! I don't think anyone has an obligation to do that. If it works for them and their life, they should do so. If that isn't in keeping with their personal priorities, they should not. Either way, t

  • I think that depends on your will to keep quiet...with me, I didn't want to tell anyone either, or so I thought...but then I felt excited and confident about it...I wanted everyone to know that I wasn

Featured Replies

I've been talking about exercising and eating healthier, then I'm going to get dx'd with a stomach ulcer which means I'll have a special diet for 2 weeks to prepare for the surgery to repair it. After surgery, I will also have to follow a special diet. I will then decide that since I'm already exercising and now due to the surgery, I'm losing weight, I might as well make the best of it and keep it up!

wow i really dont know what to tell you on this one. go with your heart. i love my job and co workers. everyone there is super supportive and excited for me to get my surgery. ive held back from a few family members but hey who cares what people think. you are doing the surgery for you and only you!! good luck to ya

What I find most interesting about this thread is how many have this idea that lying is a black and white issue: that lying is somehow bad and telling the truth is somehow good.

If someone asks how you lost the weight and you don't admit to the surgery, are you lying? Yes. You chose to answer with a lie.

If I won the lottery and someone asked how I got rich, and I said hard work and investing...you get the point.

But so what? Own your lie. Be proud of it, lying is a skill that everyone should practice. Our whole culture is predicated on dishonesty as a tool for good. Marketing drives the whole economy. Sell the pros, only admit to the cons if you're required by law.

People who ask personal questions deserve whatever answer you choose to give them. It would be like if someone asks your age, or salary, or your sexual orientation, or YOUR WEIGHT. It's none of their business, but you're trapped into pleading the fizifth OR defending yourself with a lie of omission.

Go ahead, youre not under oath. No one is sending you to hell or bed without supper.

That's the point I feel a few of people were trying to make earlier. Don't lie to yourself about the fact that youre lying. But don't feel bad about lying, it's your right as an American. ;)

Personally, I do NOT think it will be a dead give-away. A lot of people do not even have the thought of WLS on their brains.

I only told 3 people. And those 3 people were apart of my "home nursing" team. My family does not even know. Including my own mother.

My co-workers are not snotty but they love to gossip and I knew darn well that telling anyone I even had surgey would be a gamble. Of course my supervisor knew I was out for surgery but she didn't know what kind of surgery. You DO NOT have to disclose the type of surgery your having to your HR dept. It is your privacy. As long as you have the proper documentation from your doctor you should have no issues with taking the time off. Everyone was wondering what I was doing during my two weeks of "vacation" and I just said relaxing. Again, it's none of their business!

I had surgery on July 17th and I'm down 58lbs. I've only had a couple of people come up to me and say "you've lost a lot of weight". Of course they ask what kind of plan I'm on and I keep it simple... Lots of exercise, high Protein, low carb diet. Like someone else said, that is not lying. Your just skipping a "minor" detail. lol. It is what it is.

As far as going out to eat in the car... Unnecessary to me. Why should you inconvience yourself like that!? First off, that's going to get old and secondly it's going to draw attention to yourself. Who REALLY does that!!? Not a lot of people. What you can do is choose to eat lunch at a later time or at a time when a lot of people aren't in the kitchen area or whereever you eat. When I came back to work, I was still on my liquid diet. In fact I rolled up to work with bottles of Clear Liquids. Noone said anything and I didn't bring attention to myself. I sipped sipped sipped and called it a day! Whatever eating stage your on, it's just not that serious to go hide in a corner and eat. Your eventually going to be eating regular foods just smaller portions. For the time being you can eat whereever whenever and just say your on a liquid diet or whatever kind of diet. After all, if all they see you eating is applesauce or apple juice their going to think you lost the weight by being on a crash diet. ;)

I think if your the type of person who goes to work to work and is not there to make friends and spread your business (there's lot of women at my job who do this) for extra attention you should not feel obligated to tell anyone anything about your personal decisions. It's personal and if you do not feel comfortable or do not want to hear negative comments or be the topic of discussion you should hold your head up high and continue to keep YOUR SECRET!!!

Good luck to you!

I told very few people about my new life! The nosey people @ work (so i didnt have to lift) i told them and a few nosey neighbors' date=' I had hemorroid surgery!! LOL i Took my week off, no one asks now how my hemorroids are!!! LOL[/quote']

I like that answer. You made my day

I told everyone. My best friend did not like it and two others told me I wasn't "that big." who were they trying to kid? This surgery is all about me and I share my truth with everyone. Management are just people and after all is done' date=' it is forgotten. Snotty ppl can go straight to hell and hug the devil as far as I'm concerned.

Congrats to all is VSG's! We rule ! :)[/quote']

I love it

Join the conversation

You can post as a guest; create a free account to track replies, follow topics, and be part of the largest weight loss surgery community.

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

Account

Navigation

Search

Search

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.