I have lost a hundred pounds twice already.

Once when I was pregnant. I started out weighing about 180 and got up to 278 before my kid was born. I dropped twenty pounds and him with it, and eventually, about a year later, I was back at 180. 180 is still a bit overweight for me, but I liked what I looked like and I felt good.

But the weight would never stay off. I would go on serious diets to get back down to 180 but would never make it to my high school weight of 155. Good, but not good enough. So I would drift up and then bash it down with pure and total concentration -- low fat, low carb, shakes, drinks, bars. I'd get up to about 230 and panic, smoke like crazy and be afraid to quit, get back down to 210...on and on like that.

Then around 2001 for some reason ( or lots of reasons such as depression, exhaustion, frustration, and various other shuns) I gave up and let myself get up to around 278 again. I just didn't care and refused to go out, and then one day I decided to go on low carb for real and inexplicably was able to stay on it for seven months. I lost 100 pounds and then finished up the year pushing my weight down with low carb and exercise to 153.

I said 153. My hair fell out and grew back. I was a size eight. I really thought i had a handle on the weight thing after that, I thought I'd be a lowcarber for the rest of my life.

So then the same thing happened. I would just get tired of *obsessing* so much about this. I would let myself go out to dinner, eat carbs at night, and did I *really* have to work out for two hours a day every day? I mean how is this possible to keep up month after month and year after year?

So by 2009, I was way over 200 again. 250, 265...my mother died and I went on Medifast and lost 40 pounds for her memorial. I hated the idea that all her old friends would be looking at me and thinking oh, wow, she got fat just like her mother did.

All of 2009 was like that. 220...250...265...240...then 2010 I gave up dieting because I was just so damn TIRED OF IT. I stuck around 250 for awhile but then I got meds for depression, which brings me to a little bit before now: 285.

What I was thinking all through the winter was that I was going to be fat for the rest of my life because I was *never* getting back on that ride again. I would not not NOT keep fighting with my damn scale day after day> I was not going to go through the sweat, blood, tears and obsession over something so completely STUPID only to gain it all back again. Truthfully, *dieting* has been my true career.

In fact, so far I'm not finding the post op diet to be hard at all. Do you know how many times I've done this? How many times I've lived on liquids only, diet shakes, Protein sparing fasts? ALL MY LIFE, DAMMIT. I'm not convinced my metabolism is screwed up but I know my head is. I've learned to dread social outings of alll kinds because I know people will expect me to eat and I can't. People ask me out for coffee, I say no because I can't have a cappucino and a muffin, all I can have is plain Water or decaf with splenda. Or? I weigh 250 pounds and that muffin is no fun anyway.

Insert clockhands moving around a dial to depict me ranting on endlessly into the night about this, but here is what I am really wondering:

Why is everybody so fat all of the sudden? It used to be you'd put a woman who'd lost and gained a 100 pounds twice on a television talk show for people to murmur at. It used to be that a 300 pound person was direly and directly gawked at, it used to be that a 500 pound person was a medical oddity.

Why are we like this and how did we get here? I no longer think the problem is *me* anymore. Or that I was doing anything particularly wrong. I think there is something wrong with western culture or our environments, something they are putting in the water, some kind of mindfuq going on between the womens magazines and the producers of high fructose corn syrup...*something.* Because it's just weird that so many of us, increasing numbers are in the place we're in right now.

Don't you think?

I don't think the problem is personal either. A few months ago (when I was really first thinking about doing WLS) i read the book "The End of Overeating" by David Kessler. He talks about how the predominance of processed food correlates strongly with obesity. And about how addictive the crap is! (more on that in a minute)

Another good one is "Why We Get Fat" by Gary Taubes (shorter take on his "Good Calories, Bad Calories").

I'm not sure I'd blame it all on HFCS, but processed food in general is largely the culprit. And the stupid part of it is that the cheap food is the food that is bad for you! Personally, I think this is part of my problem. Why spend $5 (or more!) on a healthy lunch when I can buy a 99-cent double cheeseburger?

I haven't dieted anywhere near the amount you have, Crosswind, so I'm expecting the post-op (and heck, the pre-op diet too!) to be frustrating. But that leads me back to addiction:

I definitely think that the processed junk works on our systems like drugs/alcohol, etc. I have a co-worker whose daughter is a recovering meth addict. She did a bunch of research on addictions and recovery when her daughter was going through the addiction and recover process and she mentioned to me that there is a 98% chance of relapse. Which struck me as remarkably similar to the 97% chance that I was given as the likelihood I'll regain my weight if I manage to lose it naturally (per my surgeon).

So I think that our bodies and our brains get caught up in the fact that we need to nourish our bodies, but unless we stay 100% on a healthy, non-processed (and probably low-carb) diet plan, our addictions get triggered and we eat the crap food again. In larger and larger quantities, because that's what addicts do. If the crap food wasn't around, I don't think the addictions would be triggered, at least not nearly at the levels they are.

Oh, my other theory is that we fat people are actually evolutionarily advanced. Think of how many famines humans have experienced throughout history. The skinny people never survived famines. Now me, I'm just about famine-proof!

I think a lot of it has to do with fast food. It's good (usually) and cheap. It costs practically nothing to feed your entire family. Kids love it. I love it. The entire nation loves it. Also, the whole, video game/computer, keep your butt inside thing for the kids is continuing the problem into the next generation, and so on. I remember when I was in high school, I was so skinny, like 130 pounds, we all were. Maybe one big kid in the whole class. Today, I see kids in my nephew's senior class and there are only 1 or 2 kids that are a healthy weight. The rest are obese.

You are so right, the world has changed, and not for the better. It might be something in the water. Or at least the milkshakes.

I don't think it's just fast food. Sure, it's a contributor, but look at how much we move today. I am old enough to remember TVs that you had to get up, walk to the TV, and turn the knob to change the channel or the volume. I remember my mother standing for a couple hours a day ironing and preparing food, rather than sticking something in the microwave or heating up something from a box. She did the dishes by hand standing at the sink. She hung the washing on the line. I rode my bike for hours as a kid and walked to school. Now kids are playing video games and everybody gets driven to school or takes the bus.

All the time spent standing and the small, repetitive movements that got us out of our chairs mounted up, I think. I was at my thinnest when I lived in NYC and had to walk to the subway, stand on the subway, walk to work, walk to stores, etc. because it just wasn't practical to have a car...I am sure you all can think of other ways our lives are less active than they used to be.

Great topic! I think the problem is multifactorial, too much processed food, too many chemicals, not enough exercise, etc. But my surgeon told me something that REALLY resonated with me and it was in that moment when I knew for sure that I would have this surgery.

I can't quote him exactly but he said that humans evolved for eons in a world of scarce food and unreliable food sources. We have big stomachs for a REASON.....when we found food, we needed to be able to eat as much of it as we could because it might be a long time before we would find more. We were (and are) hard wired to prefer foods that will provide us with the most energy, honey over celery sticks for example.

Now we live in a food environment that is toxic in it's overabundance and over processed excess, (at least for those of us in our privileged industrialized nations). Unfortunately, we are still hard wired to eat everything we can and to retain those calories even though we are likely not to ever face a food scarce environment. We are fighting our biology and our instincts. My surgeon said a small stomach makes more sense now when we no longer need to "stock up" in preparation for the next famine.

Anyway...that made more sense than anything I had heard and it helped me to be at peace with this surgery. Maybe a rationalization but it worked for me.

Don't you think?

If you have Netflix, try watching "The Beautiful Truth" and "food, Inc". They are both very powerful documentaries about our food, the chemicals we ingest and the effects they have on our bodies - including obesity and even cancer!

I really, really want to go completely organic post Sleeve because of what the food industry puts in our food.

I completely agree about the food supply in the US and the crap processed shit that is nearly unavoidable.

I also have to add, I have lived outside the US for a number of years and only travel back every year or two. Even over the time I've been doing that, food keeps getting bigger and Bigger and BIGGER. I mean, everything is huge. Last time we were there, we went to Chipotle (OMG yum, I would be hosed if I lived anywhere near one) and to a Cheesecake Factory. Seriously GIANT FOOD in GIANT PORTIONS. And cheap! Huge, tasty food that doesn't cost much? Of course people eat it -- I would too if I were there.

Just as one small example -- a thing that strikes me is that a normal coffee cup in the US is literally three times bigger than a normal coffee cup here. Not a huge deal if it's just coffee, but when you add in proportional amounts of cream/sugar/flavorings, that cup of coffee has potentially more than triple the calories a cup here does. And how often do people have a normal cup of coffee? I am always seeing these places with huge mugs that are probably 5-6 times bigger. Also: Huge drinks (soft drinks, ice tea, etc.) -- and bottomless refillable drinks, unless it's diet that just adds in the calories heinously.

And yeah, the other thing that always hits me is how we spend three weeks in the states and almost never do any walking the entire time. It's just not set up for that. Sure, you can deliberately walk for exercise, but it's in many places impossible to walk as a form of transportation or to do daily errands. We are just in the car from one place to the next.

But I can't discount as well all the additives, chemicals, sugar and concentrated sugars like HFCS, hormones, dyes, etc., etc. Who knows wtf all that stuff does to us?

Finally, I think dieting leads to obesity. Not the kind where someone is perpetually going up like 10 pounds over the winter, then dieting in spring in time for swimsuit season. I'm talking about the kind where you gain and lose tons of weight -- there is no way to break that cycle...except, hopefully, with the WLS option!!

I think the thing that's most abnormal is to have to constantly battle your environment to keep food out of your mouth. It makes absolutely no sense that the place you live, that feeds you, is full of stuff that's going to kill you. If you lived a place that had poisoned Water, you'd leave, right? You'd think right, I'm not staying here to drink from the poisoned stream, I'm getting out of here, this is stupid.

It's normal to want more food that tastes good or makes you feel good. In fact it's normal to eat as much of it as you can. It's normal to eat food that's readily available and eat if whenever you want, if you can. Back in the day the only reason to stop eating was that you were out of food or that Urrgh, Sbpabo and UngaUnga were going to kill you if you ate their portion.

Eating food that keeps our engines running cheerfully with no health consequences is a reasonable expecation.

What I really think is that *this surgery* is the wave the of the future. I really do. More surgeons are going to learn how to do it and get better at it, so it's going to get safer. I think we're the early adopters. I mean enough is enough with this.

I agree with everything already posted and I also believe that so many people are on antidepressants that cause weight gain that it is also a big factor in the higher weight that seems so prevalent. I am happy with lexapro- and was happy with celexa, but they both cause blood sugar issues that I know contributed to my weight gain. Seriously- there are so many prescriptions for these drugs that it is in our drinking water!

When I met with my surgeon first time he actually said that my body has well protected me for a famine, while he will die!

Ditto to all that posted before me. I think another reason for the obesity epidemic is the prevalence of two working parents in households across America. It's becoming a necessity for many people to have both parents working. When you've both worked all day it's difficult to get a nutritious dinner on the table during the week. It's much easier to eat out or grab take-out. And, you think, "Hey, we deserve this. We both work hard." What you aren't thinking about are the extra calories, saturated fats, etc. that come with those meals.

Hubs and I both work in stressful, full-time jobs and have a three year old. We've really started trying to think more about those meals during the week. Even if we fixed sandwiches twice a week we'd be doing better by our bodies than the constant eating out. It's a hard habit to break!

This is a great topic. I think a lot of it has to do with the carbs in our diet. I also think that life is exhausting. When you balance, work, kids, friends, and the bad economy, it is very overwhelming. I think a lot of people eat to deal with the stress. I really do believe that overeating is an addiction in many as well.

I wanted to add that, eating out in general (restaurants, fast food, wevs) is also a contributor. Most of even the best restaurants use a lot more butter, oils, carby stuff, than I would at home. And chain restaurants and fast-food places have hideously high calories and sodium and fat and carbs. And don't forget that whole huge "flavourings" and "food enhancements" industry -- which adds sweet eff all in terms of nutritients to food, but massively increases the appeal to our tastebuds and senses...just more chemicals offering faux rewards and making our asses bigger and bigger. Eating out is a total obesity contributor. It CAN be done reasonably and healthily, but without a WLS tool as a helper? It's such an uphill battle that nearly no one wins it.

It really got me thinking - and made sense- that our stomachs evolved to this size when food was not always in constant supply and you needed to be able to eat a lot when it as available.

We are on the cusp of evolution! I will certainly have to tell my surgeon.

How interesting and true what you're all saying. The other thing I'd like to add that food is an addiction for most of us, but unlike other addictions (alcohol, drugs, gambling) we NEED to be in contact with our addiction in order to survive.So we can't give up completely on food, we have to live with it, prepare it, handle it, and try to avoid it at the same time! With alcohol, drugs you can stay away from it completely, and I'm not saying it's easy, but trust me to have the most difficult addiction to deal with