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anxious, overwhelmed, questioning following through...
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So as of right now, my surgery is scheduled for May 6, 2013.
I could have it sooner if I chose a different location, but the surgical center closest to where I live ( still an hour away) and the closest center my surgeon will operate at requires my bmi to be lower (in other words i'd have to lose 50 lbs)
I've been put on a crash diet of zero carbs. only meat an veggies.
yet the crash diet is also the way my surgeon suggests to eat for the rest of my life.
getting the surgery done at a different location with no bmi requirements (Tampa- 4hoursaway) will put an extra strain on family members who do not want me to get the surgery done in the first place.
after a 7 lb weight loss I was excited,still motivated and less disheartened by disagreements with family.
This weight loss, however, was after a 4 day liquid diet
I introduced food and wasn't getting enough Fiber.
my regular doctor suggested i eat these fiber Cookies and instead of looking for high fiber vegetables I started eating these wraps that had only 9g of carbs, but 6g of fiber.
My surgeon diet allotted 30g of carbs a day. But no bread, Pasta, rice, sweets, etc.
I ended up binge eating the wraps (making mini pizzas)
This happened, however, only 2 days prior to my weigh in with my surgeon.
It had been 2 weeks since i started eating solid food and I lost 0 pounds.
This infuriated me, disheartened me, made me feel like I was a failure, confused me, etc. etc.
Its been several days since that weigh in and I've gone back to the same eating habits I've always had. Probably have gained the 7 lbs I'd lost from the liquid diet or "carb withdrawal" and then some.
My anger/depression from this situation and lack of weight loss has only increased the unsupportiveness from family.
I know the surgery is only a tool that helps you in your weight loss journey and you have to put in the work.
I feel like I can, I know that I will,
but the pre-op drama is really getting to me and making me second-guess everything.
It would really help if anyone out there could share some words of wisdom.
thanks