I am having my Lapband in couple weeks. I am really feeling guilty about it. My daughter is over weight and I feel like it is my fault for the way she is. How can I convince myself that the surgery is for me and that is what i want and that I want to feel good about myself.

Future lapband patient and hope to be very successful.

Dont feel guilty. Think about it as helping yourself first so you can help your daughter next?!

I agree with PG, help yourself and learn a healthier life style and bring those things into your home. You start having healthier choices and daughter will automatically be able to shed lbs. Taking weight off is so much easier when you're younger. It was damn near impossible for this 56yo woman!

Your daughter deserves to have a healthy mother!

Sounds a bit like me. My oldest daughter is over weight too. She was happy for me and she said she was wanted to do the pre op diet with me to be supportive (so I won't feel alone). I am a huge influence on her and she watches me very close. I was banded more than 5 weeks ago and she can see my changes.

I guess what I'm saying is if your daughter watches you like mine watches me, your daughter might start picking up on your eating habits. I don't know.

Good luck

As mothers we often take the blame. The fact is we cant help others till we help ourselves. Once you begin to change your old habits and replace them with new ones your daughter can also pick up new healthier habits.

Good Luck

Wendy

We can only take care of ourselves. If you eat healthy that is best you can do for your daughter.

There is no reason you and your daughter cannot diet together.... I don't know how old she is....but surgery is a last resort... Maybe you can explain it to her that she won't need a band if she changes her eating habits now learns to live a healthy lifestyle with you.

I am my fathers twin! We look alike and act alike! My mom calls us a pair of bookends! He got the lap band done about 3 and a half years ago and he's down 180 pounds! He is just becoming more of an inspiration to me. I looked up to him as he was on his journey. Still do! And it wasn't until a year ago that I decided to get mine. And having his support only made it 10x better! Your doing a great thing! And I honor you for your braveness!!

When I started losing weight my youngest daughter gave up fast food and soda. She has given me some of her old jeans to wear. By the way I am wearing a 16 vs 22-24. You might be the inspiration your daughter needs.