My DD Roxanne is 8 and has asked several questions which I try and anwser truthfully without going into detail. BUT it’s coming to that time where I’ll need to be specific.

With all the smart people I’ve come to read and get to know here, any suggestions on books or approach would be appreciated. When the time comes I want to as ready for her, my mom wasn’t for me and I pretty much learned stuff from school…

I’ve also notice her starting to develop in the last year and can’t believe it’s happening so young. In my research I’ve heard of girls that are progressing younger and starting their cycles at even 9 years old due to the hormones in most of our foods. I have changed to organic foods as much as possible hoping to slow the growth as well as a better diet.

http://pediatrics.about.com/cs/puberty/tp/puberty_books.htm this may help.....

Vera - my two cents....my mom was always just flat honest with me. Her thought was that if I was smart enough to ask, she would give me credit by answering honestly. I know it's tough and somewhat embarassing, but....in the end, I've always been grateful that my mom was so honest about all that stuff.

If you feel weird about it then she'll only end up feeling weird about it and that's what we want to avoid, eh?

By the by, much love and luck and blessings to you....being a parent sure isn't easy!!! I have nothing but respect for parents!!!!

Aways be honest, even if you have to use clever wording.

Its all about what she has been exposed to, drawing from your belief system, and how to chose your words carefully... not giving too much, and yet, giving enough!

Seems like Dr James Dobson would have something.

Check with your local Christian Book store.

Let me know what you find... Im right there with you!

My DD is 8 1/2...last year she was complaining of pain in her pelvic area, so much so that we took her to the doctor, who had her do a sonogram..they detected ovary growth at that time, and told us she would be early into puberty. She has not had a period, but she does have breast development, and has had to start using deoderant, so I suppose we're not far off from periods, either.

I have taken the honest approach...I try to be very up front and as detailed as she wants to get...which isn't very detailed at this time, but she does have questions. My goal is for her to understand how her body works, objectively, and then to give her strong guidance in how to respect that womanly body. I filled in too many "blanks" on my own, made mistakes, and wasn't really taught how to esteem my body and give it worth. I want that for her, and it's up to me and Dh to do it.

I don't have book suggestions, but I know there are some good ones out there, maybe go to Amazon and search?

DD is big girl, is yours? She is almost 5', weighs 155, wears a size 8 women's shoe...my DH is 6'4".

Have you had to buy bras yet? I have DD wearing sport bras for the time being, it's hard to find "training bras" for a 40A! LOL!

We'll get through this, but like you, I can hardly believe it's happening so young!

Hope any of this is helpful, Cindy

Why not ask her what she already knows n' take it from there?

Read this and see if it helps. : http://parentcenter.babycenter.com/refcap/bigkid/graisinggreatkids/67908.html

~Mandy

Hey Vera...

I know my Mom was very open and direct when I started asking questions and I've taken the same approach with my daughter. I have never had to actually approach her with information... I just wait and answer the questions she brings to me. Most of the time she just says... EWWWWWWW... why would two people want to do that!!!???!!!??? Her next question was... "How do people do that with their clothes on?" Needless to say.... she thought it was down right disgusting that anyone would want to be naked with a boy. I hope she maintains this viewpoint well into her 30's.

I actually feel pretty lucky that she is 13 and still isn't showing the obvious signs of puberty other than a pimple here and there. It certainly is due to eating organic foods around here though... lol... unless raviolies are organic. J/K

Good Luck!

Well, I had a boy, it was a little different for us.

Of course, one day after 5th grade health class, Spudboy came home and announced very matter-of-factly that he would soon be going through puberty.

Want an idea? Go to Amazon and look up "menstruation". Several books come up for first timers including discussion guides for parents. We are very lucky to be raising daughters in a time when the the subject of our bodies is no longer strictly taboo. Lucky for me, I still have 6+ years to go. When I first started my period we (my mother and I) had a "Woman's Day". We went out for a nice lunch and to a movie. Consider a spa day...

Even though I thought I always wanted boys, I am very glad to have a girl. Just think of all the money I am saving on hospital bills...(silly, reckless, boys!)

The book my mother gave me, "What's Happening to my Body, Book for Girls." She went with me and we picked it out together at the bookstore. She told me to read it and if I had questions I could come to her. I answered all the questions I had, I learned the rest later! I don't envy you, I would have no idea how to answer those questions. 8 is soo young to me, but these days it really isn't when 12 year old girls are having babies.

my mother threw a book at me. Which was better than my younger sister. She just threw a box of pads at her and told her she would need them. (no explanation given.)

My mom tried to talk to me about it when I was younger, but I was embarrassed and I didn't want to listen. So she bought me a book. I can't remember the title but it was a story about a girl who got her period and what she did about it, in detail. I remember it was a nice story and I learned what I needed to know from it, and after reading the book I wasn't so worried about talking to my mom about it. Good luck.

I got an idea.... how about a gift certificate to www.slumberpartiesbylisab.com ???? I know I know, bad of me, but I just couldn't resist.

I have an 11 year old and 17 year old. Am I tired!!! O.K. Do what is best for your family.....let your gut lead you. In my opinion, honest and open is the best policy. There is no avoiding sex topics nowadays. The children get their sex education, one way or another (via media, peers, etc).

Keep it age appropriate and light. Let her ask questions and leave the topic open for future discussions. Good luck. Shawn

Great responses gals! I knew Id get some good info here.

Jenna, you busted me up. Slumber stuff is for me. But I did look into getting a book, not so much for Rox but for me. I’m a detail freak and have to get my facts right. I don’t think I’ll be sharing books with her just yet, unless I get good graphics?

Aways be honest, even if you have to use clever wording.

I'm tring Paula, I did read before you edited? And timing is everything for instance, about 2 years ago Rox and I were wishing on a chicken wish bone and I won. She asked what I wished for but I told her I can’t tell you or my wish won’t come true but I said a long time ago I wished for you and my wish came true. Her reply “ya daddy planted the seed, did you swallow it?” well I thought for a moment and said yes. Because if I would have said no I’d have to explain, and I didn’t think she was quite ready.

We do talk and a few things have happen that are interesting. She was watching Spiderman when the 2 on the movie kissed she said to me I feel tingles in my bottom. I said that’s kind of what love feels like…

One time I directed her to take a shower, when she undressed I noticed little stickers on her nipples; I chuckled and asked what were they doing there? She was very apologetic but I was more interested in where, why, who, did she get this idea from, she claimed nowhere.

I don’t what to seem like anything is wrong or even bad, just aware.

DD is big girl, is yours? She is almost 5', weighs 155, wears a size 8 women's shoe...my DH is 6'4".

Have you had to buy bras yet? I have DD wearing sport bras for the time being, it's hard to find "training bras" for a 40A! LOL!

We'll get through this, but like you, I can hardly believe it's happening so young!

Cindy sorry to hear about her painful pelvic area, I hope she's alright.

Rox is about 77 lbs. and a training bra might be in the near future, I like the sports bra idea.

my mother threw a book at me. Which was better than my younger sister. She just threw a box of pads at her and told her she would need them. (no explanation given.)

Bummer learning about life Vines; I felt a bit the same way. I knew from school that a girl gets her period but it didn’t sink in. Then one day my sister and I were at the park and I needed to go to the restroom. Well I was in shock I came out of the bathroom and told my sister that there was blood coming out of me and she laughed and laughed then practically told the world I got my period.

Most of the time she just says... EWWWWWWW... why would two people want to do that!!!???!!!???

Darcy, I can remember my niece screaming EEEWWW when her mom was telling her were it go’s many years ago... and now shes 5 monthes pregnant. I like the animal approach especially giving birth.

Thanks for the book ideas.

Rox and I spend alot of time together, I think she'll take it well