I made a comment last night about newbies feeling excluded here in such a tight knit group. I got a nice private message today from someone who told me she felt bad I felt that way, and that I just needed to yell louder to be heard.

It's hard to be accepted into a group of people who have become internet buddies, and yet the newbies really need your help. Most of you have experienced the things we are going to go through or are going through, and that is why we come here.

Last night someone posted a picture of a lovely woman by the name of Blossom who had died. I have to admit it scared me because I didn't know her or if she had died during lap-banding surgery. Someone was kind enough to fill me in and I appreciate that, but it is things like that that make newbies feel strange. We didn't know her, and just a few words to relieve our minds how you lost her would have been appreciated rather than just a picture. I have to admit it scared the be jesus out of me thinking something had gone horribly wrong in surgery.

Please take a moment when you post to realize a newbie has no clue what you are talking about when you discuss someone or something we have no knowledge of. Take a minute please and remember when you were new and before you became solid internet buddies and allow us some room to move into your hearts and get some good advice from you too.

Thanks for the opportunity to speak my mind. We come here hoping for support on our new journey, or help coping with problems that arrise, and you can all be a great inspiration to us all. I enjoy each and every thread but sometimes become lost in the talk that goes on because I don't know the people or what you are referring to.

Needless to say the special person that made me feel welcome was one who has had many problems of her own and whose posts I enjoy thoroughly. Thanks DeCarla for taking time out to write to me. You are an inspiration to everyone on this forum.

I'm happy to hear that you're feeling better about being a newbie. :scared: I'm still relatively a newbie as well. I joined 2 months prior to you.

Thanks, Dody! Things get slow on the weekends, but I promise lots of people will jump in soon. Did you ever start a thread in the Introduction forum? If not, why not tell us a little about yourself, like where you live, surgeon, kids? Sometimes those things will get the ball rolling. :scared:

Dody, you got super advice, and I hear ya, loud and clear! You have spoken well, and above the din, and made yourself heard with a very well-written post, and I promise to do a better job, and I promise when you show up somewhere, I WILL know who you are. :scared: I'm really sorry the Blossom picture with no info bothered you. I understand totally. I did post the link to her thread and hope that was helpful. Hang on for dear life. The LBT ride can be long and hard some days, but it's worth it. And if I haven't said it yet, welcome to LBT!

I appreciate the feedback. I did post an intro under the Tennessee thread, but perhaps it got overlooked. I'm not going to be banded till late April as I'm battling an ulcer right now. I will be with family when I have my surgery and my youngest daughter is a nurse. I have 5 children and am 64 years old. A little old to be a newbie huh? This is something I have to do for myself though to add years to my life. Can you be new and old at the same time? :scared:

Hi Dody! Nice to meet you! Welcome!

Welcome Dody!

Welcome, Dody~

I'm pretty new here, too...just banded a month ago. This is a great group of people...but I have to admit I had the same question about Blossom. I was glad someone posted the link to refer back to. She looked and sounded like a wonderful person that I would have enjoyed "meeting".

Emily

Ah, you posted under the TN forum. That would explain some things. Personally, I only visit the Idaho and Washington threads, since I figure I might find something local to me.

So sorry you were freaked out, I can see how that would have been a bit of a shocker. But Blossom is the only bandster I can think of who's died, and she died in an accident when her tractor rolled. I know that many boards have memorial pages or even entire forums dedicated to memorials for members who've passed on. The most we have at LBT is several beloved pets that have passed on.

I think the only way to get noticed is to scream and shout. Thanks for shouting Dody. We cannot know what people need unless they tell us. I don't ever expect my husband to be a mind reader, no "if you loved me you would know what was wrong" BS games. Thank you for telling us what you needed and what you need.

Hi Dody and welcome!!

Stay put it gets exciting around here.

Hi Dody!

I'm pretty new too. I know you're a ways out from banding, but what's really helped me was the "Feb bandster" thread over on the support board. We were all new to the band together. I find that when I see "my buds" posting elsewhere I feel a connection to them.

Perhaps you could get in on the "Non-banded folks unite" thread & find some to hang & chat with. Then when you do get banded, folks around that time will be a natural connection for you as well.

Yeah, I still feel lost... I'd love to be in the "early in" crowd, lol, but I can't move time back so I can start with them. I'm trusting that in time I'll know all the personalities behind the posts & be able to feel like friends with them too!

Anyway, all that to say, "Welcome!" And thanks for yelling!

Hey new gals, another reason people don't see you is because there are so many new posts every day. If you want to keep your thread "live" so others can see it, we do something called, "Bumping a thread." All that means is you have to type a response to put your post back at the top of the list, otherwise other threads will show up on top. So I'm bumping this since LBT is busier during the week. Soon you won't be able to keep up with all the friends you meet here!

And just so there's no confusion, Blossom's passing had nothing at all to do with the band.

Hi Dody! Welcome! This is a great bunch of people. Very supportive and well meaning. Hope to get to know you! :welcomeB:

I know that many boards have memorial pages or even entire forums dedicated to memorials for members who've passed on. The most we have at LBT is several beloved pets that have passed on.

Yeah.... I happened (as a newbie also) to stumble on one of those pages and it was quite scary because this place had a whole lot of people who had passed on. And it was like a blog so you could read all their post, their hopes and dreams, read their excitment about being approved for surgery etc. And the last entry would be something from their spouse or the moderator that said they passed.

I feel better knowing that all of the ones on the board I read were full by-pass so I know that's much more complicated. But it was still so sad and so scary. Some passed a year or so after surgery.