How do you decide on a goal weight? My doctors office has my goal as a normal BMI but i think that with my body type, that would make me too small. What do you do?

If my doctor set a goal weight for me, I have no idea what it is. I'm not sure if a "normal BMI" would be appropriate for me either. The BMI is not accurate for athletes, people who've been obese for a long period of time (our bones are heavier and skew the numbers) or for post-menopausal women. I fit 2 of those 3 categories... and working on the 3rd.

I never really set a hard & fast goal, I sorta set a number that sounded attainable. Each time I get close to that number, I back it down by 5 or 10 lbs. So far that has worked for me. For example, for a while my goal was 175. When I got to 182.. I decided to set my goal at 170...etc.

Hope this helps.

Funny I had planned to post this same question tonight. My weight based only on height should be 135lbs. At 53 I'm not pushing for that one. My doc really didn't set one for me. I went with 170, just because I thought I could reach it and keep it. I am annoyed that by the "standard" I would still be overweight. I plan a fill on Fri, because I haven't gotten there yet. I now think that I would really like to be 160 by Christmas but I haven't committed to it yet.

If you are like me you will set more than one goal. There was no official goal set by my doc but I was asked by my psych what my goal was and I said 150. When you have been overweight your whole life like I was, it is hard to imagine going all the way with weightloss and actually I was afraid to set the bar too high and fail. I chose 150 because in my many attempts to lose weight, I did once reach 170 for a brief time and figured with the LapBand I could probably top that by 20 pounds. I couldn't imagine myself ever being any smaller. She told me that I could do better and I should aim high which I now think is good advice. At the time I looked at her stick-thin frame and thought..."yeah , that's easy for you to say." Although I didn't think I could or even needed to, to satisfy her I set my goal at middle-normal BMI which is 137 then didn't give it much more thought...If I hit 150 I was going to be very happy with that.

While losing weight I set mini-goals...hit one-derland, lose half my excess weight, lose X pounds by this date. Then before I knew it I hit 150 and happily settled in there for a good while. After months at 150 I gained a couple pounds and decided to go in for a maintenance fill. That got my weightloss moving again and before too long I found myself at 137 and though in the beginning I would have never imagined that or expected it, I have to say my 5'3" frame looks pretty good at that size! I am now comfortably settled in at around 130-135, meaning I don't have to obsess about every calorie that crosses my lips and as long as I am mindful of what I am eating and keep active I am easily staying within this range.

Having big bones is a fallacy. There is very little difference in size between most people's bones.It depends more on your height etc. A normal BMI should be everyones goal. Why would you go through this to settle for still being overweight. There is still a lot of scope within a normal BMI for various " body types". At the top end of normal you won't be skinny.

I don't understand why someone would go through all this not to at least try and get to a normal BMI.

I too chose 150 when my Dr asked me how much I wanted to weigh. Of course I dont believe I have been 150 since I was 15-16 years old but I did get to 170 for a minute in the 90s and I figured I could go past that by 20 lbs.

I was 377lbs with a BMI of 55 at my heaviest last October when I picked that random number. I am a big girl. I wear a size 10w shoe and 9-10 ring as I have big hands compared to most woman I know and basically feel like I am always the largest girl in the room. I used to be 5'10". Now I seem to be 5'9". Not sure what happend or maybe my driver's license lied to me for 35 years.... or maybe I am losing fat off my feet. ( and no... I refuse to attribute it to aging... LOL)

I have read every chart on the internet and it seems I will be @ a healthy weight for my frame between 140-160. Of course I will still be tall so all thoughts of being a petite little thing just arent happening. But I am hoping to have a CIndy Crawford or Christy Brinkley in their 40s-50s type of shape.... Not small by any means... just healthy looking.

Having big bones is a fallacy. There is very little difference in size between most people's bones.It depends more on your height etc. A normal BMI should be everyones goal. Why would you go through this to settle for still being overweight. There is still a lot of scope within a normal BMI for various " body types". At the top end of normal you won't be skinny.

I don't understand why someone would go through all this not to at least try and get to a normal BMI.

The BMI charts do not account for muscle mass. That is why it is inaccurate for atheletes. I think having a low Fat percentage is more accurate and healthier.

I'm a perfectionist and a chronic high achiever so I picked a fairly ambitious goal weight - I wanted to be THIN. I got there and passed it, with no real drama. But being the perfectionist I am, I'm still not 100% happy - I could be thinner, I could look better, I should do more this, that, etc etc.

I too chose 150 when my Dr asked me how much I wanted to weigh. Of course I dont believe I have been 150 since I was 15-16 years old but I did get to 170 for a minute in the 90s and I figured I could go past that by 20 lbs.

I was 377lbs with a BMI of 55 at my heaviest last October when I picked that random number. I am a big girl. I wear a size 10w shoe and 9-10 ring as I have big hands compared to most woman I know and basically feel like I am always the largest girl in the room. I used to be 5'10". Now I seem to be 5'9". Not sure what happend or maybe my driver's license lied to me for 35 years.... or maybe I am losing fat off my feet. ( and no... I refuse to attribute it to aging... LOL)

I have read every chart on the internet and it seems I will be @ a healthy weight for my frame between 140-160. Of course I will still be tall so all thoughts of being a petite little thing just arent happening. But I am hoping to have a CIndy Crawford or Christy Brinkley in their 40s-50s type of shape.... Not small by any means... just healthy looking.

I'm 5ft 10 and by 245lb had appeared to have shrunk to 5ft 9, then a year or two later after banding, I was 5ft 10 again. The nurse at the lapband clinic told me that its simnply the fact that your bum gets so big that when you go to get measured, it forces you to lean backwards slightly to get your head against the wall for the tape, which appears to reduce your height!

To pick my goal, I did exactly what you've done, I know what being about 170 was like, I held that weight throughout my teens and 20's. It was OK, healthy enough but I felt "big" and unfeminine all the time, I was so much bigger than most other women. I knew I wanted to be much thinner, so I whacked off 20lb as well. I actually got down to 130ish for a whikel there while I was sick and I was skeletal up top, I am struggling with having gotten back to 140 but everyone says I look no different, just overall healthier. I know all my clothes still fit apart from one pair of jeans.

I also always would have said I was "big boned" but funnily enough, I"m really not, althought I too have size 10 feet and relatively large hands. I lost SO much weight off my fingers, I got a new diamond ring - my wedding and engagement ring could not be adjusted enough without resetting the entire thing, and I fanced I much bigger diamond :-). I "only" had a BMI of 35 and yet my hands became unrecognizeable to me, and I would never have said they were "fat".

Most of us think we're big boned, meant to be bigger etc, and if we give ourselves a chance, its amazing to find out wer'e totally normal sized people underneath. I feel great at 140! I'm sure you will too. But sadly, Cindy Crawford I"m not, lol.

I always dreamed of being petite. Being so tall, you're always going to be bigger than a lot of women. But you know what, if I go with it, actually put on some heels and a short skirt (which I dont often do because heels make me like 6ft 2 and rather self conscious), DH reckons every head in the room turns. He says I'm Amazonian and that my legs go all the way to my armpits and that its very striking. So if you cant blend in with all the cute little things, outshine them!

Now, I have 3 new hot pairs of sky high heels that DH bought me and I just have to get up the courage to wear them. I find it easier to wear a bikini than to go out in high heels! Oh - and find some more jeans that are long enough to wear with heels! Sadly, True Religions at $400 a pair are the only jeans available here long enough for me.

I started this journey at 149 kg (328lb) and am now at 118kg (260). My first goal has always to be 99 kg (218) - get below that 100 mark. I have a new gold watch picked out as my reward. I am hoping that once I get there I will reassess my goals and pick another one but at the moment my head is wondering if I have reached my limit. I think this is because I have been able to get down to 120kg in the past before stacking it back on. I have to keep working and let my body prove to my head that it's not done yet!

Having big bones is a fallacy. There is very little difference in size between most people's bones.It depends more on your height etc. A normal BMI should be everyones goal. Why would you go through this to settle for still being overweight. There is still a lot of scope within a normal BMI for various " body types". At the top end of normal you won't be skinny.

I don't understand why someone would go through all this not to at least try and get to a normal BMI.

Because a normal BMI is a fallacy for Athletes, those who've been obese for a long period of time and post-menopausal females.

My PCP does not want me to try to attain what the BMI charts say is normal for me. He thinks I would be risking hip fx's if I had so little padding on my hips and fell.

The "big bones" theory isn't total malarky. Those who've been obese for an extended period of time do tend to have larger bones (generally the weight bearing bones..legs, hips, etc) due to the stress put on them by weight and that does skew the BMI charts a bit.

Fat %, while harder to measure, is a better goal. I'm also striving for a healthy waist measurement (1/2 of my height) and a good waist/hip ratio.

If a normal BMI is what you want to attain.. go for it. It's not my goal.

my healthy BMI is 25 , now that means I will weigh 150 , I am 5'5 , so can you picture a guy who weighs that much , you could see my heart beat , my starting weight was 263 , my happy weight is 200 , and my goal weight is 180 , right now I weigh 200.4 , yeah what a tease , but I really can't see myself weighing 150 , I ask skinny guys at work who are the same height and they weigh , between 170 to 180 , so I set my goal at 180 , I will still be fat by the chart , but I have learn that chart is not so great , for everyone

screw the chart... im sorry, but i am not going to go from a 299 porker to a 135 stick. That is not ideal for me. I am one who does not physically mind being big (being Puerto Rican and having a lot of the weight in my lower portion), but i'm getting the lapband because this weight has begun to take a toll on my health. I have seen people who lose too much weight and look unhealthy.. almost sickly. My goal is 170. I know what i look like and feel like at that weight. It's good to make these goals, but to also keep in mind that you can MODIFY them! Good luck to everyone!

I'm 5'2", my goal right now is a normal BMI, albeit the high end. So it is 135 right now. As I get closer that may be higher or lower, not sure. I don't like the look of people who are extremely thin. Ive been fat for a long time, so I have no idea what I will look like at that weight. Only time will tell.

It never ceases to amaze me how people who have been obese just simply cannot accept that a normal BMI is not horribly skinny. Its absolutely epidemic on this forum.

I mean, people should weigh what ever the hell they want, nobody can tell you that you MUST get to a normal BMI and if you fancy a bit of padding and like a plumper look then you should go for that and bugger what anyone says about it not being healthy or it still being overweight.

But to say that you'd have so little padding on your hips at a BMI of 25 that you'd risk fractures, sorry but that IS malarky. Its healthier for older women to weight a little more, you need the fat on your body to maintain strong bones, that's entirely true. But a BMI of 25 is still quite a bit of body fat, its not that skinny look that people seem so afraid of - I didnt hit truly skinny until my BMI dropped under 20 whilst I was sick. Different body types and all that, but at a BMI of 25m, I personally have tummy rolls and a muffin top - its FAR from skinny.

Unfortunately on real life non airbrushed bodies - voluptuous breasts and rounded hips go along with fat bottoms, cellulite and flabby tummies. Flat tummies and hips that rock low rise jeans go along with no boobs and gaunter faces. Do you have the hips and breasts that are so attractive and rock your muffin top in those low rise jeans or would you rather be a fashion plate, more so than the kind of look most men probably find attractive?

The guy thing too - I mean I know no guy wants to be skinny. But you cant get that fantasy body by simply remaining overweight, that weight has to be muscle! You almost have to get skinny - lose all the fat and then put on another 20lb in muscle again. If you care about that stuff. Personally, I like a man with a little padding on him and I reckon save all the agony at the gym, stay a bit heavier and be nice and cuddly!

And I know we're not dissing each other and our weights but I personally take offence when people continually refer to normal BMI as skinny, stick like, anorexic. I'm 135 at 5ft 10 and I dont like beign called a stick! We all have different ideas of what the ideal body is, and I personally like long, lean and elegant. But I dont go around calling people that like to be curvier fat.

I think we need to be realistic about our mental attitudes too - I mean I know I wanted to get to a low BMI not only because I like that body type, but also because I'm a control freak and a perfectionist. But I also think a lot of people are just plain afraid of failing so they say they are happy to remain heavier, when in actual fact they're afraid of really putting themselves out there and placing that expectation and then not meeting it.

I totally agree with the above poster though that you can modify the guidelines to suit YOU. I reckon like the protein first, low carb thing, if it suits you, fine but only an idiot blindly follows rules like that! How can any doctor tell you how you must eat without knowing you, your lifestyle, your circumstances? Its a ridiculous concept, And so is telling people that to be healthy they must weight between this weight and that. But it goes both ways! Its just as valid to choose to be leaner.

This was only a question over how to pick a goal weight, lol. But its an extremely complex issues as you can see. It has to take into account, your body type, but also your mental attitude and issues and what you can live with to maintain it. Its your goal and yours alone!

I know what I look like at the highest end of the 'normal' scale on the BMI charts and it is way too skinny. Those charts are not really all that accurate for a lot of people. At 6' 3" and 205 lbs in high school, I looked stupid skinny. 230 lbs is perfect for my bones and the BMI chart is way off in my case.