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Connie, you need to do what is best for you! My husband was soooo unsupportative, he did not even visit me in hospital, not even a damn phone call, im still pissed about it..... My surgery was 10/3/12.... Anyway, wishing you all the best!!!

Yup I was on the receiving end of stares that began in the waiting room as well as unkind unsolicited comments from co workers that got word I was having the surgery. For me it's no secret I'm having WLS but it isn't a community decision either. I began this WLS journey at 245lbs standing at just 5'2 so yes I FREAKING NEED THIS SURGERY TOO! Luckily for me all the extra padding for the most part fell in all the right places hips and behind or my deep dark secret would be public knowledge lol. I've had so many unpleasant conversations with unsupportive friends and family but not one of these people can feel the pain I feel daily in my knees, joints, and back. These r my swollen ankles and feet that hurt just to stand on them for long periods of time or me being winded going up a flight of stairs. Looks can be deceiving but just because a person my not be as heavy as some others doesn't mean we aren't equally as unhealthy and in desperate need of help. I honestly believe in NEVER judge anyone as we all fall short somewhere or another.

I agree with others thinking its jealousy. I too have a few friends who are very unsupportive. And everyone of them are heavy,,,sad to say but it's true!!! Sometimes with friends like that we don't need enemies!!

Thanks for sharing. I can't understand why some people are so unsupportive & quick to judge someone who is struggling. I mean, we all got WLS because we didn't know when or how to stop eating, right?? I can't stand the people who get all high and mighty. I'm only 4 months out & have started to struggle as I can tolerate more foods. Good luck getting back on track.

Hi don't give up. If you follow all steps you will be fine. Don't let the unsupportive people kick you off surgery or scare u. Put in your mind you can do this and you WILL DO THIS!! I will all the best and good luck.

I'm not a therapist, but I think that he's gone way beyond "subconscious". What the h*ll does he think he is doing???? Maybe it's time for some direct and honest questions and ANSWERS. My SO is clinically depressed, but even so that does not give him the right to be sooo unfeeling and unsupportive to the point of being cruel. We had a "lively" Q & A last night. That is the reason I didn't get back to you last night. The "air" is much clearer around here this morning I live way up here in upstate NY, but for whatever it's worth--you have MY support. Please, keep in touch. I care. Valentina ....

Hey folks-- I finally will have a surgery date by the end of the week for sometime in April. Here is my honest to God, unbias opinion of the Doctors and Specialists I have seen. First up, Bariatric Surgeon #1.... Dr. Moran. http://www.alasurgery.com/ The Short: $250 "administrative fee." Unsupportive Staff. Reputable and experienced Surgeon. Bad Bed side manner. Very much to the point. The Long: His office staff was rude, unhelpful, and unsupportive to my needs. They gave me a hassle about faxing my documentating to another doctor when I decided to change. I was denied by insurance because my BMI was > 50. They knew this on the first visit/consultation. Dr. Moran told me all he would have to do is call the insurance company and the denial would be overturned. After I plunked down the cash, the copays, etc, I was told by his office staff that Dr. Moran was far too busy to call me or my insurance company. They referred me to a financing company to pay for my surgery, even though I am fully 100% insured. They offered no assistance in the way of the appeals. Pharrah (office manager), Iris(receptionist), and Ann(bariatric coordinator) are the office staff that I had the displeasure of dealing with. I had to call their office constantly to receive updates on my case. It seemed as if without me calling and asking constantly, nothing got done. Dr. Moran himself was alright, though a bit cold and curt. The office staff motivated me to move to a new Doctor and never look back. Tammi Moore-- Psychiatrist: She is a wonderful woman and knows all about the bariatric surgeries. I really enjoyed working with her and talking with her. I am considering seeing her again after my surgery. Dr. Earnhardt - Cardiologist: This man was probably my favorite of all the specialists I have seen. So kind, attentive, and informative. Loved this visit. Ashley Miles - Nutritionist at Rex Wellness SHe was a total sweetheart as well. It was a joy to see her. Highly recommended. Baratric Surgeon #2.... Dr. Enochs. http://www.surgerync.com/ Angelica at Dr. Enochs is my angel. She was VERY helpful over the phone far before I paid them a single dime. She is the bariatric coordinator over there. She talked me through my issues and got me in to see Dr. Enochs as soon as possible. Luckily, in between visits, I lost the weight I needed for the BMI factor, so that will no longer be an issue. Dr. Enochs himself is a sweetheart and took the time to answer all of my questions. However, there is a $500 administrative fee here. BUT, since I had already paid Dr. Moran $250 and was so frustrated by the process, Dr. Enochs only charged me $250. Yay! It was somewhat of a lengthy wait once I got to the office (30 minutes after my scheduled appointment) and his office in Cary is a bit of a haul from my home in NorthWest Raleigh, but I think it was well worth it. Dr. Enochs also has a FANTASTIC support staff who saw me and spent time with me. I met with 5 employees while there, all guiding me through their area of expertise. Highly recommended. Please PM or reply with any questions at all.

I think what you've said isn' rude, it's actually verbal and mental abuse. Your wife will never look like an 18 year old again, and either will you for that matter. Just imagine what she could say about your physique; and you haven't even bore children! 200 lbs on a 5'9" frame isn't "packing on the pounds" it's baby weight. You are so very fortunate that she didn't pack on the same pounds that you did. Have you ever considered that your wife's lethargy could be due to untreated depression. Having an unsupportive husband and just having children can make the strongest woman depressed.

You are far, far from alone. You've found a great place to hang out and bounce thoughts and ideas around with folks that have been where you are. It absolutely sucks to not have family support. That is something that is beyond your span of control. Right now it's time to rally and focus. Don't worry about things that you have no direct control over. Simply take care of the details that you can.....such as getting all your ducks in a row leading up to surgery.....following your eating plan and getting your mind wrapped firmly about the changes that you're making to claim your health. Any type of surgery has risks. I've heard the spiel each time I went under for repairs to my knees, ankle, hernia repairs and etc. Each time I woke up feeling relieved that it was over and all that was left was to heal and recover. I'm a special kind of stupid, though, in that I'm always tearing something up in some misadventure or another. Oh well......having fun has it's risks, too. Nothing is as risky as living at the weight I was last year, though. The Grim Reaper's shadow was creeping over me. Stroke, heart attack or worse was a real threat. Now......nothing could be further from my mind. The sleeve was a gift. The benefits it has delivered have been rolling in ever since. It starts with small things....scale moving in a great direction, clothes getting loose, aches and pains subsiding.......then it leads to other events.......having blood pressure go into normal range, after falling into "low" range briefly....lol at those low bp feels....never before had I experienced it. I was at Best Buy reaching down to get a CD from the lower shelf and I almost.....almost blacked out. It took a huge effort to get upright and breathing. Turns out my bp meds and the 3 week post-sleeve weight loss had joined forces bigtime. Funny stuff. I will wager this for you...........Those unsupportive folks will change their tune once they see your resolve. They will see that you aren't waiting around for a miracle, but taking steps and applying your effort and focus to make this happen. They can't help but be impressed by your dedication and work. It takes dedication and effort on your part of the sleeve to work. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. The stuff about being able to eat anything the first year and still lose lots of weight is bullcrap. It may apply to some.....but not to everyone. Eating the right foods is the crucial part for me. Sugars and starches will cause my losing to stop and weight gain to occur. I know this because I've had it happen last month. No.....losing weight takes effort on your part.....with or without wls. Once your family sees you putting forth this effort every single day.....and your weight coming off......they will most likely come around to supporting you. Don't hold your breath, though......just do your thing. Get healthy and reap the benefits of getting there. You'll find your stride and never look back. I have nothing but respect for you making this change. You are young and have a great life waiting for you. Don't sweat the pre-op diet and post-op first weeks......simply stick with the plan and work through it. It's a brief phase and you'll get on to losing very quickly if you stick with it. Go buy a full length mirror and get ready to see the progress....take lots of pictures along the way so you'll never forget what happens if you don't stay with the plan......and then look back and see how far you came and how good you feel. You've got this. Your new life is waiting......

This is precisely why I'm not telling my mom until afterwards--she's a worrier and she'll stress me out. I'm 37, but I'm still her child. I wish I had some good advice for you. I do have an unsupportive best friend and it's not nearly the same as a disapproving parent, but I am seriously concerned that my decision and her reaction/attitude might end our friendship.

Making the decision to have weight loss surgery is a very big deal. It seems obvious to say that when someone agrees to weight-loss surgery they're desperate for help to change the way they're living, or not fully living their lives. Everyone goes into the procedure ready and willing to surgically alter their anatomy hoping for a better future. So why is it that so many will fall short of losing the optimal amount of weight for their health and will actually regain within 3 years much if not all of the weight they lost? Some studies say 1/3 of patients will regain most of their weight post-surgery. I think the number is actually higher because many people who regain simply fall out of contact with their bariatric surgeon and support staff because they feel ashamed, so the statistics do not include these people. So, why do most people regain the weight? What can you do to help insure that you will be one of the successful long-term losers of your excess weight? By examining why people fail you can create a plan for how you will succeed. The government agency, National Institutes for Health (NIH) defines weight-loss surgery as "merely a tool that helps people get a new start toward maintaining long-term good health. The surgery alone will not help someone lose weight and keep it off. Together with a reduced-calorie and low-fat diet and daily exercise, surgery will help an individual lose weight and maintain the weight loss.” Please read that a few times. That is how important this quote is! The surgery alone will not help someone lose weight and keep it off. We as weight-loss surgery patients have a history of seeking comfort, happiness and pleasure through food. We wouldn't be here if that weren't true. Me included. The process of surgically altering our anatomies does nothing to remove from us the tendency to seek comfort in familiar ways but assures there will be physical suffering if we do. Post-surgery we will still have the same brain that is used to comforting us with food, and we will still have the fingers and the arms that are used to lifting food to the same mouth to find comfort and pleasure. It is critically important that the WLS patient seek out new ways to soothe, comfort, and find pleasure in their world other than by eating. ONE main reason patients regain their weight is they search for ways to get around the surgery, still thinking of food as primarily a source of pleasure, not a source of fuel that can be pleasurable. This is often done relying on liquid calories, which may pass more easily, like high calorie coffee or juice bar drinks or alcohol. This is also done post-operatively by trying to maintain the presence of “trigger foods” in their lives. “Trigger foods” are often foods from the patient's past that helped cause obesity, do not satisfy hunger but instead create a craving. Many are high-calorie and highly processed, not nutritious. Trigger foods can include chocolate, chips, crackers, bread, cookies, ice cream, pudding, lattes, frapuccinos and alcoholic beverages. Really, any food can be a “trigger food” if there is so much pleasure in the “mouth-feel” or taste that repeating the pleasurable experience takes on more importance than actually feeding hunger. Very successful patients cultivate a mostly trigger-free post- surgical life. Bariatric surgeons and the NIH know the most common reason for regain and the most common post- surgical complication is “noncompliance.” Non-compliance is a fancy word that means the patient is not eating and exercising the way he/she agreed to before surgery. These people “talk the talk.” The successful patient “walks the walk” after surgery and changes how they eat and move. A SECOND reason people often regain beginning in the second or third year post-op is that the “honeymoon” is over. The “honeymoon” generally encompasses the first 12 to 18 months post- surgery. During this time many patients will say, "I could eat all the chocolate and ice cream I wanted and still lose weight. I didn't have to try and the weight just came off.” This is often true because the body has been through such a shock after surgery that it takes months for the body to reset itself and learn to function with its' new physiology. Patients who regain their weight often believe that this “honeymoon period” is the new way that it will always be and don't adopt healthy eating patterns. So when their “honeymoon period” ends as it will they believe that the surgery has somehow failed them. In reality they have failed their surgery! During the first 12-18 months post-op it is essential to develop healthy patterns around food and exercise. This is the time when it is actually easiest to do and to not do so wastes a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to begin a great new life with positive momentum. A THIRD reason many patients regain much of their lost weight is a lack of support. Humans are social animals and we desire and need the support of each other throughout our lives. For thousands, if not tens of thousands, of years people coming together as a family or a community over food has been a way we connect with each other. Post-surgery, when the patient isn't able to eat what others are eating or in the quantities others are eating, or others are eating their 'trigger foods”, life can feel very stressful and lonely. This can be compounded by being around unsupportive people or people who want to be supportive but don't know how. Patients fail by not surrounding themselves with supportive people in a safe environment where they also must be accountable for their actions and behavior with food and their bodies. It is key to have a community of professionals and non-professionals who understand the challenges and hardships faced by those carving a new life with a new anatomical structure. There are online and in-person support groups. Even patients who've gone abroad for weight loss surgery can often use the support services available with their local medical group's Bariatric department. Creating relationships that support and assist you in becoming a healthier person and that hold you accountable for making healthy choices are key. These are my top three. What would you add to this list? What plan will you create to deal with the items you add to this list? Who will support you on this journey of your life.....for your life?

So personally I don't think you are asking too much at all. When my mom and I went on a liquid diet to lose weight, it was hard because we were trying to make this HUGE lifestyle change while the other half of our family carried on as though it wasn't a big deal. Which, looking back, hindered the progress we made. Because if your family is not supporting you by still going to fast food restaurants while you are there and not empathizing with you and your struggle, what's to stop you from easing into old habits. That's not to say tell them to stop altogether, at least not at this point, but asking them to be more considerate and maybe let you know if they are going to a fast food place so you can opt out. I've also been on the side where I wasn't dieting and my some in my family were. I made the accommodations because I loved them and wanted to support them on this journey to be the most successful they could be. If it meant not eating taco bell in front of them I gladly did it, because I stood by my support of them. I think you should have a talk with her and just explain how you need to be supported to have the best possible success because maybe she doesn't see her actions as unsupportive. Also if the whole family is trying to eat healthier why is is she going to a fast food joint anyway. I think you guys should probably sit down and have the talk again so as to clear the air and pave the way for a healthier life.

i think the whole purpose of this post--initially--was either mistaken or communicated poorly (most likely by my own fault). i am young. i'm also someone who has been fat ALL HER LIFE! i've worn my weight problems on me for the world to see for as long as i can remember. initially, i was confused as to why someone would have to hide the fact that they are having surgery from someone as close to them as their father. it was my lack of life experience with an unsupportive family that lead to this confusion, but after the first couple of posts explaning to me that not everyone has great relationships with their family like i do, i made a pretty clear mea culpa and even commended those people with unsupportive family members for going through something like this so alone. now, the fact that this whole thing spun was when i felt that luluc (i think that's her name) said that not admitting that the band helped her to lose her weight bothered me. again, yes, this may have been said irrationally and without adequate experience being banded. my doctor gave me permission to integrate food back into my diet, and i'm feeling no restriction (i haven't been filled yet), and i want to keep eating--i do--but i CHOOSE to stop eating and not go over 800-1000 calories a day. i'm hoping that once i'm filled i will not have to force myself to stop--that i will actually start feeling full and feel satisfied. okay. all that said, i guess i am apologizing for things being taken so far out of hand and out of context. i was a bit snarky, but i do not feel that i was the only one. two wrongs, however, don't make a right. just as my parting words from this post. i was in no way trying to scare people out of getting a lap band. all i'm saying is that if a obese person in my life (colleague, old friend, family member i haven't seen in a while/am not close to, someone from the gym, etc) sees my success and asks me how i do it...i will tell them that i had a lap band surgery, and i really had to evaluate what i eat and how much of it i eat, and it changed my life forever. the only reason i would tell them that is because they may chose to consider getting the lap band too, and it might save their life...that's how i came to get one. i ran into two people from my past when i moved back to my hometown after eight years--they'd both lost tons of weight and looked great, and they'd both had the band. they didn't tell me "maybe if you order fish/sushi to eat and get your a$$ to the gym, you'll lose weight too." good luck to all!

I had surgery with a weight of 240 after the diet. My rny was fine at first but I started having complications. To this day we aren't sure what caused them, but after four months in and out of the hospital I had my surgery reversed and had gastric sleeve instead. It's very rare to do this but this was my surgeons suggestion. My first surgeon was a total jerk and was very unsupportive. It was a tough experience and very scary. I had two pic lines and went days without eating or drinking. After my sleeve surgery, my major complications stopped, but I have never been able to transition to solids. My sleeve surgery was March 2015 and I've never had a full meal. I found a new surgeon who has diagnosed me with a stricture and scar tissue in the spot they reconnected my pouch from the rny with the new sleeve stomach. He has done one dilation on me but it did not help. He wants to continue the dilations. The ironic thing is that he says if the dilations don't work, I may have to go back to rny. So I'm 123 pounds at 5'6 and still losing about two pounds per week. I can't seem to settle on a weight loss goal and I'm terrified of entering maintainence. On the positive side, because this post is not in any way intended to be negative towards this surgery- I have never looked or felt better. I feel amazing in my new body. I love the way I look now. I Celebrate this body by dressing up and buying clothes and enjoying a dating life and a social life I would never have had otherwise. My confidence is through the roof. My back pain is gone and I have more energy for my kids and life in general. This surgery have my my life back and released me from the chain of a food addiction. I would do it again in a second!!!! Again and again. Because guess what? Nothing tastes as good as thin feels. Period. I hope my story helps you in your journey. I highly recommend this surgery, it is a wonderful tool that can give you the leverage you need to lose weight and the truth is the vast majority of people do not have complications. I would do it again in spite of mine and I'm happy to answer any questions anyone has for me. Here are some photos of me. I haven't had any plastic surgery and don't plan to. Before: Most recent: The last one, me swimming with my kids, is something I could never have done without this surgery.

My mom has been unsupportive as well. She keeps telling me I should be able to do this on my own and I'm just being lazy. On top of that, she started dieting after having her aortic valve replaced and will call me to brag on the weight she has lost "naturally". I'm 40 years old and don't need this crap. My dad is much better about it but he did sit me down at Christmas and tell me he thought I was being selfish because what would happen to my 3 young kids if I died from complications? Talk about a guilt trip! He's since come around but it's hard to deal with all the negative feedback you get. I've only told 3 friends, my parents, and my husband's parents. I know it's hard to do something your parents don't approve of (even though we're adults!) but ultimately, it's your life and your health and you need to do what is best for YOU. Good luck and I hope it gets easier!

This article/post couldn't have come at a better time - I've been procrastinating about getting the required letter from my PCP. I actually have NO idea whatsoever what she thinks of WLS; I just fear she'll have the negative reactions a lot of people have. She has told me to lose weight several times. I am fortunate in that I am a patient in the University of Pennsylvania health system, so I know there are many other options to go to if she turns out to be unsupportive...but knowing that intellectually isn't the same as the emotional fears that pop up.

Hi all, I’m new to this community and this my first post. I have a tentative VSG date of April 12, 2021. Currently awaiting approval from insurance. Here is my problem: I am a single 40 year-old woman who lives alone with her dog. My parents who are in their early 70s and healthy have agreed to come help out 1-2 weeks post surgery. As the surgery date gets closer, my parents, specifically my mother are starting to become less and less supportive. She’s unsure if they will be able to help post-op, she thinks I should wait until summer, she’s worried about post-surgical pain, she thinks I should board the dog so they don’t have to take care of her, etc. I’ve officially been meeting with doctors and checking things off since October of 2020. I’ve been open and planning with my family for this for years. I’m frustrated with the lack of support from my parents and don’t want to wait until summer for surgery. I am able to take time off of work, and work from home when I get surgery in April. I have been hesitant to share this news or even my surgery plans even with my close friends. It’s too personal and too painful and I don’t really want to depend on them for help. I don’t have a partner or any siblings close enough to help out. Has anyone struggled with a similar issue? How terrible and painful and unmanageable is the first two weeks after surgery? I don’t want to do it alone, but I’m afraid my parents are not in a good space to move in for 1-2 weeks nd help me directly after. In fact, they seem downright unsupportive at times. Any advice, recommendations, or experiences are welcome. Thanks in advance.

I'm really frustrated with my best friend and I'm not sure what I'm gonna do about it so I came here to rant into the abyss. She said some hurtful things that I'm having a hard time letting go of. Every time we speak she comments about needing to get on track with her diet so that I don't pass her up. It sucks! I didn't realize that my role in our friendship was being the fat one and I guess it's important to her that it stay that way. She is also overweight but has never been morbidly obese. My current weight is probably about where her highest weight has been but she is less right now. Every time we speak she asks me how I'm doing with my weight loss and asks a lot of detailed questions most of which I'm happy to answer as we've been friends for 10 years. Then 2 weeks ago, she sent me a text saying that she doesn't want to talk to me right now because watching me lose weight and looking better is upsetting to her. She said it is triggering her eating disorder of which I was unaware. I responded compassionately even though I was upset and told her it was ok for her to be honest with me about her feelings. I expected to give her some time and space and see how things go but she texts me almost every day with something sad and horrible about missing her mom or depression or anxiety or her wife or her son's behavior problems and it feels like she's leaning really heavily on me. This might just be a season in our friendship were she needs more support than I do right now. But it's hard for me to hang in there when she says unsupportive things to me and then expects me to just keep responding to 2am texts. Luckily for both of us she lives in another state so she never has to see the look on my face when she makes those comments. I only told 5 people about my surgery: my mom, my 2 sisters, my husband and my best friend. She lives in another state and we probably only talk about once a month these days. I was counting on her as part of my support system. She is going through a lot, like all of us. She suffers from depression, struggles with money, has some family issues and lost her mom a year ago. I love her and I worry about her. It makes me sad that I feel like our friendship is not healthy for me.

A friend of mine her husband was unsupportive he was so use to her being overweight he felt threatened that she would find someone else after weight loss. After her surgery they were just fine though she has shown him that she doesn't want anyone else and he is happy with her results. My husband has been supportive since I first discussed getting the band with him. I'm insecure about how I look and he's looking forward to the day were I feel happy and good about myself because for song long I've hate everything about the excess weight. GL with everything wish you and your husband all the best

Hmmm, I have one friend who is remarkable unsupportive. I honestly wish I had never told her about it in the first place. I did not tell too many people, my mom, grandma, husband, and 4 very close friends. With the exception of this one riend everyone has been super about it. I think the unsuportive friend has her own issues and me being 100 pounds overwieght makes it easier for her to feel good about the 50 or so pounds she claims she needs to lose. I dont accept negativity and I look at it as her problem rather than mine. It sucks that I dont want to talk to her too much about it because it iss an exciting journey that Iwant to share with those I am close to. I have not told anyone else in my family because I know they would not understand and I dont feel like explaining and reexpailning and justifying etc over and over again.

I am sure that there are other protein powders besides Unjury that would be as good. I was able to buy it from the diet doctor's office, which is right next door to the surgeon's office. So, that was a no brainer. Does your surgeon know where you can get some? I am going to check out the Isopure the next time I need to buy protein. If you read the labels, you probably want to check how many calories you are getting with your protein. For example, the label might say 20g of protein, but does that mean two scoops of protein and up to 300 calories? Hope not! My Unjury strawberry sorbet is 20g protein and 100 calories. Muscle Milk chocolate is 16g protein and 150 calories. Unjury chicken is 21g protein and 90 calories. But, when I was at the gym today, I was checking out some of their supplements and some of them had 300 calories per serving! Those are for bodybuilders or someone else but me! Another day, I bought some protein supplement at Sam's club, and when I got it home, I realized that it had (if I recall) something like 150 calories and only 9g protein. It can really be dizzying to sort through the protein, just whatever you decide, maybe don't buy too much. You are so fortunate to have a caring husband who wants to make everything ready for you. Mine is like that too. It breaks my heart when I hear about unsupportive loved ones.

Everyone has issues like that. People are always going to be unsupportive. You need to do what is best for you. It's not about losing some weight, it's about losing weight and keeping it off. Anyone can lose some weight, but long term success is what matters. Sent from my SM-G900V using BariatricPal mobile app

So sorry to hear of the struggle with your family. This journey can be a struggle within itself, so you don't need any added pressure! The good news is, you do have some people in your corner, and you are one step closer to a healthier you! Lean on those who are supportive of you, and do what you can not to focus on those who aren't. I realize that's easier said than done, but I'm sure you are stronger than you realize. You've already made a big step and exhibited enormous courage! Each step will get easier (both mentally and physically). As hard as it my be to do, you might have to place some distance between you and the "unsupportive" individuals and focus solely on you. Sometimes people who display unsupportive behaviors do so because they want you to remain in a unhappy place. They want you there because they take pleasure in seeing you there. Hard to believe, but it happens. Wishing you continued success on your journey!

It is so sad that sometimes we don't get the support we need, but I mostly chalk it up to ignorance. I guess sometimes people are purposely unsupportive, but I truly think that when one goes through VSG the real problem is that those around you (especially women in your circle of close friends and family) have great difficulty adjusting to the idea that you are going to be different physically in relation to them. For example, my sister and a few close women friends of mine were always thinner than me until recently. While they've all been supportive of my choice, they are clearly feeling like I'm "winning" a race that I'm not even running. It's so not a competition, but I think we all have that tendency to compare ourselves. All of a sudden, everyone who is close to me is exercising and asking questions about how I eat and what I eat, as if they want my secret tips. So, maybe it's understandable when we feel a little lack of support. The key, IMO, is to remember it's their issue and not let them get inside your victory to undermine it. I get the best support right here on this forum.

In the beginning I had planned on only telling immediate family. But word got around and now my entire familyand my husbands family all know. I ended up telling people at work too. I have no regrets, there was a lot of curiosity in the beginning but once I explained it to everyone it wasn't so bad. I work with a pretty good group of people who are mature enough not to hound me or judge me. My advice would be to definitely tell your close family, they need to know that you are going to have surgery and it will be easier if they understand that you will be eating differently. If you have family, friends, co-workers that you feel would be judgemental or unsupportive, I would hold off on letting them in on it...you do not need any negativity.