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Glass is Half Full Girl

LAP-BAND Patients

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Blog Entries posted by Glass is Half Full Girl

  1. Ok, six months into this and no further weight loss. I have even put back 3 lbs from the original 10 or so lost. I definately feel I didn't research this enough (personality flaw, just jump into things). I have no restriction in food amount. The only thing I do have is recurring difficulty getting things down due mostly to not chewing enough - bad habits take a while to change. I'm miserable, my husband truly thinks I've flipped my lid and nothing fits. My ownership over the last 6 months is in not watching my food types enough and not moving my body enough so I picked up a couple of workout tapes and get exercise when/wherever it presents itself like raking leaves etc. I just feel like an ultimate failure...and 16k poorer. I have had 3 fills and was rejected for my 4th because I was having to spit food back out all the time. I am going for my 4th fill in a couple of days come hell or hi-water. If liquids are the only thing I can get down after that so be it. I'll make sure they are as healthy as possible because my psyche is in deep trouble with my lack of success. This is no ones fault but my own but I do feel the procedure was misrepresented, or at least not presented as "truly" as it should have been. It's all a sales pitch I guess...buyer beware.:smile2:
  2. I got my first fill a few days ago and still have no restriction. I know it takes time and could take many fills to find my "sweet spot" but the waiting and frustration are killing me. I am still positive, especially after seeing some pictures posted on this site but must admit I am nervous that I paid 16k and won't see my goal weight. I can handle a 18-24 month period to get me there (I think) but am wondering if my expectations are too high and that I will most likely lose only half of the weight I need to lose. It all depends on me, I know that. I have started boot camp 3 times a week and trying to get back into running 2-3 times a week to help get me on track but boy....the same old habits are creeping back. I do phenomenally well until I get home around 5pm and then I totally fall apart! How can I have my act together for 2/3 of the day and so severely blow it the last 3-4 hours. The damage I do is nothing short of embarrassing. Since I do all of the cooking and "kitchen" stuff, it is difficult to step away. I have even thought of duct taping my hands!!!! Desperate to make this work for me. If anyone else shares this dilemma and has some great ideas, I would love to hear them. I know all about finding something else to do, go for a walk, read a book etc. Reality is, I can't even get out of the kitchen (cleaning up after dinner, making lunches, etc.). How do I change my mindset????????? I am truly desperate.:bored:
  3. Well, I am afraid to step on the scale again as I know I haven't lost any more. After my second fill I have had quite a few instances of food getting stuck. Usually associated with white bread and not chewing enough. I knew that slowing my eating (chewing well) would be one of the biggest challenges. It is but I'm having a really stressful summer and you know what happens then. I am almost ready for my third fill. I have been thinking about and trying to wrap my head around when the need for smaller portions will kick in. If the band is already on there, isn't the size of my stomach already reduced? I don't notice any difference and even if they top up my band, the stomach pouch will still be the same size won't it. Won't the opening into the stomach (band size) just be smaller. I guess my concern is, will it just be more difficult to eat normally because the opening to the stomach is smaller? Or, will my stomach actually be smaller with the next fill? I really don't want to get too many fills so I have to eat like a mouse. I guess this is where "my work" comes in. Time to face the music and stop relying 100% on the band and more on my self restraint huh?
  4. Well, neither of us made it into the 180 somethings and now holidays start so the goal is to NOT gain any weight - hope this is aggressive enough for a couple of weeks! Got my second fill yesterday. Very difficult handling any type of bread and I really notice that I have to chew smaller amounts and chew really well. This is what I have been waiting for. It is going to be a real challenge because I have always been a quick eater. Will probably stay away from bread all together. Hopefully this will work and the scale will begin to move. No boot camp for two weeks - yikes!
  5. So my girlfriend and I have a bet to see who can lose more weight by June 30th. We are exactly the same size. Loving a good challenge I set to work and am managing to see some numbers I haven't seen in a long time! She is doing well too so who knows who is going to win but I love the challenge. A bit of a stumble tonight (night time is my most challenging time of the day) but back at it tomorrow. My goal is to get into the 180's, even 189 would do. Fingers are crossed.:smile:
  6. Almost one month post-op and I have been on regular food for about 10 days. I'm terrified to step on the scale because I just haven't had much self control this past week. Went to dinner on two occasions at friends houses and wasn't able to show much restraint. So much food available. I much prefer to meet at restaurants where portions are limited and you only get what you order. Can't wait for my first fill. I hope there is some restriction. I know in my gut that the scale has probably gone up a couple of pounds but can't "face the music". I've heard that this time is called "bandster hell". My husband is looking for results! He is supportive but at the same time wants to see results for the $16k I spent on this (like there isn't enough pressure already). Of all the "addictions" to have, I had to pick food! Getting desperate.
  7. Well, I formally move onto less mushy foods today. Terrified! So much so that I am still eating the same things I ate on the last phase (yogurt, baby food, cream of wheat). I am afraid to open the flood gates. I had some peanut butter on a spoon, ate it slow, and boy did it stick like a ball of wax - not ready for that yet.
     
    I received a notice of a "bandsters" mtg. in my general area and they are meeting at an all-you-can-eat Chinese buffet restaurant! Isn't that like taking an alcoholic to a bar for a meeting? Aren't places like that what got us in trouble in the first place? Definately will NOT be going to those meetings. Trying to motivate myself to get back to exercising. I used to go to a strenuous boot camp 5 mornings a week. Would like to do that again - maybe 3 days and get back into running. A little too soon I think as I still have pain in my left side like a running cramp - start with walking I guess. Fingers are crossed!!!:smile:
  8. Hi Everyone
     
    My traditional Mothers Day brunch took a back seat to soup at a nice restaurant today. I felt like I lost a good friend. I know this will take time because food has been my friend for so long but honestly...it was really hard today. I have lost 10 lbs but am terrified that the scale will stay that way for the rest of the month! Wicked sweet cravings and am starving every 1.5-2 hrs so eat a little something (usually homemade soup or yogurt) when that happens. Is this normal and will I learn to feel differently about food once I get fills and reach the sweet spot? Sooooo nervous!:smile:
  9. I attended my second coffee mtg. Friday night. I really connect with one of the ladies there and after describing my insatiable eating from 7-9 pm, she suggested I set a behavioral goal for myself - just one mind you so it is not too overwhelming and I can truly focus on it. So my behavioral goal for this month is not to eat after 7pm every night! I can have tea, water etc. but no food. This will be interesting. The weight goal I have for myself is to lose 8 lbs by the end of June. I have an 8 day business trip coming up so not sure if that will help or hinder but here goes...wish me luck!

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