monk

Hi there, I am not a shrink but I think you need to talk to someone outside your marriage to get a bit of support and prospective.Your husband sounds like a bit of a bully and sometimes this kind of treatment backfires and creates an atmosphere where you may eat to gather back some kind of control in your life. We use food to comfort ourselves. Most eating disorders have underlying issues,constant harrassment by your husband may be one of them.How long have you thought about surgery? Don't jump into it because you feel it will save your marriage. This is about YOU, not him.See if there are any groups in your area you can talk to other people with a weight problem and get some support. Keep your options open and keep learning about all of them.I am going in this Thursday for my surgery. I am doing it for ME. I am a very lucky woman with a loving supportive husband who still calls me his little girl and I'll be 50 in September. I would not be going through with it I was "terrified".My doctor is also very supportive of my decision, even with going to Mexico. He feels it will be a blessing for my health. Talk to yours, see what she/he says. Best of luck, let us all know how you are doing. Monk

:clap2: Well, I'm on my way... Surgery with Dr. Ortiz this Thursday in Mexico.I feel as ready as I think I can.Found one other person that will be there the same time I am. Anyone else? This forum is a real inspiration and makes me feel secure knowing I always have somewhere to go and share what I am going through. After reading so many stories, questions and vents it is hard to believe that I'm finally making the big move, although I am still a bit unnerved at the immensity of my decision. It's HUGE..somewhat like my thighs... Wish me luck and I will let y'all know how it goes!