*susan*

Speaking of recently created profiles, hello pot, meet kettle!

See my answers in red...
You are being ridiculous and trying to take the attention off of the real issues here. Stop wasting my time and our member’s time with your ridiculous tactics.
Again, you are being ridiculous. Everyone on this site knows that I know Alex, THE founder of this website, not one of. Then again, everyone else knows him as well. And, once again, your reading and comprehension skills are truly lacking for someone who claims to be a teacher. Of course it is not predatory. I have been a volunteer member of the staff here for years. I worked for Alex for one year as a coordinator until I resigned because, as stated before, I received a promotion at my day job and was no longer able to continue to do both. Next, Alex is not a doctor, so your “Could such a relationship be considered predatory since you are a patient, as well?” statement just screams of ignorance on your part. Perhaps you ought to use your law enforcement skills a little better so you actually know what you are talking about.
I have never worked for a doctor. Sorry. There are those great reading, comprehension and law enforcement skills of yours again.
I already answered this. Practice your reading skills and find the answer.
Again, check your reading and comprehension skills. I have already covered this.
Some knew me from here, some I had referred to Dr. Illan, some were referred to me by other victims or other people who know me from here and outside of here and know that I am standing up for their rights. By the way, it is now eight. You seem to have a very difficult time understanding my connection with the bariatric community and the fact that I know a lot of people as a result.
I didn’t say they were all long time users. I said I have been a member here for years and many people here know me. And shockingly, I also have a life outside of here. This is not the only place where people know me from. Some people have joined because we requested they do so in order to share what has happened to them in the hopes that others do not experience the same thing. Others are long-term members who have created an alternate ID due to such wonderful people as you who like to bully victims.
Now, I am not and will not waste any more of my time answering the same questions over and over again simply because you have poor reading and comprehension skills and apparently suffer from some type of memory loss.
Instead of having Omar feed you information, I again challenge you to see if he has the cajones to man up and speak for himself. I am done with you. I have no time for enablers, and that is what you and the Omar worshippers are. You are all so in love with him, so hypnotized by him, that you continue to defend him knowing he is a criminal, knowing if he enters the US he will be arrested, and knowing he victimizes woman. By your insistence on defending him, you are enabling him to continue to take advantage of his patients.
I’ll be honest, I couldn’t really give two hoots about his sob story about his past. He made his decisions, he needs to take responsibility for them and accept the consequences instead of running to another country like a coward. What I do care about is that in no way, shape or form is it acceptable for any employee of a physician to take advantage of his patients and seek romantic/sexual relationships with them. Whether the patient is supposedly willing or not, it is his responsibility to not allow this to happen. He is unprofessional, unethical and has no morals, none! As I said, he is a pig and he disgusts me. I will defend these women in any way I know how.

And now. I leave you all to it till Sunday. Bill and I are at our first ever BBQ competition. Will be up most of the night tending the smoker.

I hate the player. I am disgusted by him. Some may have been willing participants of his shenanigans, but not all are. You don't randomly go into a patients room and start discussing your genitals for no reason. If you are a professional, you never have a relationship other than one of a professional nature with your patients. It is unethical to do that, it is unethical to accept gifts. There is no excuse for it.
And, I'm sorry. I must add this. Why, in this day and age with all the diseases out there would any intelligent person want to involve themselves in a casual sex relationship with someone who will sleep with any woman willing to spread her legs for him? Goodness, my health and self-respect are much more valuable to me than that.

Very, very good point. And someone like Omar is probably very aware of those effects and use them to his advantage.

I hate the player. I am disgusted by him. Some may have been willing participants of his shenanigans, but not all are. You don't randomly go into a patients room and start discussing your genitals for no reason. If you are a professional, you never have a relationship other than one of a professional nature with your patients. It is unethical to do that, it is unethical to accept gifts. There is no excuse for it.
And, I'm sorry. I must add this. Why, in this day and age with all the diseases out there would any intelligent person want to involve themselves in a casual sex relationship with someone who will sleep with any woman willing to spread her legs for him? Goodness, my health and self-respect are much more valuable to me than that.

I hate the player. I am disgusted by him. Some may have been willing participants of his shenanigans, but not all are. You don't randomly go into a patients room and start discussing your genitals for no reason. If you are a professional, you never have a relationship other than one of a professional nature with your patients. It is unethical to do that, it is unethical to accept gifts. There is no excuse for it.
And, I'm sorry. I must add this. Why, in this day and age with all the diseases out there would any intelligent person want to involve themselves in a casual sex relationship with someone who will sleep with any woman willing to spread her legs for him? Goodness, my health and self-respect are much more valuable to me than that.

I appreciate your story and commend you for realizing what you were getting into and "playing the game" anyways. That said, you say he's a typical man? Uhm... no. Not so much. If this is the type of man that is typical in YOUR life, I feel for you and I say that with all sincerity.
I've met very few men in my life (once past the sorority/fraternity days) that this behavior is typical of. In fact, most men I know prefer to be with one woman, in a loving partnership, having outgrown the "player" stage while in college. In fact, even when living in the sorority house, the "players" were far less common than the REAL men, those who actually had respect for the women in their lives.
"Men" who act like you've described are nothing more than self centered narcissistic children, and that's OK, as long as they are not breaking any ethical codes, which I do believe is the issue here. REAL men are a whole 'nother breed.

To be clear - I support everyone telling their story and no one being blamed or shamed for that story. The name calling etc does no one any good. What I'm pointing to is that in your experience you were not taken advantage of by Omar. Others feel like they were victimized by him. Your positive experience does not negate their negative experience. And vice versa.

Bwhite said:
VSGAnn2014 and Shellief,

Thank you for your support. It was not easy reading all the posts. It was not easy trying to decide if I had been "played" or not. I did a lot of thinking and a lot of praying, and a lot of discussing it with my bff and with Omar.

I had to come to the realization that I am a big girl and I am ultimately in control of my decisions. Just like every other adult on this site. We can blame Omar all we want. I really wanted to. I did. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized I am just in it to have fun. Nothing more. So why not go back and forth to TJ to see him and take him nice things? I can afford it!!

He said nice things to me. He paid extra attention to me. He didn't drug me or force me to do anything. Ladies, he is a full blown player. Either deal with it or don't play the freaking game. It is YOUR choice.

Bwhite,
Here's where we differ. You're a woman of the world -- a "big girl" to use your terms. Fair enough. In your case, no harm, no foul. You found the game worthwhile, and you played a player. Again, fair enough.
But everyone who got played by The Fabulous Omar doesn't have the same emotional resources, background, and resilience that you do. Not everyone who's a bariatric patient is in an informed position to consider carefully their responses within 24 hours post-surgery to a "player" who comes onto them hard and strong.
And that is why there are rules against players like Omar playing medical patients. In some countries (most countries?) there are actual laws against it. But in every situation, there are (in my opinion -- everyone obviously doesn't agree with me) moral rules against taking advantage of people to satisfy your own interests when they are IN YOUR CARE. And no one can say that during the medical experience one undergoes as a patient of Dr. Illan that they are not in the medical care of The Fabulous Omar.
See, that's my beef about this. Who is it that does the calculation that Patient X will be damaged by Omar's seductions and Patient Y will not be damaged by Omar's seductions? Obviously, The Fabulous Omar isn't in a position to do that and doesn't even attempt it.
He may be a player, to use your term. But in my book, being a player has a lot of manipulative, nasty aspects to the term. He's a lot of other things, too. He's a gigolo who seeks the most he can get (sexually and financially) for his services. And he's a nasty piece of work.
So I fall on the side of those here who think Dr. Illan should fire The Fabulous Omar's ass. One of these ladies who fell prey to his charms and wasn't a player may wind up filing charges against Dr. Illan. If so, they'll probably be motivated by a range of emotions to do so. But they may very well have the law on their side, too.
Dr. Illan, you're crazy if you keep Omar on your staff. If he's determined to make his living this way, let him work your patients from across the street.

Speaking of recently created profiles, hello pot, meet kettle!

You are missing the point. Three women have given testimonials to their experience. You can not argue that their experience is not their experience... The people who had excellent experiences are free to make their testimonials as well. That is what is true for them.
To say people who are pointing this out are "incapable of seeking the actual truth..." is disingenuous. It's actual the other way around. I can allow that 100s of people have had great - life changing experiences with Dr Illam and Omar. And can also allow that at least three women have had bad experiences. Life and people are messy. It can be both good and bad at the same time. Confusing? Yes. And it's reality.
I am sorry to hear that Omar has a record for wanting to be with his family. The US has a mess on its hands with immigration with no easy solutions. I know and love many people in the US without papers. Unfortunately, that still makes him a felon and still raises red flags that a surgeon - especially a skilled surgeon - would have a felon on staff. Again, if others have no problem with it - then by all means go to Dr Illam. However, this info needs to be out there so people can make a choice.

Well, first off, any posts that were deleted and members that were banned would have been done by one person only, Alex. He is the founder of the website, and he makes those decisions. So, that is a question neither myself nor Lipsticklady can answer.
Next, Whitney, for someone who has posted many, many times about having a real life with real friends, you have spent a great deal of time in this thread trying to discredit myself and the six woman who have been brave enough to come forward with their experiences. I wonder why? What exactly is your relationship and how do you benefit from protecting Omar? And, more importantly, why have you insisted on trying to make this thread about you, and to make yourself out to be the victim here? This is NOT about WHITNEY. This is about a coordinator who has been reported as having made unwelcome advances on patients, and entering into inappropriate relationships with them. How about we address that instead? This is about putting the word out there so other woman who are traveling to Mexico are aware of what could potentially happen to them so they can make an informed choice. Lets talk about the real issues here, if you wish to discuss your offense at Alex for removing your posts or banning you (which you obviously don't understand what being banned means), then private message him, private message me or open your own thread. In fact, I invite you to do that, so this thread may get back to the real issues at hand, which, despite some of you and your cohorts best efforts to declare otherwise, is very real and very serious. One that people have a right to know about.

I am very sorry that all of you feel the way you do. As stated before, my goal here is simply to make people aware and hopefully help someone avoid being in a similar situation. have the letters from the patients, they have the copies of the texts, emails, etc. If you want to accuse me slander, libel or anything else, you may. I have been aware of wrongdoings since last September, and am just now sharing based upon evidence gathered.
Once again, for those of you who had a good experience, and I don't deny, there are many, I couldn't be happier that you did. And, I truly mean that. But, understand, not everyone has had the same positive experience as you. With many victims of any form of abuse, they are often afraid to come out and speak for themselves. This thread shows good reason why, because people would be attacking them, stating it was somehow their fault. They are in a very fragile way right now, emotionally speaking, and some are in therapy. The last thing they need is a group of people attacking them and saying "I had a wonderful experience, he was a perfect gentleman with me, so you must be telling lies, what is wrong with you."
I will not apologize for the fact that I have made a lot of connections in the bariatric community, and that in the process, I have learned a lot, good, bad and otherwise. I could keep what I know to myself, but what kind of person would that make me? It would make me the kind of person who is afraid of others, and afraid to stand up for what is right. I would be an accomplish, condoning their actions if I just stand by and allow it to happen. I won't name names, but one of the very people who condemned me in this thread actually messaged me thereafter admitting she knows what is going on and is friends with one of the people, yet she chastised me on here. I am not that kind of person. I care about people. I want people to have good experiences. I won't have knowledge of things that are completely inappropriate and turn a blind eye to it. You can be a part of the problem, or a part of the solution. I choose the latter.. This thread has done what I set out to do, which is bring awareness to an inappropriate situation. Maybe, just by bringing it to light, Omar will take heed and redeem himself and change his ways. I knew from the onset his supporters would attack me, I expected it, I expected accusations to be made against me and have not been disappointed. I am not here to defend myself. I am here to defend the woman who are the victims.
Have a nice evening all.

1. No. I did coordinating for Bariatric Pal's service for one year until I resigned after receiving a promotion at my regular job and no longer was able to do both.
2. None
3. No, but I did refer patients to them.
I work for a national construction research and education company, they have nothing to do with bariatrics. No competition involved. I am 48 years old, engaged, have two children, two dogs, and live in a small house in the woods.
I was sleeved by the doctor the former poster claimed I had no experience with.
I have the permission and blessing of all the woman to speak out on their behalf in the hopes that other woman will be more aware of what may or may not happen to them and hopefully prevent them from becoming victims.
I feel sad that woman are so unwilling to stand up for others, and are so quick to assume that because something did not happen to them and they had a good experience, it must be the same for everyone else.
I personally referred some of these woman to this doctor, and in part, feel responsible for the emotional distress they are now in. Others have sought me out because they know I have connections, and am a well-known voice in the bariatric world.
Anything else you want to know about me?

Un-named person, my understanding is you started the Facebook group, so again, I would expect your comments. Although, I also understand Omar was quite flirty with you and your husband was not appreciative. As I stated in my original post, I fully expected Omar's fan club to stand up for him and respond in full force to this thread. I wouldn't expect anything less from Omar to have his followers respond to this, and I am sure he has contacted Alex demanding removal of this thread. However, I posted this with his approval. I am simply posting fact. Again, while you may not have experienced this and had a great experience, many woman have not had the same experience as you. Just because it did not happen to you, doesn't mean these women were not taken advantage of. Just because a robber did not rob your bank, doesn't mean he is not a robber, just because a pedophile did not molest your child doesn't mean he is not a pedophile, just because a murderer did not murder you, does not mean he isn't a murderer. And, just because nothing inappropriate happened with you, it does not mean he wasn't inappropriate with others. People have a right to know, and I am going to make sure they know. If they take what I have shared, still choose Dr. Illan and Omar, and then have a bad experience, they can't say they were not warned.

Whitney, instead of assuming I am simply a "virtual friend" as you like to say, or that nothing happened, or accusing me of having no life outside of here (which is really simply grasping for anything to argue about instead of the very serious situation of which I am addressing), how about posting why you feel that because this did not happen to you, it could not possibly have happened to anyone else? This is a serious, serious situation, and for you to make light of it concerns me. I could share why you are apparently making light of this, from what others are sharing with me, but first, I am curious to hear your reasoning.

Whitney, your post just makes me sad. Are you also one of these who feels when a woman was raped, she deserved it because of the way she was dressed?
 
As I said, I expected backlash from Omar's fans. However, as I said, just because he was not inappropriate with you, does not mean he wasn't with others. I am happy you had a a good experience with him, I truly am. The answer to your question is yes, these were adult woman, not minors. Do not continue to make them feel bad, as I stated, while you may be of a stronger personality, many woman who go to Mexico are not, and are in a very vulnerable state and people like Omar are able to see just who these woman are and take advantage of that. They did nothing wrong. Any person in the US, doctor or employee of a doctor, who had any type of such interactions/relationship with a patient would have been considered unprofessional and immoral. They would have been dismissed from their position and most likely facing criminal charges.
 
These woman were taken advantage of, they were wronged. Shame on you for condoning it simply because they are adults.
 
And, unlike you, a new member, I have been here for 8 years, administered these forums, worked with the Mexico doctors and have many, many connections with them. This is based on fact, not rumors. I am looking out for and protecting innocent woman, therefore, my post stands.

Many of you on here know me well, I have been a part of these message boards for years. I love our members and I want only the best for them. Therefore, I can not in good conscience keep this to myself any longer.
Dr. Illan is a wonderful surgeon. In fact, when I used to coordinate, for a while I actually referred patients to him. His coordinator, Omar, has a very, very faithful following. So much so, I fully expect and am prepared for the "verbal beating" I am going to get for going public with what I know. But, if I prevent just one woman from experiencing what I am about to share with you, then it will all be worth it.
As I said, Omar is very well loved among the patients, especially the ladies. He goes out of his way to ensure everyone has a great experience while there. He provides for the patient's every need, transports them around town, runs errands for them, sits by their bedside and so much more. He is very charming and charismatic. There will be many, many members who will respond to this thread stating just that. In fact, when the first patient, one that I had referred to them, approached me about what happened to her, I did her a horrible disservice by not really believing what she told me, because Omar did such a good job of convincing me otherwise. But now, after six woman, some of whom I referred to Dr. Illan, some not, have contacted me regarding what happened to them, I know now that first patient was telling me the truth, she did not misinterpret anything and I must speak out.
So, what is it that I am speaking off? I am talking about taking advantage of woman who have traveled to a foreign country by themselves, most likely have low self-esteem due to their weight issues, they are scared and they are lonely. Then, along comes Omar. He is by their side throughout their stay. He is, as I said before, charming and charismatic. They very quickly find themselves falling victim to him, and he takes advantage of them in several different ways. He either is sexually suggestive to them, sexually inappropriate, or convinces these woman he truly cares for/loves them and begins a romantic relationship with them. Because of how vulnerable they are, they believe he really does care about them, and they allow themselves to be wooed by him and have a romantic and/or sexual relationship with him. Then, shortly after, he basically dumps them. He quits responding to their calls, texts, etc. He leaves these woman feeling broken and foolish for falling for him. They feel like they have done something wrong, when in fact, they are merely the victim of a heartless man taking extreme advantage of his position and their vulnerability. Understand, I am not saying this happens with every patient, but it does happen and it shows an extreme lack of professionalism and moral character.
I have attempted to contact Dr. Illan to speak with him personally about this. Unfortunately, Omar makes that nearly impossible. All calls, emails, etc. are intercepted by him. And, here is the saddest part of all, Dr. Illan already knows what is going on. So, I am doubtful my talking to him would make a difference. Dr. Illan knows Omar has a strong fan base, and therefore, brings him a great deal of business. So, he turns a blind eye to what is happening. Which, is why I have no guilt in publicly coming out and sharing what I know. I will be honest, my goal here is to have Omar removed from his position as coordinator with Baja Bariatrics and Dr. Illan, and to see that he does not work in this field or any other field where he can take advantage of woman again. And, if Dr. Illan goes down as a result, well, shame on him for allowing it to happen in the first place.

Speaking of recently created profiles, hello pot, meet kettle!

Speaking of recently created profiles, hello pot, meet kettle!

Bingo! Medical Ethics does not just apply to the doctor, it applies to the entire staff. The doctor is merely responsible in the end. I think it is clear that the doctor is aware of this behavior and he's doing nothing about it. You can like him as a surgeon, heck, you can credit him for your own hard work in losing weight. It does not make it right to allow this to continue when you ladies have the power to do something about it. Put the screws to Illan to fix this problem! Be the solution, not the problem.
I would hope ALL these women file formal ethics charges for these behaviors. If not, you are only helping him to continue the behavior. So far the women I have seen that are telling their stories are taking partial responsibility for their own actions in these incidents. Being a responsible adult means fixing our past errors, not pretending like it didn't happen.
Let's see what Illan is *really* all about. Prove to us that he actually cares about patients. Do something or acknowledge you don't care what your doc is made up of.
As for you, Maestrita- Put up or finally shut up and go away. If you can defend your own claims, by all means! Do so! Susan answered your questions, now pay up hunny. It's your turn. If you do not we can know you are totally unable to do so. And btw, Latin Lover is NOT NOT NOT a racial slur. I work with a ton of Latino men. I swear to God, the next 10 guys I see I am flat out going to ask them, is "Latin Lover" a racial slur or a compliment? We will let THEM decide.
BTW, what are you? I am about ready to come up with a racial slur for you but I don't know what you are. White? Mexican? Italian? Or just overall gang groupie with benefits?
I still do not know what anyone sees in Omar. First we have his silly name, then we have his photo. I swear, he had to use drugs or something to seduce these woman. Seriously, eww. A vulnerable patient chasing, convicted felon, (apparently) still wanted in the US, an illegal alien, and proud founder of a Latino gang. Good grief. What a disgusting POS. Not only did the taxpayers have to pay his undeserved education (and likely food/medical as well) but we had to pay for his crimes and prison time. What a treat for the US.
Bleh.
Let's DO something about this. We can talk about it for another month and that will do nothing. Let's DO something about it.

Maestrita, you wrote, " I did defend Omar. He's not a saint, but he's not who's been painted here. He's had a hard life, and he's made some bad choices, but he's not a predatory, either. "
So why is it you don't believe the experiences of the three women who posted in this thread? In a thread you started back in January you rightfully asked people to respect your experience of not being informed by your doctor about the complication rate with the band. You were right in that thread to defend your own experience and I applaud you for standing up for your experience. However, in that same line of thought, it is hypocritical of you to now disavow the experiences of these women for whom he is a predator - and for you to say otherwise is just like the people who jumped all over you about being upset about your experience with the band. You can't argue with their experience. Please don't let your survival mechanism get the better of you - you are a teacher and have a history in law enforcement - you are clearly smart and well educated. Something about this has gotten you personally hooked. If you had a great experience with Dr Illam and Omar, the experiences of these women don't diminish you or your great experience. I hope you find some clarity and peace around your friendship with Omar.
People who are considering having surgery with Dr Illam have a right to know his coordinator is a felon. It brings into question the wisdom and clarity of thought he uses to run his practice. For some it may make no difference at all. For me, I would never use a doctor who employes a felon.

@@*susan* I really commend your patience in continuing to answer these questions. Pity the Omar groupies continue to try and deflect attention from the real issue.

See my answers in red...
You are being ridiculous and trying to take the attention off of the real issues here. Stop wasting my time and our member’s time with your ridiculous tactics.
Again, you are being ridiculous. Everyone on this site knows that I know Alex, THE founder of this website, not one of. Then again, everyone else knows him as well. And, once again, your reading and comprehension skills are truly lacking for someone who claims to be a teacher. Of course it is not predatory. I have been a volunteer member of the staff here for years. I worked for Alex for one year as a coordinator until I resigned because, as stated before, I received a promotion at my day job and was no longer able to continue to do both. Next, Alex is not a doctor, so your “Could such a relationship be considered predatory since you are a patient, as well?” statement just screams of ignorance on your part. Perhaps you ought to use your law enforcement skills a little better so you actually know what you are talking about.
I have never worked for a doctor. Sorry. There are those great reading, comprehension and law enforcement skills of yours again.
I already answered this. Practice your reading skills and find the answer.
Again, check your reading and comprehension skills. I have already covered this.
Some knew me from here, some I had referred to Dr. Illan, some were referred to me by other victims or other people who know me from here and outside of here and know that I am standing up for their rights. By the way, it is now eight. You seem to have a very difficult time understanding my connection with the bariatric community and the fact that I know a lot of people as a result.
I didn’t say they were all long time users. I said I have been a member here for years and many people here know me. And shockingly, I also have a life outside of here. This is not the only place where people know me from. Some people have joined because we requested they do so in order to share what has happened to them in the hopes that others do not experience the same thing. Others are long-term members who have created an alternate ID due to such wonderful people as you who like to bully victims.
Now, I am not and will not waste any more of my time answering the same questions over and over again simply because you have poor reading and comprehension skills and apparently suffer from some type of memory loss.
Instead of having Omar feed you information, I again challenge you to see if he has the cajones to man up and speak for himself. I am done with you. I have no time for enablers, and that is what you and the Omar worshippers are. You are all so in love with him, so hypnotized by him, that you continue to defend him knowing he is a criminal, knowing if he enters the US he will be arrested, and knowing he victimizes woman. By your insistence on defending him, you are enabling him to continue to take advantage of his patients.
I’ll be honest, I couldn’t really give two hoots about his sob story about his past. He made his decisions, he needs to take responsibility for them and accept the consequences instead of running to another country like a coward. What I do care about is that in no way, shape or form is it acceptable for any employee of a physician to take advantage of his patients and seek romantic/sexual relationships with them. Whether the patient is supposedly willing or not, it is his responsibility to not allow this to happen. He is unprofessional, unethical and has no morals, none! As I said, he is a pig and he disgusts me. I will defend these women in any way I know how.