SpartanMaker

Sorry ahead of time, this is going to be a long post!
Let's talk a bit about what causes stalls/plateaus:
The most common reason for any stall (including the dreaded 3-week stall), is simply that you are retaining more Water. There are a few reasons this happens, from hormonal shifts, tissue repair, illness, or changes due to glycogen vs. ketone metabolism. This post would be even longer if I spent too much time here, but suffice it to say that for many people (especially early in the process), they are just retaining water and not actually failing to lose fat. As you lose more weight, your overall metabolic rate will slow down. People sometimes think fat is not metabolically active, but that's not true. Losing fat means your metabolism slows down, even if you retain the same amount of muscle mass (which most people don't). This means that as you lose weight, it takes less effort to move or even just live, so the amount of calories you burn both during exercise and just living also drops quite a bit. On the intake side as you progress after bariatric surgery, you'll be able to eat more. This isn't a bad thing and is by design, but obviously you should be able to see the problem here. Your metabolism has slowed down and now you can eat more. This can lead to you basically eating as much as you're burning. When that happens, weight loss stops. Especially if you're not tracking intake closely by weighing and measuring your food, you can easily be eating a lot more than you think. Some studies have shown people underestimate caloric consumption by several hundred calories on average. This is more than enough to cause a stall. This one may be TMI for some, but you may simply be retaining more stool. Feeling constipated? That will definitely impact your weight. This is going to be hard for some people to hear, but I can tell you one thing it's not, and that's hormones. Yes, various hormonal processes negatively impact weight loss in a myriad of ways, but they don't overcome the basic fact that if you eat fewer calories than you are burning, you'll lose weight. What these hormones can do if they're out of whack, is bad things like slowing your metabolism even more, increasing your hunger, screwing with water weight, or even fooling you into thinking you're eating less than you are. So, that's all great, but what do we actually do if we're in a stall? Well, I think it depends on when it happens and how long it lasts:
If it's early (a.k.a. the 3-week stall), just keep doing what you're doing and you should be fine. I know people don't like that advice, but as I said it's just water, so don't worry about it.
Later on, especially if the stall is lasting longer than 2-3 weeks. that's when I think it's important that you look closely at what you are actually burning, as well as really tracking what you are eating. If you don't know your RMR (Resting Metabolic Rate), you should. The closer you are to goal, the harder it is to get the balance right between intake and output to make sure you're not eating too much, so fixing this starts with knowing your RMR and accurate food logging.
There's a lot of anecdotal advice thrown around about "ways to break a stall", but there seems to be little scientific evidence for any of it. It certainly won't hurt to try things like breaking up your routine in terms of diet or exercise, but just understand that this change may or may not have any impact. If it makes you feel better to be proactive, go for it.
Longer term, there is one piece of solid advice that's backed up by lots of research: Even if you don't really like working out, do it anyway. Those WLS patients that make a regular habit of exercising for 45 minutes to an hour most days a week are significantly more likely to reach their goal and maintain the weight loss. (One caveat here: significantly changing your exercise routine can make you retain water and possibly even add muscle, so don't freak out if you see a stall or even a gain.)
I'll take that exercise advice one step further and say you really should be doing some form of strength training. This is also backed up by lots of studies, but the great thing about strength training is that it makes your burn more calories even at rest (in other words, it increases your metabolic rate). There are lots of other benefits, but the metabolic benefit is the most germaine to the stall question. Those that do strength training are less likely to stall during weight loss and are more likely to reach and then maintain their goal weight long term.

@Arabesque and @liveaboard15 already mentioned the issue with Calcium interfering with Iron absorption, but I wanted to make sure you knew that even dietary calcium like milk or yogurt will cause this. I think sometimes people forget about what they're eating and just think about supplemental calcium like chews.

I drink Decaf and use some of a Premier Protein caramel drink as the "creamer". It works for me, get's me a bit more Protein in my diet and avoids the sugar.

I'm new here as well. Scheduled for Sept 20th.

I love the outdoors, so hiking/backpacking and trail running are my main cardio exercises right now. I also strength train 2-4 times a week, depending on what routine I'm doing and what else I'm doing cardio-wise. Before surgery, I would have been pushing it to walk to the end of the block, so I mostly just didn't bother.
To me, I don't think of any of the activities I do strictly as something to help me lose or maintain weight. Honestly, fat loss mostly comes from the kitchen, Instead, I partake in these activities because I enjoy them, but perhaps even more importantly, they make me healthier and will hopefully lead to more time here on this planet.
Regarding loose skin, I have been able to "fill in" some of it on my arms and legs with muscle. I attribute this to my overall workout plan, not to any specific thing.
You didn't really ask, but I wanted to share a few additional things with you:
While as you've seen in this thread not everyone is active post-surgery, the data is clear on this: those bariatric surgery patients that partake in at least 60 minutes of moderate physical activity 5-6 days a week are significantly more likely to reach their goal weight and maintain their weight-loss long-term. That does not mean you can't be successful without exercise, but it does mean you can greatly tip the odds in your favor if you're active. Both cardio and strength training are important. While cardiovascular exercise has obvious heart-health benefits (that's why it's called cardio after all), it also helps with your overall physical endurance and energy levels, so everything else you do physically just becomes a lot easier. Strength training, in addition to helping you look and feel better physically also increases your metabolism so that you burn even more calories even at rest. It's hard to argue with the benefits of that on weight loss. Strength training will have no direct effect on loose skin. As I implied above, what it can do is help fill out that loose skin with some muscle instead of fat. This is probably going to be more in the arms and legs than in your belly for obvious reasons. Keep in mind though that your ability to add muscle mass is highly impacted by age, genetics, epigenetics, diet and biological sex, among other things. My point is that while some people can "fill in" that lose skin by adding muscle mass, it's by no means assured or even realistic for most of us. It's sometimes misleading to think of strength training as the only thing that builds muscle. Even just walking can help, depending of where you're starting from. Like all exercise, the key is continuing to progress. Once you stagnate, you'll stop improving your health. In short, I highly recommend partaking in both cardio and strength training. If you need help knowing what to do, seek out the assistance of a reputable trainer.

I love the outdoors, so hiking/backpacking and trail running are my main cardio exercises right now. I also strength train 2-4 times a week, depending on what routine I'm doing and what else I'm doing cardio-wise. Before surgery, I would have been pushing it to walk to the end of the block, so I mostly just didn't bother.
To me, I don't think of any of the activities I do strictly as something to help me lose or maintain weight. Honestly, fat loss mostly comes from the kitchen, Instead, I partake in these activities because I enjoy them, but perhaps even more importantly, they make me healthier and will hopefully lead to more time here on this planet.
Regarding loose skin, I have been able to "fill in" some of it on my arms and legs with muscle. I attribute this to my overall workout plan, not to any specific thing.
You didn't really ask, but I wanted to share a few additional things with you:
While as you've seen in this thread not everyone is active post-surgery, the data is clear on this: those bariatric surgery patients that partake in at least 60 minutes of moderate physical activity 5-6 days a week are significantly more likely to reach their goal weight and maintain their weight-loss long-term. That does not mean you can't be successful without exercise, but it does mean you can greatly tip the odds in your favor if you're active. Both cardio and strength training are important. While cardiovascular exercise has obvious heart-health benefits (that's why it's called cardio after all), it also helps with your overall physical endurance and energy levels, so everything else you do physically just becomes a lot easier. Strength training, in addition to helping you look and feel better physically also increases your metabolism so that you burn even more calories even at rest. It's hard to argue with the benefits of that on weight loss. Strength training will have no direct effect on loose skin. As I implied above, what it can do is help fill out that loose skin with some muscle instead of fat. This is probably going to be more in the arms and legs than in your belly for obvious reasons. Keep in mind though that your ability to add muscle mass is highly impacted by age, genetics, epigenetics, diet and biological sex, among other things. My point is that while some people can "fill in" that lose skin by adding muscle mass, it's by no means assured or even realistic for most of us. It's sometimes misleading to think of strength training as the only thing that builds muscle. Even just walking can help, depending of where you're starting from. Like all exercise, the key is continuing to progress. Once you stagnate, you'll stop improving your health. In short, I highly recommend partaking in both cardio and strength training. If you need help knowing what to do, seek out the assistance of a reputable trainer.

I tend to just say "eating less and moving more". It's factually correct and avoids any judgements or follow-up questions I might get if I went into more detail regarding surgery or my specific diet & exercise routine.

I tend to just say "eating less and moving more". It's factually correct and avoids any judgements or follow-up questions I might get if I went into more detail regarding surgery or my specific diet & exercise routine.

The only real way to know this would be to have your Basal or Resting Metabolic Rate analyzed. While BMR and RMR are technically slightly different, they are often used interchangeably. The tests to determine this are readily available in clinics and even some gyms. You should be able to find some options by googling something like "metabolic testing near me". Note that there are a few different types of tests used (feel free to research them), and some are a bit more accurate than others, but they are generally pretty close.
Alternately, there are online calculators that you can use, and even some digital scales (those that use BIA), that can also provide either your BMR or RMR. Unfortunately, neither the scales or calculators are all that accurate. It's not uncommon for those to be off by 10 or even 20%. Obviously more than enough to have you potentially eating too much.

Well, since you wanted things to read:
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/1333426/
Yes. people even study how much poop weighs.

Sorry ahead of time, this is going to be a long post!
Let's talk a bit about what causes stalls/plateaus:
The most common reason for any stall (including the dreaded 3-week stall), is simply that you are retaining more Water. There are a few reasons this happens, from hormonal shifts, tissue repair, illness, or changes due to glycogen vs. ketone metabolism. This post would be even longer if I spent too much time here, but suffice it to say that for many people (especially early in the process), they are just retaining water and not actually failing to lose fat. As you lose more weight, your overall metabolic rate will slow down. People sometimes think fat is not metabolically active, but that's not true. Losing fat means your metabolism slows down, even if you retain the same amount of muscle mass (which most people don't). This means that as you lose weight, it takes less effort to move or even just live, so the amount of calories you burn both during exercise and just living also drops quite a bit. On the intake side as you progress after bariatric surgery, you'll be able to eat more. This isn't a bad thing and is by design, but obviously you should be able to see the problem here. Your metabolism has slowed down and now you can eat more. This can lead to you basically eating as much as you're burning. When that happens, weight loss stops. Especially if you're not tracking intake closely by weighing and measuring your food, you can easily be eating a lot more than you think. Some studies have shown people underestimate caloric consumption by several hundred calories on average. This is more than enough to cause a stall. This one may be TMI for some, but you may simply be retaining more stool. Feeling constipated? That will definitely impact your weight. This is going to be hard for some people to hear, but I can tell you one thing it's not, and that's hormones. Yes, various hormonal processes negatively impact weight loss in a myriad of ways, but they don't overcome the basic fact that if you eat fewer calories than you are burning, you'll lose weight. What these hormones can do if they're out of whack, is bad things like slowing your metabolism even more, increasing your hunger, screwing with water weight, or even fooling you into thinking you're eating less than you are. So, that's all great, but what do we actually do if we're in a stall? Well, I think it depends on when it happens and how long it lasts:
If it's early (a.k.a. the 3-week stall), just keep doing what you're doing and you should be fine. I know people don't like that advice, but as I said it's just water, so don't worry about it.
Later on, especially if the stall is lasting longer than 2-3 weeks. that's when I think it's important that you look closely at what you are actually burning, as well as really tracking what you are eating. If you don't know your RMR (Resting Metabolic Rate), you should. The closer you are to goal, the harder it is to get the balance right between intake and output to make sure you're not eating too much, so fixing this starts with knowing your RMR and accurate food logging.
There's a lot of anecdotal advice thrown around about "ways to break a stall", but there seems to be little scientific evidence for any of it. It certainly won't hurt to try things like breaking up your routine in terms of diet or exercise, but just understand that this change may or may not have any impact. If it makes you feel better to be proactive, go for it.
Longer term, there is one piece of solid advice that's backed up by lots of research: Even if you don't really like working out, do it anyway. Those WLS patients that make a regular habit of exercising for 45 minutes to an hour most days a week are significantly more likely to reach their goal and maintain the weight loss. (One caveat here: significantly changing your exercise routine can make you retain water and possibly even add muscle, so don't freak out if you see a stall or even a gain.)
I'll take that exercise advice one step further and say you really should be doing some form of strength training. This is also backed up by lots of studies, but the great thing about strength training is that it makes your burn more calories even at rest (in other words, it increases your metabolic rate). There are lots of other benefits, but the metabolic benefit is the most germaine to the stall question. Those that do strength training are less likely to stall during weight loss and are more likely to reach and then maintain their goal weight long term.

Well, obviously I'm in the minority here, and that's fine.
I do feel like corn tortillas may be getting a bad rap?
While they certainly aren't the most nutritious food in the world, they are a whole grain complex carbohydrate that contains Fiber, as well as several Vitamins and minerals. They are typically low in calories (roughly 50 per tortilla), low in fat and are especially high in zinc.
Compared to plain flour tortillas, corn tortillas are definitely the better choice.
Note that some of the most Protein rich dinners I'm eating right now are tacos and enchiladas, so I don't see a problem with them at all as long as you eat them with protein.
I also don't get the safety concern. They are made from ground hominy (typically finely ground), and are pretty homogeneous. They are also easy to chew. Also, unlike wheat flour products, they don't tend to "gum up" in the guts. Maybe I'm missing something there, but these should be fine?
For the record, at 4 weeks, my plan said to: "focus on low-fat solid foods". A corn tortilla is certainly a low-fat solid food. I was also supposed to eat "protein first, then vegetables and fruit, and limit grains and starchy foods". No foods were specifically off limits at 4 weeks or later. Tortillas definitely fall into the "grains and starchy foods" part, but I probably only eat a few tortillas a week. I'm pretty sure that qualifies as "limiting them".
As far as I'm concerned, it's all about balance and these work for me.

Glad you both found something that's working for you!
The data is pretty clear that WLS patients that partake in at least 200 minutes a week of moderate to strenuous physical activity are significantly more likely to maintain their weight loss.
Not everyone will be able to tolerate running for one reason or another due to impact on joints, but there are lots of other activities that will work as well.

This is good advice. What you're experiencing is something called adaptive thermogenesis in the scientific literature. In effect, your body adapts to your restricted intake by also reducing the amount of calories you burn.
As much as we hate it, this is actually a evolutionary advantage. When our bodies detect "lean times", they adapt to make sure you survive long enough to make it to the next time of plenty. This was important over most of human history because we we didn't always know where the next meal would come from.
To break out of this adaptation where you body is "helping" you survive, you should try to do something different. Varying your macros as suggested above, varying your exercise routine, or potentially even upping the number of calories you eat for a while can all "reset" the metabolic changes that caused the stall.
Now that said, even if you changed nothing, it's unlikely the stall will last forever. At the end of the day, your body can only slow your metabolism so much. If you prefer to wait it out, that should eventually work as well as long as you are sticking to your plan.

As always, @Arabesque is spot on.
I see that you are are only a few days post-surgery, so the one thing I'd add is that everything you're feeling is 100% NORMAL at this point. We all start second-guessing our decision early on because having WLS is HARD! How you eat, how you feel and how you look is radically changing every day. It's physically and emotionally challenging. The good news is it gets easier as you progress.
I told my wife she only had one job post-surgery. When (not if), I started doubting my decision, she needed to remind me of all the reasons I decided to have the surgery in the first place. I tell you this because I feel like you may need a similar reminder right now. You know your own reasons for taking this journey.
It's easy at this point to think the challenges you're going through are not worth the hoped for end goal, but they are. Remember that it WILL get easier over time and you can absolutely reach those goals you set for yourself. Right now, it's all new and confusing and frankly most of us worry this is how life will be forever. It's not. You will make it past this, just like the rest of us did.

As always, @Arabesque is spot on.
I see that you are are only a few days post-surgery, so the one thing I'd add is that everything you're feeling is 100% NORMAL at this point. We all start second-guessing our decision early on because having WLS is HARD! How you eat, how you feel and how you look is radically changing every day. It's physically and emotionally challenging. The good news is it gets easier as you progress.
I told my wife she only had one job post-surgery. When (not if), I started doubting my decision, she needed to remind me of all the reasons I decided to have the surgery in the first place. I tell you this because I feel like you may need a similar reminder right now. You know your own reasons for taking this journey.
It's easy at this point to think the challenges you're going through are not worth the hoped for end goal, but they are. Remember that it WILL get easier over time and you can absolutely reach those goals you set for yourself. Right now, it's all new and confusing and frankly most of us worry this is how life will be forever. It's not. You will make it past this, just like the rest of us did.

As always, @Arabesque is spot on.
I see that you are are only a few days post-surgery, so the one thing I'd add is that everything you're feeling is 100% NORMAL at this point. We all start second-guessing our decision early on because having WLS is HARD! How you eat, how you feel and how you look is radically changing every day. It's physically and emotionally challenging. The good news is it gets easier as you progress.
I told my wife she only had one job post-surgery. When (not if), I started doubting my decision, she needed to remind me of all the reasons I decided to have the surgery in the first place. I tell you this because I feel like you may need a similar reminder right now. You know your own reasons for taking this journey.
It's easy at this point to think the challenges you're going through are not worth the hoped for end goal, but they are. Remember that it WILL get easier over time and you can absolutely reach those goals you set for yourself. Right now, it's all new and confusing and frankly most of us worry this is how life will be forever. It's not. You will make it past this, just like the rest of us did.

As always, @Arabesque is spot on.
I see that you are are only a few days post-surgery, so the one thing I'd add is that everything you're feeling is 100% NORMAL at this point. We all start second-guessing our decision early on because having WLS is HARD! How you eat, how you feel and how you look is radically changing every day. It's physically and emotionally challenging. The good news is it gets easier as you progress.
I told my wife she only had one job post-surgery. When (not if), I started doubting my decision, she needed to remind me of all the reasons I decided to have the surgery in the first place. I tell you this because I feel like you may need a similar reminder right now. You know your own reasons for taking this journey.
It's easy at this point to think the challenges you're going through are not worth the hoped for end goal, but they are. Remember that it WILL get easier over time and you can absolutely reach those goals you set for yourself. Right now, it's all new and confusing and frankly most of us worry this is how life will be forever. It's not. You will make it past this, just like the rest of us did.

As always, @Arabesque is spot on.
I see that you are are only a few days post-surgery, so the one thing I'd add is that everything you're feeling is 100% NORMAL at this point. We all start second-guessing our decision early on because having WLS is HARD! How you eat, how you feel and how you look is radically changing every day. It's physically and emotionally challenging. The good news is it gets easier as you progress.
I told my wife she only had one job post-surgery. When (not if), I started doubting my decision, she needed to remind me of all the reasons I decided to have the surgery in the first place. I tell you this because I feel like you may need a similar reminder right now. You know your own reasons for taking this journey.
It's easy at this point to think the challenges you're going through are not worth the hoped for end goal, but they are. Remember that it WILL get easier over time and you can absolutely reach those goals you set for yourself. Right now, it's all new and confusing and frankly most of us worry this is how life will be forever. It's not. You will make it past this, just like the rest of us did.

I hate that "it's taking the easy way out" line. There's nothing easy about this. Plus, why in the world would that even matter? It's like some people think if we use a tool like surgery, we didn't pay our "penance" for being fat.
"Nope, sorry, you're not worthy of being healthy, because you cheated your way to health. Do it the right way or not at all"
Really?
I sympathize with the position you're in as my wife was and still is very anti weight-loss surgery. Her line was always why would you permanently alter your anatomy when it's possible to do this without making so drastic a change? My response is I never had a problem losing weight, what I always struggled with was maintaining. After way too many yo-yo diets, I needed to do something else. Dieting alone was not working for me. I needed a better tool.
That's what it is, by the way, a tool. The analogy I like to use is that WLS is like a shovel. I know that sounds odd, but bear with me...
I've dug quite a number of holes on my property to plant trees. Most of those trees will be here longer than I will, but It's still worth it to plant them. I suppose technically I could have tried to dig those holes with my hands but wow, that would have been a challenge and I'm not sure I would have been able to finish the job.
With a shovel, it became doable. The shovel still was a lot of work, but it made an almost impossible job, possible. No one thinks using a shovel is "cheating", we just think of it as a better tool.
At the end of the day, the risk of early death for me was extremely high with cardiac issues, diabetes, liver and kidney problems, etc. I began to feel that I was living on borrowed time. WLS for me was life-changing and life saving. It immediately reversed my diabetes and high-blood pressure. I used the tool because I had reached the point where all I saw in front of me was an early death.
For what it's worth, it would also seem that the medical community takes your side here based on the available medical evidence:
https://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/442260-after-30-years-new-guidelines-for-weight-loss-surgery/
Best of luck whatever you decide.

This is a fantastic point!
The surgery is just a tool, and plenty of people have surgery and fail. Those that are successful have made fundamental changes to the way they eat.
OP: either way, if you want to be successful with or without surgery, you'll need to change your relationship with food. For you at your low BMI, that may be enough even without surgery.

Can you better explain what you mean by "help me"? Do you need to lose weight? How much? When you say you eat very little, do you know how many calories you're consuming now? Do you know your Resting Metabolic Rate? Do you exercise? What types and how much? Do you have any other medical conditions other than your digestive disorder? Especially disorders that impact your metabolism such as PCOS, Hypothyroidism, Diabetes, etc?
Sorry for all the questions, but details matter.

Reposting something I posted elsewhere:
First, the most common reason for any stall, including the dreaded 3-week stall is simply that you are retaining more Water. There are a few reasons this happens, but around the 3-week mark it comes down to the fact that your body is adjusting to a low carb intake after converting from glycogen to ketones for energy. More Water is needed to burn glycogen, so you were retaining more water pre-surgery than you are now that you're using primarily ketones for energy. At about the 3-week mark, your body eventually recognizes that the water loss is long term, so other mechanisms have started kicking in to start holding on to more water. This water loss due to the change between glycogen and ketones is the primary reason for "keto flu", and something that increases your risk of dehydration early after surgery.
The other "reasons" for plateaus really don't apply as much at the 3 week mark, but will become more important later in the process. Let's cover those too though so you're prepared:
As you lose more weight, your overall metabolic rate will slow down. People sometimes think fat is not metabolically active, but that's not true. Less fat means your metabolism slows down, even if you retain the same amount of muscle. As you lose weight, it takes less effort to move, so the amount of calories you burn from activity also drops quite a bit. As you progress, you'll be able to eat more and especially if you're not tracking intake closely by weighing and measuring your food, you can easily be eating a lot more than you think. This one may be TMI for some, but you may simply be retaining more stool. This is going to be hard for some people to hear, but I can tell you one thing it's not, and that's hormones. Yes, various hormonal processes negatively impact weight loss in a myriad of ways, but they don't overcome basic physics: if you eat less than you are burning, you'll lose weight. What these hormones can do if they're out of whack, is not good things like slowing your metabolism, increasing your hunger, screwing with water weight, or even fooling you into thinking you're eating less than you are.
So, with all that sciency stuff out of the way, what do we actually do if we're in a stall? Well, I think it depends on when it happens and how long it lasts:
If it's early (a.k.a. the 3-week stall), just keep doing what you're doing and you should be fine. I know people don't like that advice, but as I said, it's just water, so don't worry about it. Later on, especially if the stall is lasting longer than 2-3 weeks. that's when I think it's important that you look closely at what you are actually burning, as well as really tracking what you are eating. If you don't know your BMR (Basal Metabolic Rate), you should. The closer you are to goal, the harder it is to get the balance right between intake and output to make sure you're not eating too much, so fixing this starts with knowing your BMR and accurate food logging. There's a lot of anecdotal advice thrown around about "ways to break a stall", but there seems to be little scientific evidence for any of it. Most of it certainly won't hurt to try, e.g. breaking up your routine in terms of diet or exercise, but just understand that this change may or may not have had any impact. If it makes you feel better to be proactive, go for it. Longer term, there is one piece of solid advice that's backed up by lots of research: Even if you don't really like working out, do it anyway. Those WLS patients that make a regular habit of exercising for 45 minutes to an hour most days a week are significantly more likely to reach their goal and maintain the weight loss. (One caveat here: significantly changing your exercise routine can make you retain water and possibly even add muscle, so don't freak out if you see a stall or even a gain.) I'll take that exercise advice one step further and say you really should be doing some form of strength training. This is also backed up by lots of studies, but the great thing about strength training is that it makes your burn more calories even at rest (in other words, it increases your metabolic rate). There are lots of other benefits, but the metabolic benefit is the most germaine to the stall question. Those that do strength training are less likely to stall during weight loss.

This made me think about my own decision not to share my surgery with anyone that didn't have a "need to know". Virtually everyone I work with has never actually seen me in person, only via zoom, since we almost all work remotely. I didn't tell anyone, even my boss that I was having weight loss surgery.
Quarterly, my larger team (50-60 folks) gets together in person now, but I've put off traveling for these meetings for most of the year. I used my significant hearing loss as the main rationale. I do have a significant challenge hearing in crowded rooms due to my hearing loss, so it's absolutely an issue. If I'm honest with myself though, I put off going mostly because I was ashamed of my weight. I also knew that after surgery, I'd be closer to a "normal" weight and while some might notice a difference between "video" me and "in person" me, I figured it won't be nearly as noticeable for most folks. Anyway, mid-December, I'm finally planning to go to the quarterly get together.
Fair or not, I know 2 things are true, and I made the choices I did based on this:
Being obese carries a significant stigma that we are lazy, have no self-control, are morally bankrupt, are unattractive, etc. I've seen and felt this personally and its impact on promotions and work assignments. No one will ever admit to feeling this way or letting it impact business decisions, but it happens consciously or not. (I digress here a bit, but if you doubt this is real, look at the C-suite in any major corporation and one consistent theme is that it's exceptionally rare to see someone that's even overweight, much less obese.) Many people think that WLS is the easy way out, so don't associate weight lost this way as "redeeming ourselves" for the laziness and lack of self-control. In effect, only if you lose weight "naturally", are you proven "worthy" again. Frankly it sucks that these attitudes are so prevalent, but they are. I made the choices I did because I don't need anyone at work judging me or my motivations. As someone else said, I did this to save my life. We should be celebrating it. Instead, it's just more stigmatizing.

Current recommendations vary a bit, but most suggest that to lose weight and prevent re-gain, 250 to 300 minutes of moderate physical activity per week are needed. Of that, at least 150 to 180 should be aerobic activities such as brisk walking, running, swimming or bicycling.
Moderate by the way, is defined as attaining a heart rate of 50-70% of your max heart rate. The easiest way to estimate you maximum heart rate is to subtract your age from 220. For example, if you are 50, your max heart rate would be 170, so 50% to 70% of that would be 85 to 119 BPM.
In addition to the aerobic activities, strength training should be included. The recommendation would be to perform 2-3 sessions per week for 30-60 minutes. Detailed recommendations are beyond the scope of what I can add here. For beginners, bodyweight training would be my recommendation. Doing so you'll be at a much lower risk of injury and IMO, bodyweight training should be the foundation of all other strength training. Google "bodyweight training for beginners" and you should see some recommendations. Just make sure the website is from a reputable source. there are lots of "fads" out there and some of them could be harmful.
The reason strength training is so critical is that muscle is significantly more metabolically active than fat. By gaining muscle, you'll actually increase your overall metabolic rate, meaning you'll burn more calories even when you're not exercising. This means you'll be better able to lose weight or maintain weight at a higher overall number of calories than you would otherwise.
In addition, strength training can help you age gracefully by reducing the risk of osteoporosis, improving mental acuity, improving balance and physical functioning, and helping manage pain.
Finally, in addition to the aerobic and strength training recommendation, I also think it's a good idea to participate in functional fitness that helps improve balance, coordination, and flexibility. There are lots of options here, but yoga and tai chi are good choices if you need recommendations.