ElusiveQuality

Jeter,

This is coming from someone who is ADHD (not diagnosed until I was 46 and it helped drive me to alcoholism) and banded.

Starting off, your sister has the problems, not you. I have no idea where all of this stems from but she's worrying too much about your life, not her own. You are taking care of your business and trying to make things as good as you can for yourself, your daughter and your mom. Your sister is mad and confused about some part of her life and is trying to blame you. Do you best not to just keep on living your life to your standards and expectations. Your sister's opinions and valuations of you should have absolutely no bearing on what you do.

As for ADHD, medications can help in some situations but they don't work by themselves. You need to start working with your daughter on how to cope with ADHD. There are tons of books out there that can help (Hartman has written several that are OK, plus "you mean I'm not lazy, crazy or stupid?" book is good). You are fortunate that your daughter was diagnosed so early in life. There are habits she needs to start developing now to cope that will help her for the rest of her life. I wish my parents knew about this when I was 8 years old. ADHD is a blessing in addition to a curse. There are parts of the ADHD mind that really help with creativity and problem solving. Learn about the ADHD mind and you'll find ways to really improve your daughter's life.

Back to your sister. You may want to examine her drinking habits and medication use. From your description, her behaviour is not rational.

Good Luck.

EQ

Mine took about 4 months. The group I went with intentionlly slow rolls the process to make sure you're ready mentally for the surgery and want to do it, not just a desparate grab at a solution. I didn't need to do any supervised dieting, the process was just that slow.

I started off with the informational seminar then set up an appointment with a doctor (2 week wait). Got his approval and then had to do psych, pulmo, diet, etc. All set up by me and nothing had a quick lead time. After that, I had to wait for formal insurance approval (3 wk) then I got to do the ultra-sound, blood work, ekg, etc. Once all that was cleared I got a surgery date a month out.

I started out in late March and got banded on July 18. Your experience will likely differ.

Julie,

Can you and your parents visit some Al-Anon meetings to learn about enabling alcholics? If he's un-employed, where is he getting the money to buy booze?

Your parents are probably living in as much fear as your brother but don't know what to do. In Al-Anon, there are parents that have lived through the same problem and can work with your parents to learn how to better handle the situation.

Welcome to Al-Anon and Alateen

Please PM if you'd like to chat.

Good Luck.

I'm doing fine on liquids and Proteins. The two things that work for me are:

1) Isopure Peach-Mango flavored drink. 20oz of liquid plus 40 grams of Protein. I drink a half of one 2x/day over crushed ice and it tastes just like orange Gatorade.

2) EAS low-carb chocolate Protein Powder. Blend with 2oz crushed ice, 4oz milk and 2oz half and half and it comes remarkably close to a milkshake.

Unbelievable. I got banded Friday and left the hospital 24 hours after waking. They wanted me to stay the night because of my apnea but I never would have lasted at home. Came home today and I'm totally crapped out. Gas pains are the worst.

FFL writes:

I am not looking for sympathy but understanding. I would really like to get this back under control. How did you get sober? Is there a chance for me if I'm serious again? Fit for Life.

For me sobriety came from having something to live for (my wife and son) and total surrender and acceptance of the problem. Went to rehab and learned about the disease. Went to therapy and learned my root causes for drinking (learned about ADD 40 years too late). Joined AA for the fellowship and support. Got a sponsor. Worked the steps to learn about myself and correct my life. I'll be banded just one week short of my one year anniversary or sobriety.

What is important is that you do what you need to do. If you need help, don't wait for somebody to get back from vacation.

PM if you'd like to talk.<!-- / message -->

Well, since you're already banded I'll happily buy you a coke as long as I get to watch you pound it down.:embaressed_smile:

Anyhow, I've been sampling the liquid Proteins for about a week now prior to surgery and the nasty after-taste doesn't affect me anymore. I don't really notice it as much as before. I used to have to fire a shot down and then hit a chaser of black coffee. Now, I just dilute the milkshake drinks a little and can handle the Isopure with no problem. I bought a case of the Mango-Peach isopure and plan to be hitting them hard after the surgery. Like Fenton said, 20oz Fluid and 40g Protein. Good combo.

ISO-PURE drinks are good if you find the right flavor. You need to drink one or two to get used to the finish, but after a while it became just like a Gatorade to me.

Updated the list for my surgery on the 18th.

1 wsw27

1 tillydog

1 doedoe1961

1 staylucid

1 mygirlayanna

1 Rdk211

1 kiwifruit_77511

2 minidriver

2 slim2be

2 BethO

2 mrsgriffin2u

2 trudeip

2 Barbiek

2 annabella

2 SanDiegoSusan

2 anita reyna

2 jjenkins2411

3 BigBander

3 scoutmama

3 2GoodDogs

3 kimlam

4 joiful

7 slim1

7 ginnyc

7 AmyWA

7 Redheada

8 blaze 21

8 Louisville Lesa

8 zeama

8 cinda

8 flowers

8 JaJeanne

8 Booklady

8 IntoLess

9 Ailie

9 Sarv

9 MarylandMommy

9 siouxsie Sioux

9 Rivieramaya05

9 lalaredd

9 missrach

9 aliNSanDiego

10 sallen21

10 Goobe

10 2Blite4life

10 melmel

10 Fancy Nancy

10 vannie

11 Applebottom

11 vra123456

11 wstone

11 falloons

11 melallot

13 OvrLvl

14 MaidMarion

14 Chellets

14 pbpunisher

15 Fearless55

15 Flowerpurr

15 lynlynkr

15 pschmolle

15 perfectforme

15 PENTURN

15 mellimel71

15 Melody2006

16 eyespy

16 lisainbohemia

16 lotzasunshine

16 SciTeach

16 lynlynkr

16 michkor

16 jomomma

16 Charlene K

16 nanaislosingit

16 moez02

16 aclubb

17 OCBreeze4U

17 3m’smom

17 tnag86

17 Long2bFree

18 PDXBandster

18 toogoode4u

18 CapitolChick

18 ElusiveQuality

21 clayverde

21 just1more

22 Moocatschade

22 zillyanne

22 TeriVA

22 kimaly

22 lleighton5

22 Choromom

22 annesan

22 thatDEgirl

22 Laniev00

23 BABOOMER

23 shellbell99

24 daniml

24 nyllrap

24 linksmom

24 lisadental

24 Frypan

24 Diva21

25 NewJEM

25 Kiki220

25 Nachtigall

28 ann71

28 splfrd

28 mamanmidwife

29 Cherub

29 Chellets

30 orea15