Sleeve_Me_Alone

The primary functions are 1) to allow time for your surgical wounds to heal (this was MAJOR surgery, you don't want to push it) 2) to slowly integrate foods to prevent sickness/overeating 3) to allow time for you to learn your new body and adjust to your new eating habits. That being said. every surgeon has their own pre- and post- op diet requirements and there is no use comparing one to another. The ASMBS does not have hard and fast recommendations on the food plans, so surgeons are left to devise their own and they can vary wildly. Mine were both extremely restrictive, with the pre-op lasting 2 weeks and post-op being 8 weeks.
Regarding the WHY of what you can/can't eat and when, reach out to your nutritionist and see if they can provide some insight on what they recommend what they do. We could all speculate, but ultimately, that guidance is coming from your team an thus the justification should as well.

Do the INTERNAL work first, and don't stop. Counseling, books, support groups. Do whatever you need to so that you are in a healthy place mentally and emotionally BEFORE surgery and then keep going because you WILL need it after. I did a ton of work before surgery and felt like I was in a really good place, but I didn't keep up with most of it post-op and really struggled for a while. The hormonal changes, body changes, and lifestyle changes all add up and suddenly I didn't recognize myself or my life anymore. this is a lifelong process, you will be a WLS patient for the rest of your life, and making sure you are taking care of your WHOLE self is so, so important.

You need to get into some counseling ASAP. If you truly feel this way, it is alarming and needs to be addressed. Post-op mental and emotional difficulty is completely NORMAL. Suicidal ideation, self hate, and romanticizing your own misery is not. Its very clear that you are not upset about the surgery, but rather that there is something else much deeper going on. I hope you hear me when I say, struggling post-op is NORMAL, but getting the help you need is the only way forward. Please, please reach out.

Do the INTERNAL work first, and don't stop. Counseling, books, support groups. Do whatever you need to so that you are in a healthy place mentally and emotionally BEFORE surgery and then keep going because you WILL need it after. I did a ton of work before surgery and felt like I was in a really good place, but I didn't keep up with most of it post-op and really struggled for a while. The hormonal changes, body changes, and lifestyle changes all add up and suddenly I didn't recognize myself or my life anymore. this is a lifelong process, you will be a WLS patient for the rest of your life, and making sure you are taking care of your WHOLE self is so, so important.

I would highly recommend counseling for sure. Getting professional help in managing those feelings, learning new coping skills, and addressing the underlying stuff that is driving those feelings and behaviors is life change, hard, necessary work. The surgery can only get you so far, it is just a tool. The more tools you have, the better.
I would also suggest a support program, something with REAL people that you can interact with (this is just a message board, its pretty one-sided). Personally, I am a member of BariNation and LOVE it. It has been a game changer for me. But there are tons of other options out there. Your surgery center might even have support groups. Regardless of what/where, it can be incredibly beneficial to have support in a group setting with real people.

Do the INTERNAL work first, and don't stop. Counseling, books, support groups. Do whatever you need to so that you are in a healthy place mentally and emotionally BEFORE surgery and then keep going because you WILL need it after. I did a ton of work before surgery and felt like I was in a really good place, but I didn't keep up with most of it post-op and really struggled for a while. The hormonal changes, body changes, and lifestyle changes all add up and suddenly I didn't recognize myself or my life anymore. this is a lifelong process, you will be a WLS patient for the rest of your life, and making sure you are taking care of your WHOLE self is so, so important.

I would highly recommend counseling for sure. Getting professional help in managing those feelings, learning new coping skills, and addressing the underlying stuff that is driving those feelings and behaviors is life change, hard, necessary work. The surgery can only get you so far, it is just a tool. The more tools you have, the better.
I would also suggest a support program, something with REAL people that you can interact with (this is just a message board, its pretty one-sided). Personally, I am a member of BariNation and LOVE it. It has been a game changer for me. But there are tons of other options out there. Your surgery center might even have support groups. Regardless of what/where, it can be incredibly beneficial to have support in a group setting with real people.

I literally just stopped by to tell you that you are beautiful! Your eyes are mesmerizing!
I hope you find the help you seek.

I agree with finding a support group and therapist. It can be very hard to find a bariatric therapist, but check with your surgery center, they should have someone, but they might be booked out quite a ways.
There is T.R.I.B.E, but I don't know too much about it. If you're on instagram it's "the sleeved dietician" and her group. There are also some good podcasts like "Our Sleeved Life Podcast" and Bariatric Nutrition with Dr. Susan Mitchell (Dr. Susan Mitchell has a Facebook group that is nice).
Good luck!

I would highly recommend counseling for sure. Getting professional help in managing those feelings, learning new coping skills, and addressing the underlying stuff that is driving those feelings and behaviors is life change, hard, necessary work. The surgery can only get you so far, it is just a tool. The more tools you have, the better.
I would also suggest a support program, something with REAL people that you can interact with (this is just a message board, its pretty one-sided). Personally, I am a member of BariNation and LOVE it. It has been a game changer for me. But there are tons of other options out there. Your surgery center might even have support groups. Regardless of what/where, it can be incredibly beneficial to have support in a group setting with real people.

Absolutely. That feeling of not recognizing yourself and your life anymore can be hugely disorienting, and can lead to really unhealthy coping mechanisms if you don't address it.

Do the INTERNAL work first, and don't stop. Counseling, books, support groups. Do whatever you need to so that you are in a healthy place mentally and emotionally BEFORE surgery and then keep going because you WILL need it after. I did a ton of work before surgery and felt like I was in a really good place, but I didn't keep up with most of it post-op and really struggled for a while. The hormonal changes, body changes, and lifestyle changes all add up and suddenly I didn't recognize myself or my life anymore. this is a lifelong process, you will be a WLS patient for the rest of your life, and making sure you are taking care of your WHOLE self is so, so important.

I'm with some of the others, the SF stuff just doesn't do it for me. They taste off, leave me wanting, and are generally full of all sorts of bizarre ingredients that make them less food and more science experiment. I have learned to Portion Control the "regular" stuff and fully enjoy it. If I am eating 100g of pulled pork for instance, I really only need a very small amount of BBQ Sauce to get the flavor I want and to be satisfied. So I might as well go for the good stuff, in appropriate amounts, and fully enjoy it vs. using more of the replacement and walk away still wanting more.
All that being said, seems to me that G Huges is a fan favorite. That's what I've seen most frequently recommended in bariatric circles.

I'm with some of the others, the SF stuff just doesn't do it for me. They taste off, leave me wanting, and are generally full of all sorts of bizarre ingredients that make them less food and more science experiment. I have learned to Portion Control the "regular" stuff and fully enjoy it. If I am eating 100g of pulled pork for instance, I really only need a very small amount of BBQ Sauce to get the flavor I want and to be satisfied. So I might as well go for the good stuff, in appropriate amounts, and fully enjoy it vs. using more of the replacement and walk away still wanting more.
All that being said, seems to me that G Huges is a fan favorite. That's what I've seen most frequently recommended in bariatric circles.

I'm ~10 months. I don't use Portion Control plates or containers, but I do frequently weigh/measure foods. Not always, maybe 50% of the time. It helps keep me accountable and helps me understand my own hunger & full queues, eating habits, etc. I typically will only portion out what I think I will/can eat. If I eat it all and feel like I need a little more, then so be it. But that is rarely the case. My husband has become a garbage disposal for my onsie-twosie left over bites. I do however still track EVERYTHING I eat. I know myself, and this is what works for me, though I know a lot of folks do not track. At this point, I could probably eat a whole bagel, but it would very likely upset my stomach. I've never dumped, but if I eat a carb heavy meal, especially one with very little Protein, I get nauseous and often develop the dreaded foamies. With something like that, something considered a "slider food" its very easy to eat around your restriction. If you are mindlessly munching on it one bite at a time, its going to pass more quickly than something with lots of protein & Fiber, so you'll be able to keep eating a bite at a time without ever really feeling full. Remember, restriction is different for everyone and can even vary from day to day. The surgery is just a tool, but with enough work (or not enough, as the case may be), you can absolutely circumvent it. All that being said, it was just one meal. Now you know to be more mindful going forward. Use it as a helpful bit of data and move on.

I'm ~10 months. I don't use Portion Control plates or containers, but I do frequently weigh/measure foods. Not always, maybe 50% of the time. It helps keep me accountable and helps me understand my own hunger & full queues, eating habits, etc. I typically will only portion out what I think I will/can eat. If I eat it all and feel like I need a little more, then so be it. But that is rarely the case. My husband has become a garbage disposal for my onsie-twosie left over bites. I do however still track EVERYTHING I eat. I know myself, and this is what works for me, though I know a lot of folks do not track. At this point, I could probably eat a whole bagel, but it would very likely upset my stomach. I've never dumped, but if I eat a carb heavy meal, especially one with very little Protein, I get nauseous and often develop the dreaded foamies. With something like that, something considered a "slider food" its very easy to eat around your restriction. If you are mindlessly munching on it one bite at a time, its going to pass more quickly than something with lots of protein & Fiber, so you'll be able to keep eating a bite at a time without ever really feeling full. Remember, restriction is different for everyone and can even vary from day to day. The surgery is just a tool, but with enough work (or not enough, as the case may be), you can absolutely circumvent it. All that being said, it was just one meal. Now you know to be more mindful going forward. Use it as a helpful bit of data and move on.

Yep, the first couple of weeks I was completely exhausted and had to take naps every day. Once I moved to purees and was able to get closer to my Protein goal it started to get better. Give yourself lots of grace and hang in there!

@KimA-GA yep, I totally get it. I had the tools, I just wasn't ready to really use them until suddenly I was. It sounds like you are in a great headspace and on the right track! Best of luck, we will be here cheering you on!

I had RNY on 12/31/2019. Since then I've lost over half my body weight. I've focused on exercise and building strength and stamina. And in June, I went to Tanzania where I successfully summited Kilimanjaro on June 24th. I truly believe the surgery made this possible. I just wanted to share with others who may understand.
Next up is plastics and then I need to figure out my next big challenge. Any suggestions?
Lori

Thank you! I have done lots of therapy over the years but not doing it formally at present. Honesty I am using the tools I learned from it but didn’t help me at the time. I wasn’t ready before. I was trying to survive some very difficult circumstances for me. I am finally out of the survival mode and trying to implement changes to actually live… guess life begins after 40!

That is amazing!! You are absolutely on the right track - the mental and emotional pieces require FAR more work than the physical. And, as wonderful as WLS is, it is just a tool and do the internal work needed to be successful. I did a lot of similar work, and I chose to get therapy. For me, my anxiety, depression, and past trauma play a HUGE role in my disordered eating and I knew that I could do much of the work on my own to establish good habits but I would need support getting to the root of some of it. If you're not already, I strongly suggest getting into counseling of some kind. We can all use all the tools we can get!

Greetings!
I just had my first surgical consult and am working my way toward an October 2022 surgery. I want this to truly be a success, so before a knife touches me I want to get in a better place in my own head and face some of the things which got me to this state of super morbid obesity.
Over the past few months I have worked hard to work on my issues with food. I have issues with emotional and binge eating, eating too much fast food, too much processed food and too much sugar.
I have used a lot of techniques. Always shifting to try to beat take care of me. Some things I have done include mental health journaling, making no foods “bad” or off limits, practicing mindfulness and self forgiveness, using pre-packaged/portioned grab and go foods (nuts and cheese snack packs, lunchables, apples and Peanut Butter etc), slowly reducing my fast food dependence.

it has been rewarding so far to tackle those issues. I have lost 50 lbs so far. Sept 2021 I was 452 lbs, in pain and miserable in my own body. I now am 398, in and less discomfort. I am looking forward to being in the right mindset for surgery so that I can ultimately achieve all of my goals and change my life.
What is your experiences with dealing with food issues both before and after surgery??

I am still losing, but already have a good bit of lose skin/squish. I will tell you without reservation, that I would rather have a little extra skin jiggle than be fat and miserable and unhealthy and on the fast track to early death. Do I wish things were super toned and tight? Sure, don't we all? But the reality is, I've carried around over 100lbs of extra weight my entire adult life, I'm not ever going to have the body of a person who was always thin. But what I do have is my life back, a healthy relationship with food, a body that I've learned to love and be grateful for, and YEARS of my life given back. For me, the skin is a reminder of how far I've come and what I've done for myself as an act of love.
I would suggest to anyone considering surgery, that they focus on their mental and emotional health first and foremost. You have to be in a good place INSIDE before you are ready to make the OUTSIDE changes. Truly, this is a life long journey and you will only be as successful as you're willing to be, which starts with the head work. I think having done a ton of therapy and getting myself into a good headspace before surgery is what has allowed me to accept the less desirable parts of the process and not get hung up.

I use a cold brew concentrate, a little fat free half and half, and a splash of sugar free Syrup (Torani, Jordan's, etc.). I make my hot coffee the same way. I get the syrups at Home Goods or TJMaxx, as they tend to be cheapest there, but you can also find them in grocery stores and online.
My plan restricted caffeine until 2 weeks post-op, which is the only time in my life I've ever drank Decaf.

I am still losing, but already have a good bit of lose skin/squish. I will tell you without reservation, that I would rather have a little extra skin jiggle than be fat and miserable and unhealthy and on the fast track to early death. Do I wish things were super toned and tight? Sure, don't we all? But the reality is, I've carried around over 100lbs of extra weight my entire adult life, I'm not ever going to have the body of a person who was always thin. But what I do have is my life back, a healthy relationship with food, a body that I've learned to love and be grateful for, and YEARS of my life given back. For me, the skin is a reminder of how far I've come and what I've done for myself as an act of love.
I would suggest to anyone considering surgery, that they focus on their mental and emotional health first and foremost. You have to be in a good place INSIDE before you are ready to make the OUTSIDE changes. Truly, this is a life long journey and you will only be as successful as you're willing to be, which starts with the head work. I think having done a ton of therapy and getting myself into a good headspace before surgery is what has allowed me to accept the less desirable parts of the process and not get hung up.