Lahela

True, if the OP can get over the bothersome thoughts and be at peace, then that would be ideal....but if this is going to fester, all she would be doing is postponing a potentially even bigger argument later.
Depends on if/when you want to deal.
Edited to add: sorry OP, don't mean to discuss you as a third person ❤️

My suggestion would be to have a chat with your husband. It doesn't have to be an argument. Just a conversation.
❤️

My dad always told me that when you cant stop dwelling on what people say about you, you are letting them live rent free in your head. Well...there was a comment made on Sunday that I cant seem to evict!
My husband and I were visiting my inlaws in another state. We attended the church where my FIL is a preacher. We always attend church with them when we visit. Last visit we made was 2 weeks post op, so I had not lost really anything at that point. This was the first time the people at the church have seen me since my extreme weight loss. A lot of people made comments about how great I looked, and that didnt bother me at all. However, two ladies came up to my husband and I, told me I looked so good, then they turned to my husband and said, "looks like you really made out on that deal!" My husband laughed and said, "Yeah my investment really paid off!" For background, we got married two months before my surgery.
I tried to laugh it off in the moment, but I really had to bite back tears. I have never felt that my husband looked at me any differently at 284 or 140. He himself has said that he only saw me, never my weight. He says he loves me regardless.
Both comments, from the lady AND my husband's reply has been on repeat in my head all week. Who finds that comment appropriate to say to anyone?? I was a catch at my HW and I am no more or less of a catch at my CW. He didnt marry me hoping I would lose weight and look better physically, at least I would certainly HOPE not, seeing as he is overweight himself.
It was inappropriate and hurtful. Normally, I would address my husbands comment with him in private. However, our marriage has been rough (to say the least) lately and I didnt want to start an argument. I know he will tell me that it was a joke, I am being too sensitive and overthinking it. Which...maybe I am but that doesnt make the comments hurt less.
I dont know...I guess i just needed to vent to people that would understand!

Ugh I’m struggling with the same thing. Had RNY on March 25th. And I’m doing great on liquids I just want to put something in my mouth to chew on! It’s killing me. I still have 7 days left 😭😭

The first 3 weeks post op were definitely the hardest for me. I hated all the Protein Shakes because my taste changed, and I was dying for something savory.
Getting to purees was so great.
I spent the whole time looking for recipes and it helped get me through.

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It's a hard period of adjustment for sure! But don't forget that you committed to this tough part. You need to follow through, follow instructions and stay safe. If you bust a stomach incision it can be life threatening and will result in a brutally long hospitalization and a much LONGER liquid diet! If you totally lose your mind and eat something....never skip ahead more than one stage. Maybe your doctor can clear you for something like blended cream Soup or thin hot Cereal? It can't hurt to let your provider know what a tough time you're having and see if they can help. Was a tough stretch for me, too. Hang in there! Best wishes!

I’m one week and a day Post-op and told I had a mental breakdown because I physically sick of this liquid diet. It’s like food is everywhere ,Facebook, Instagram, TV. And my body just craves it all at this point. Did anyone else feel the same way?

Yes. I am soooo sick of the liquid diet. I have one week left, but I am really considering cheating, which is very unlike me.

I had two weeks pre-op liquid and tomorrow will make two weeks post-op liquid. Other programs allow purée and I’m dying for any type of real food!!! All I’ve had is Gatorade, Protein Drinks, and clear broth. I dont even like Gatorade.

I asked the doctor if I could start soft foods a week early and was told no. Trying to convince my husband to make me 1 scrambled egg or ricotta bake, but he won’t. I’m cranky,

Hang in there I’m now 6 weeks and 5 days out and things are way better. You are stronger than you think, keep pushing

I have only been doing some very light walking. On my follow up this week which was five weeks they said I could start doing some weights. And just walk 30 minutes a day. Within the first two weeks I tried to walk and I would literally have to stop because I would get a sharp pain in my left flank abdomen that would bring me to my knees. It was my body telling me to chill out I was doing too much!! 😄 That pain disappeared by week three and I’ve been fine ever since

I walked pretty slowly - but that's due to my starting weight and the fact I have moderate arthritis in my right hip, so it was painful to walk at that weight. My clinic didn't specify if we had to walk slowly or moderately, so I'm guessing moderately is fine as long as you're up for it and it's not causing any pain.

Being patient with myself is my biggest obstacle right now. I’m 8 weeks out and expect to be an expert and expect my old habits to not come up. Good thing I’m seeing a food disorder therapist 😉

I haven’t caved in, it’s just the mental Anguish of not having real food in almost a month and I wanted to know if I wasn’t alone. I asked because my Bestfriend tried to tell me it because I’m have a relationship with food and it’s in my head. Which made me feel like I’m just greedy. But I have 4 days left until I move on to Purée foods and I can’t wait

I'm 3 days post op & already looking up meals. You are not alone!

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I'm in the same boat. Hang in there! I wanted to cheat today, but I had to push through the urges.
You're strong, and you got this!

Trust me, you will look back at this time and wonder what you were worried about. 7 weeks post op and I am struggling to feel good after solid foods!

Worst two weeks for me were post op liquid. I didn't cheat, but I wanted to. Hang in there. The coming months will be great.

P.S. walking: I started that the first week. I had to wait four weeks for most other exercises - and I think eight weeks for weights.

it usually takes up to a week for the first BM after surgery (after all, there's not much in there - plus it can take a few days for your system to "wake up" after anesthesia), so that's very common. And just a forewarning - that first one can be a doozy - so the milk of magnesia (or similar treatment - some of us took stool softeners) is probably a good idea.
most people do gain weight from the IV fluids they give you in the hospital (some people gain 10 or more lbs from it), and that can also take up to a week to work it's way out of your system. Just stay off the scale if you have to. It's all just Water - not true weight.
I think the above poster may be right that the fogginess and irritability may just be lingering effects from the anesthesia. Also, some women experience mood swings and a screwed up menstrual cycle the first few weeks after surgery, due to rapid changes in hormone levels, so there might be some of that going on, too. Just hang on - this is all temporary.
Buyer's remorse is common the first couple of weeks - I had it as well - but just hold tight. I think you'll be feeling a lot better about things in another week or two...

You're not failing. They pump you full of Fluid because you might struggle with dehydration. Swelling is an issue. Your body is reacting to surgery. Whole bunch of weird reasons why the scale is being....the scale. LOL.
Stay off the scale and work really hard at all of your little goals. Getting your fluids in. Drinking enough protien shake. Taking walks. You can do something about those thing....concentrate on what is within your power.
If you had a presurg liquid diet....chances are pretty good there's not that much to poop out. Walking helps Constipation. Drinking Water helps.
If your sugar and hormones are all whackadoo...which they likely are after surgery....you might feel kinda unhinged and weird. I feel like a loon when I'm in ketosis...can't think well...brain fog so bad I'm scared to drive...so I feel ya. It'll get better.

1) I think the answer to your (TEMPORARY!!!!) struggles is anesthesia. It takes AT LEAST one week to recover from its after-effects, and longer for most!
2) It is also really, really common to have these "why did I do this????" thoughts!! I was prepared for this when I had an elective surgery several years ago. The surgeon gave us a packet that went into this issue at length and it is all temporary, I 100% promise you!!!! You are EXHAUSTED right now!! Your body is recuperating!!
As you probably have in read many, many posts in here on BP, the chorus line is "WHYYYYYYY didn't I do this earlier???" You have given yourself a tremendous gift - a second chance at health and...vibrancy!! This regret, remorse, what have I done feeling is going to pass!!
3) The 8.5# weight gain is also TEMPORARY. FAKE. WILL BE GONE VERY SOON. Remember that needle stuck on the back of your hand attached to the hat stand-looking thing with bags on it that you had to drag everywhere during your hospital stay (which I am going to gently remind you was only a MERE few days ago, my friend!! Be kind to yourself!!)? Those bags pumped your body with a lot - A LOT - of Fluid. That 'weight' is going to be gone, plus more, VERY VERY SOON!!!
So...I am hoping you find that place of optimism again very soon and please know that you have all of our support, encouragement & sincere wishes for your success and a brand new beginning!! Even if you don't feel it every second of the day during this journey - You've GOT this!!! You really do. xoxo

I'm 5 days post-op. Today I had a setback. Bad gas pain (not the gas from surgery), nausea, can't fit in all my fluids. I'm focusing on the Water and not so much the Protein Shakes because of the nausea. Just a bummer of a day bc I felt like I should feel better by now. AND I have to put my scale away bc I'm not seeing any weight loss. Patience is a virtue I guess.

I completely understand. It’s hard to be patient. I keep asking my husband why I’m not invisible yet (haha).

Had VSG March 22nd.

Ugh! 2 weeks of liquid diet pre-op + 6 days postop now = 0 pounds lost.
what in the world?!!! Is this normal