Lily66

You are an individual.
Take care of yourself.
While I truly appreciate what marriage is supposed to mean (I really do), sometimes it appears some marriages are like cages, which is a difficult situation for people on both sides.
Good Luck 💚

Hello,
I hope you are well. I have been a registered nurse for over 12 years and my Bariatric surgery will be in March. When I was in shape (all of my life except for 5 years ago), I used to think the same thing as your wife. 5 years ago I fell into a depression and gained over 100 pounds. I’ve been trying to get it off ever since. Now, I have high blood pressure, sleep apnea, acid reflux and pre-diabetes. People in my family say I should not do the surgery. They say I can do it on my own. But as I said, I have been trying to lose the weight for 5 years and my health is actively declining. Should I wait until I am fully diabetic so I can meet the approval of my family? No. Obesity is one of the most unhealthy modifiable conditions you can have. Despite how widely accepted it is, it’s worse than smoking, drinking, and quite a few illegal drugs (arguably combined). It damages every organ. Fat puts pressure on your organs, making them secrete hormones that alter your ability think and function properly. I know your wife is concerned about the risks of surgery. But what about living long enough to go to your child’s wedding? What about being able to play with your child in the park? What about setting a healthful example for your child so the cycle does not continue (I come from an obese family so I know how hard it is to break free from bad Family eating habits)? I hope my comment helps.

I week out from RNY. Two weeks of liquid diet and Keto found my ankles but one week after surgery gave me an even bigger blessing!!!

I haven been able to wear this comfortably in about two years. Now I’m scared to wear the dern thing because I’m so used to the silicone bands I’m afraid I’ll ruin it! At least it fits!!!

Yes, it's a lengthy process from start to finish. My insurance approval took two weeks, but I couldn't get the surgery for six weeks because my surgeon's calendar was booked up that far out. I know patience is hard, but it's worth it, so just take a deep breath and enjoy the fact that you've been approved.

I went through a real low mood period post op where i cried a lot and felt very depressed. I thought id never enjoy food again.
My relationship with food is very very different now - things can be too sweet! Never thought THAT was possible, I hate meat, it makes me feel uncomfortable in my stomach and grosses me out. I dont generally enjoy food unless its actually something really really good. And i mentally have to know its healthy too or the joy is all gone.

Head hunger is 100% real and probably the most difficult part - even though i dont necessarily want food, when im bored i just eat. Ive learnt the way to help me say no to things is to think about their taste (weird concept i know!). For example, theres a chocolate cake on the table in the staff room I know what choc cake tastes like... so i dont need to eat it! Works well for me

I agree that the bypass sounds scary, but to me it's not as scary as having 80% of your stomach removed! It's theoretically reversible, and the mortality data for both the sleeve and bypass are comparable. But the risks and mortality of cancer is much higher, so I wouldn't hesitate to revise. It'll likely save your life!

there are slightly more potential complications with the bypass, but complications on either surgery aren't common, and most are minor and easily "fixable". Many of us have never had any complications at all. It was the gold standard for a long time, and there's a ton of long-term research on it. Surgical techniques have improved greatly over the years, so problems they used to have years ago rarely occur anymore. As long as you're diligent about your Vitamins (even moreso than with the sleeve), you'll likely be fine. A lot of people are afraid of it because they move your small intestine - but cutting out 80% of your stomach and throwing it in the trash is pretty radical, too. Since you have acid reflux, I would definitely go for it. Uncontrolled, severe reflux can be VERY dangerous. You're likely dealing with a more dangerous complication now than you would by getting a bypass.