I had RNY (first and only weight loss surgery) in April of 2018. Most days I am happy with my decision. Other days, I'm honestly very unhappy. I lost pretty much all of my hair. Dumping syndrome was absolutely awful for several months. Since surgery, I have multiple bowel movements every day, and all are the most wretched foul smelling BMs in history. And they all feel very urgent. So, now I'm quite limited in what I do and for how long. A four hour boat trip...scary as hell because I'm afraid I will literally poop my pants. A one hour trip in the car, I'm mapping out bathroom breaks in my head. I also have had awful rib,/upper abdominal pain/cramping that is not related to eating. I had an EGD, ultrasound, CT, etc. Everything looked fine. But for months it was debilitating. I am convinced that this is related to my surgery and possibly some ducts being inflamed or irritated. It felt like gallbladder pain, and had my gallbladder removed when I had RNY. Sounds like you know this will not be easy. It's not. Good luck with your decision.