KarenLR75

Okay!
We are having another one tomorrow!
7pm cst, I think

I’d love a heads up for the next one!

I think you may be reading her reply out of context...she was NOT calling someone a snowflake...a few..like 1 or 2 ppl were inferring that some on THIS thread were not looking at reality and maybe were wanting excuses or we wanted to be 'pandered to (my interpretation and mine alone)...she was saying we were not ASKING to be treated like we needed some sort of special care...
Don't know why so many ppl want to take this thread and continue to issue vague insults such as putting support thread in quotes - my apologies directly if that was not your intent though! I also apologize for this frustrated reply when you may just be simply confused about what her post was in response to....
Anyone who does not agree or believe in this thread & the TRUE support& encouragement, tips, advice, etc.. that we are seeking as a group...as ppl who feel correctly or incorrectly that they may be facing some additional challenges...then please take the high road and go elsewhere but let's not let the good stuff that can be helpful to all be overwhelmed by a few ppl's negativity.
Those of us who are looking for the support are open to discussion on what challenges may or may not be in our control We are looking for those who may have had similar challenges and how did they deal with it. We are open to even discussing what roles mental and emotional roadblocks/challenges may play.
We never asked for ppl to 'baby' us. The ONLY strong protest that I'm aware of is when this post denigrated down into insults and name calling. The 'snowflake' was a 'callback' to what ppl on this thread were already called by someone else. She was REFERENCING that..not STARTING it.
I may have very lightly alluded to it a few posts earlier, but the REASON I'd like to see this thread ABANDONED SOME DAY is BECAUSE PPL GET THE HELP THEY NEED HERE or in other places with a great deal of wise veteran support like FluffyChix's "Doing the Headwork" threads and the help that she offered earlier today or with their family/local support/surgeon/nutritionist/doctors, etc.
With HELP and TOOLS and PEOPLE'S INPUT via all of these wonderful ways, I'd LOVE to see this thread abandoned because the ppl who were looking for support - GOT THE SUPPORT and we all were continuing on our successful journeys! I wish that for EVERYONE who has ever posted here whether we have all been in agreement or not, whether we have been upset with each other, whether we have been hurt/wounded...whether someone has decided to block/ignore someone...I would NEVER ever wish anyone less success than i want for myself!
BEST WISHES to EVERYONE on this FORUM!!!!!

I'm in! Thanks for the info Fluffychix & Sheribear68! I need all the help I can get to make the MOST of this journey as possible!
In recent discussions with Fluffy and others, we did the math and my average amount of weight lost per month SINCE surgery is actual a bit over 12 pounds per month and that would actually have been higher if my exercise hadn't taken a nosedive in the past..well, I was thinking it was a week, but it's been more like 10 days.
My INITIAL Months 1-3 weight loss was...when I compared to my siblings was not as large as theirs was so yeah...it bothered me. I tried to be careful (and yeah, we probably shouldn't compare but I did) and only compare with others IF they were in a similar situation to me. i.e. for me that was: female, 50+, menopausal, sedentary, known slow metabolism DUE to hormones, lack of exercise, medications, illness/conditions, 20+ years of yo-yo dieting and/or anything else that contributed to the slowness - some things WITHIN my control, some things NOT.
On some days when I was doing better mentally, I figured well, I may be starting out slower but my rate per month may be more sustainable than theirs after the first few mos. I need to get back on my surgery sibling thread but I ALREADY know now that in looking at my weight loss data over a MORE SUFFICIENT amount of time to evaluate a truer picture of 'weight loss per mo), I'm at least an AVERAGE loser and if I deal with some recent bad habits that crept back in suddenly, I feel that with not a ton of effort I can hit a 'AVERAGE-HIGH' amt of weight loss per mo.
I wanted to post as some of you know I'm very data driven. The first 2 - 3 mos of surgery, including that critical 1st mo where some of us wonder based on SO VERY VERY little calories, why weight loss wasn't higher..it's kinda of like when we were kids...I always used to say when asked..."I'm 5 and 1/2 years old"...because I was PROUD of that '1/2'...and the age I'm at now, man, I round DOWN!!!
When we are little though...at young ages, our time on this earth is so SMALL at that point, that our experiences for the first let's just say..5 yrs...is obviously the BULK of our entire little life at that point. Flash forward to today and being..cough..like around 50...and ages 0-5 is nothing but a BLINK. Statistically barely factors.
I realize now that while yes...my first 2 mos especially I found to be a bit disappointing at the time, in hindsight, just 4 more months out, the math is showing that DESPITE my true challenges and even for me, some emotional/mental ones, I am at least an AVERAGE loser. I'm posting this hoping to give those who are only a couple of months out and may be fighting with disappointment...some hope and another way to consider things..and to stay on track and let the time pass...then look back at what has happened.
My wish for all of us is we become part of..someday...a "We WERE slow losers but look at us now" type of thread..lol. I realize that there are ppl with much more severe issues than what I'm dealing with so in no way do I mean to do your situation any disservice.
Oh...and along with realizing I'm at least 'average'...I had a small NSV on my way to taking my laptop back into my office...my PJ bottoms (yeah, I work from home) fell down and I almost fell over my own feet..LOL.
I LOVE these PJ botttoms so much I'm seriously considering taking them to a tailor!!

I'm not active much anymore but always want to chime in on slow loss threads because I SO related during my loss phase. I averaged 6 pounds a month and had one double-digit month (month one, 11 pounds). It took me a year and a half to lose 107 pounds.
But - big BUT! I've kept it off for 9.5 years pretty effortlessly. That slower loss gives you extra time to work on the head side of weight loss. By the time I got to goal eating everything in moderation was just so natural to me that I never stopped and developed another food issue in maintenance. It's hard, but view this "extra" time as a blessing. Your body will have more time to adapt to weight loss, new habits, and new ideas before you enter the maintenance phase.
And don't be in a rush to enter maintenance! In hindsight, I can say maintenance is the more challenging part. It's accountability, it's strengthening those new habits, and it's for the rest of your life.
Cheri

What you are experiencing is something called "Self Licensing." It's where you justify misbehavior after being "good." People do it all the time. We really know how to do it with food, for sure. "I deserve it," "Just a bite won't hurt." "I've been good all week (or day) so I deserve a treat." We sabotage our forward progress with this self defeating mind set. Some of it might be based in fear - a fear of success or a fear of change. Anyway, it goes hand in hand with the "What the heck" mindset, which says, "Well I've already blown it today, so I might as well eat the whole thing. I can start fresh tomorrow." I don't know exactly how to "cure" these negative mindsets, but I do know that recognizing them and naming them is very helpful. If you find yourself starting to self license, take a second to identify and name what you are doing. Naming the behavior tends to objectify it and take it out of the emotional response realm and put it more into the thinking/rationale realm. Also see if you can identify the "What the heck" mindset. Again, naming it helps me a lot.
Once you know that it is actually a known human behavior that has a name, I think it is easier to deal with it. The key is to get back on track immediately. Don't blow the whole day just because of one bite. Get out and take a walk!!! I am glad you are dealing with this now, because believe me, you will deal with it after surgery, as well. Yes, the early days are easier when you have no appetite, but learning some tools to handle this kind of thing now will help you so much down the road when the appetite returns, the restriction is less, and you have no limitations as to what kind of food you eat. Turn this challenge into a learning experience and it really can be a good thing!

I don't think you'll find anyone on the forum who not only struggles to make good choices consistently, but also to accept that you can make a bad choice, forgive yourself and move on. This is the nature of the beast. It is really difficult to try to stay on very low calorie intake before your surgery. I'd focus more on high-quality choices, maybe trying out high-protein recipes, getting in more Water, etc. Instill those habits now. The drop in calories will happen naturally after the surgery. One warning - do NOT get in the habit of Protein Shakes now or you will be sooooo burned out by the time you actually need them! Best of luck to you!

I found it productive in that it eased me into the way I'd be eating post-surgery. But then, I wasn't eating 1000 calories a day - I was eating 2300 (given that I was averaging around 3000/day before that, even 2300 meant a significant drop in calories). My dietitian had me gradually increasing my Protein, gradually decreasing my carbs, weaning myself off caffeine & carbonation, making healthier choices, and exercising more. I think I would have really burned out if I was restricted to 1000 calories, though. I could easily do that after surgery, but before - not sure I could have sustained that for long.
anyway, by gradually transitioning my eating habits into what they would be like post-surgery made the change seem a lot less radical, I think.

Yes, November people rock! Thanks for your uplifting reply!

lost over 200 lbs. Used to have constant pain. Rarely have it anymore, and when I do, it's not nearly as bad as it was pre-surgery

Yes! SOOO much better! I've lost over 155lbs and my pain level is infinitely better. I can do so much more even with chronic issues still remaining!!

ALL. PAIN. GONE. (well at least the weight-related ones, lol)
Back pain, foot pain, hip pain, knee pain. ALL. GONE.
P.S. I lost 120 lbs.

I am 5 pounds away from hitting the 100 pound list mark. I had horrible pain I. My knees,hands, elbows and feet from arthritis. I was taking tumeric with bioperine and it worked amazing well for inflammation.
now that I am nearly 100 pounds down, I don’t even need the turmeric anymore!
i t just got cold where I live the past few days. I do feel a little achy in my knees now but nowhere near what it used to be. I am sure that my knees are damaged from carrying so much weight around though. I truly think that I was close to needing one knee replaced before losing the weight. I don’t feel that way anymore.
while you are trying to lose, do yourself a favor and try the turmeric. Just be sure that it has at least 10 mg of bioperine ( black pepper) in it and is 95% curcuminoids. Give it a week ir two of taking daily and you will be amazed what a simple spice can do for inflammation
Good luck on your journey!!

I haven't lost 100 pounds, but thirty, and I ALREADY can tell a vast difference in my knees. Even that weight loss is helpful if you have osteoarthritis in your joints.

I had my sleeve surgery 3 years ago tomorrow, total loss is in the 160's.
I didn't wake up one morning and just feel amazing, what it was more like for me was noticing little things that were no longer a hassle as I went day by day.
Getting on the floor to play with the dogs, vacuuming, standing to wash dishes for a longer period of time. Realizing the new things I could do crept up on me more.
I'll also say that I had to build up some strength as I was loosing weight too. I didn't realize how much proper posture would hurt as I taught my new body to use different muscles.

It'll be a very exciting journey, enjoy it moment by moment as you discover all the new things you'll be able to accomplish.

I started in July 2019 with diet & exercise. My weight then was 427 lbs. I couldn't stand for more than 10 minutes before my ankles and legs started hurting. My right hip was also in almost constant pain. My doctor wanted me to lose enough weight before surgery to get my BMI down to 50. I started tracking calories and exercising 4 to 5 days a week for 30 minutes. Once I started losing weight everything started to feel better. I had my surgery on January 16 and as of today I have lost 103 lbs, 80 prior to surgery, 11 lbs during one week liquid pre-op diet and now 12 lbs one week after surgery. My pain is 1000% better. I started with Water aerobics and after a month of that moved to doing recumbent bike, then onto elliptical trainer. Start slow doing what you can and try to increase every week. As you get in better shape and lose weight it will get even better.

I was 120 overweight and I’ve lost 104. Mostly, my general aches and pains are gone but the arthritis is my hip seems to be back and slightly worse. Could just be aging though.

I have so much more energy and can walk, and jog, long distances where I just couldn’t before. I would get too winded and overheated.

I’ve really not had a single regret.


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How are your general pain levels?
I ask because I'm about 150 pounds overweight and I have a lot of aches and pains. My knees, hips, back, etc. hurt almost constantly but especially when I'm moving, which deters me from moving and makes me not want to hit the gym which is the opposite of what I should be doing because movement is very healthy. I'm wondering if the weight lost from RNY will help me get back to the gym and get rid of the pain. I tried physical therapy but most of my treatments were temporary fixes (like traction for my back, needling my tight muscles, massage). It made me feel better but the pain returns.
Do you feel less pain now that you're lighter? Or is the damage pretty much already done? I want to run and jump and hike again so badly!

There are sometimes way for ppl who don't have insurance through work or the "Marketplace" to get insurance...but yes, we have some who encounter high bills.
Some of my friends in the UK, where they are covered by national medicine..and friends in Canada have pointed out though that in the US we often have quicker access depending on what your situation is.
I have a tendency to throw blood clots and I have read in horror as friends in the UK fight to get appts faster..and some of the things they have to go through to get specialists, meds, etc....I'm hoping they have been rare exceptions.
We also have ppl who can afford it...come to the US for quicker access from Canada AND the UK...sigh...wish there could be a balance between affordability AND availability for everyone.

True, true! I don't know how it is in the UK, Canada, or Australia but also trying to get in even for non-severe mental/emotional issues is....CRAZY. I remember primary referring family member to get a little more help with SITUATIONAL depression..although it was a severe case..and they were told left and right...6 months minimum..um...excuse me?
I will say we have come a long way with like coverage and access (as well as free for those who need it) to things like mammograms..now if they could just do that with all the other things we need access to more quickly. My pet peeve, especially with specialists is seeing that my plan only has like..let's say 10 docs in my area that cover that specialty...but 99% are no longer taking new patients...um...so there is only 1? And dang if it is not going to be the one furthest away or the one with the worst reviews..lol.
Sometimes healthcare..and we all know it from insurance hoops to get surgery if not self-pay..is like trying to plan a military campaign..
You last sentence made me laugh though...the irony of it

I've read for urgent cases, they can get you in pretty fast in the UK and Canada. It's the not-so-urgent and elective stuff that can take awhile, but that sometimes happens here as well. I had to wait three months to get in to see an endocrinologist, for example. And optometrists for a routine exam? Forget it. Takes forever. I finally went to an independent one instead of waiting six months to see one at my health maintenance organization's clinic. Oh - and annual physicals. Last time I called, my PCP was scheduling them a year in advance. A YEAR. Unbelievable. Thank God I wasn't dying (although I'm sure in that case, they would have gotten me in...)

There are sometimes way for ppl who don't have insurance through work or the "Marketplace" to get insurance...but yes, we have some who encounter high bills.
Some of my friends in the UK, where they are covered by national medicine..and friends in Canada have pointed out though that in the US we often have quicker access depending on what your situation is.
I have a tendency to throw blood clots and I have read in horror as friends in the UK fight to get appts faster..and some of the things they have to go through to get specialists, meds, etc....I'm hoping they have been rare exceptions.
We also have ppl who can afford it...come to the US for quicker access from Canada AND the UK...sigh...wish there could be a balance between affordability AND availability for everyone.

Thank you all for the feedback. After a sleepless night and a discussion with my insurance and the hospital billing office for 2 hours, the bill is being adjusted to $1100. Big difference, right?

Oh my gosh in 2 days I can LEGIT post to this thread (um....you don't see me right now....just pre-announcing my upcoming membership...LOL). Will be 6 months on 1/25/20!!
Think I'll be moving over from another thread...I wish more of the folks on there were further out so I could invite them along..but I think many are 3 months and less. Will go back and see..

Start advertising for the new Sophomore Class.